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A Midwinter's Tale
Author: Aprilmoon
Beta: Vesta
Email: [email protected]
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Glorfindel/Erestor
Warnings: none
Request: As long as it doesn't include Rape, Non-con, BDSM or Incest I'm not particular.
Written For: Keiliss
He was finished.
Erestor had been working quite hard on the last of the gifts he had been making for the household, and could hardly contain his excitement at giving them. He had always loved the Yule season, and this year was no different. Well, maybe a little different. He had never been one to complain about what he received for the Yule, but he was getting a bit tired of constantly receiving wine as a gift. He had worked at the Last Homely House for three hundred years now, and all he ever received was wine. He received wine for special occasions, anniversaries, birthdays, holidays, and gifts of appreciation. He just didn't understand why they constantly gave him wine, until this year.
Erestor had started to go around the house to give gifts to the household staff and the various scribes and soldiers, when he came upon a couple of elves talking. It just happen that one of the elves that was present happened to be the one that had held his heart from the first moment he laid eyes on him.
His name was Glorfindel. Lord of the House of the Golden Flower, Seneschal to Imladris, and Balrog Slayer extraordinaire. How Erestors heart swooned at the mere sound of his golden voice that sounded like the very voice of Eru himself. Erestor loved listening to him in counsel and even more when he graced the Halls of Fire with the songs he composed. Gods, to hear him sing was like having a feast. Erestor felt Lord Glorfindel could do no wrong, or at least he thought he could not.
Erestor shook himself from his musings to hear what the two, nay three, were saying. The other two were Lord Elrond himself and the March Warden Haldir from the Golden Wood. He knew he should not be listening, but he couldn't help himself. He just had to listen to find out what they were saying.
"So my Lord, how many more gifts do you need to acquire?" Glorfindel said.
"Just Erestor's, but his will be easy. I am going down to the cellar to get a special vintage for him this year. I thought he may like that. I wanted to tell you that if you're going to give him the same thing pick from the lesser vintages. I am getting tired of everyone giving my good wine away to him."
"Of course my Lord, but then again he is easy to buy for. No one has to buy him anything. They just go down to the cellar and pick something up. We all do it all the time, and Erestor does like it when we show him some attention. It is like playing with a puppy."
Haldir just looked at the two for a moment. He wonder what Celebrian would have said to that knowing that she had a bit of a soft spot for the counselor. But who was he to judge, if they wanted to do as they pleased, he could not stop them. He did wonder if it wasn't true. Erestor did seem to glow more in the attention of the Balrog Slayer, and Haldir wondered what would happen if this *puppy* of his became something more than he appeared. Haldir would like to find out.
"I see what you mean. He is just a counselor. Does he hold a title?" Haldir asked.
"He does and don't you forget it. He is my cousin, and no one disrespects him but me. He is not really anything special. He is just Erestor plain and simple. Anyway, Erestor should not expect much, for no one really likes him. They only seem to like the presents he gives. He is quite generous during the holiday season. He spends too much on us, and we spend as little on him as possible." Elrond laughed thinking what he said was funny not ever knowing that Erestor was just around the corner.
"Aye. It is too much of a bother trying to get him anything nice. He probably would not appreciate it anyway, and it might make him think we like him even more," Glorfindel said with a smirk.
Erestor just stayed there glued to the very spot he had stopped in when he heard the three approaching. They rounded the corner and their laughter and jesting stopped as they came in contact with the *butt* of their jokes. Erestor stood there lip trembling, tears streaming down his cheeks while clutching the basket that held the many gifts for the household. Erestor swallowed hard and tried to get his courage up, but it failed him. All he could do was stand there looking like the fool that they clearly thought he was and cry. He slowly turned around, dropped the basket, and left the scene. He knew now that he was a joke to all, and he didn't want to be around when they tried to hopelessly apologize of their carelessness.
The three just stood there looking at the retreating figure, and realizing then what true bastards they had just been. Haldir for not saying anything, Glorfindel for opening his big mouth and starting it, and Elrond for just being a huge giant ass. They all knew Erestor didn't deserve what was said, or what was thought about him. They were too caught up in the moment to realize that the words said had carried so much weight, and in an instant had ended up crushing Erestor's spirit.
Glorfindel was going to be the first one to speak, but it seemed someone had beaten him to it.
"I hope you three are proud of yourselves. I just passed Erestor and he asked for me to hand out the last of the gifts. He wasn't the only one to hear what you said. I am so disappointed in all of you, especially you Elrond. How could you say such things? Have you no heart at all? He is easy to buy for. Well, I hope you know you have just killed any hope he had and have just now crushed his spirit," Celebrian said as she passed the three the gifts Erestor had picked out for them.
They took the gifts she had handed them, and just looked. She asked if they were going to open them, and at first they appeared as if they didn't understand her. But after a moment, reality kicked in and they opened the brightly wrapped gifts like little children. Celebrian waited and watched as their eyes caught the beautiful pieces of work there before them. Erestor had really gone out of his way this year. He had purchased for everyone beautifully made hair clips that depicted the station of everyone in the house or their occupation. Elrond received one with the insignia of the healer and scribe, Haldir with one of a sword and bow crossing each other, and Glorfindel received one of a golden flower with a beautiful blue sapphire in the middle on top of two swords.
They all had never felt lower than they did at that very moment. Celebrian turned; anger still etched upon her face, and gave all three a look that spoke volumes. They all knew the crime that had been committed, but how to make it better. One could not just go and apologize and expect to be forgiven. It would take time to be granted a full pardon from the crime committed so ungraciously.
"I want the three of you to know that I am not pleased. Elrond and Glorfindel I am most disappointed, and Elrond you will be sleeping somewhere other than my bed until he forgives you. Haldir, I will inform my mother of this and have her act accordingly. And Glorfindel, Erestor cares for you more than he should. You do not deserve his love or affection."
Celebrian left the trio to their thoughts, and went to seek Erestor out. She knew that he would be in his room crying, and she did not know what to do or say to make it all better. Maybe she should not do anything. Maybe she should just be there for him, and to let him cry on her shoulder. She did not know what to do, but hopefully something would come to her soon.
Glorfindel stood there in shock over what he had just heard. Erestor had affection for him. No wonder he seemed to always be around when one least expected it. He looked at Elrond, made his excuses and left for his rooms. He needed to think about this, and figure out if he might have the same feelings for Erestor. For even though he had said those things, he was happy when he would see him around at unexplained times, and when he left had a sadness that seemed to consume him when he was gone. He needed to think, and fast. He bowed to Lord Elrond and left.
Haldir just looked at Elrond. He was still trying to figure out how on Arda he was at fault, but he did stay and listen. Even if he had said nothing he was an active participant in the conversation, which made him just as guilty. Elrond looked at Haldir and gave him a rather uncomfortable looking smile.
"I will talk with Galadriel Haldir; I will explain you were not involved."
"Even if I was not actively participating My Lord, to some degree I am still at fault. Please don't say anything. I would like to see my home before any children I was planning on having have grown, and had children of their own."
"You don't think she would send you away do you?"
"Nay, I would be guarding the northern borders by the time you had children. And that could just be the beginning of it all. Good day to you My Lord. I need to go and think about what has transpired here this day, and hope I can make amends to Lord Erestor for what happened."
Haldir bowed to Lord Elrond and left him to his thoughts. Elrond looked out the window and remembered a time when he and Erestor were children with Elros. They had all been happy. When was it that he had turned so bitter towards Erestor? Maybe it was because Erestor had had his family, and was raised by them. Erestor had been a happy child. Full of laughter and light, and now he feared tears and darkness. He had to finally admit to himself he was jealous of Erestor. He was jealous at the fact that Erestor had had a better childhood than he had, and had been loved. Erestor also still had his sisters and brothers, where he had only memories of Elros.
Elrond wanted to beat his head against the stone wall. How could he have been so insensitive for so long to Erestor and his needs. Erestor was once a social person and he did remember he had become a lot shyer when he had arrived. Of course Erestor would have tried to make merry with others. He was lonely just like a lot of people. He had wanted to make friends and everyone had seen was how deep his pockets went, himself included. And now they knew he was in love with Glorfindel, how would that affect the relationship with his Captain? Even with his participation with the jokes and banter about Erestor, he felt that Glorfindel felt something for his cousin as well, and he could have screwed that completely up now.
Gods, he was a jackass extraordinaire, and beyond. He would have to have Erestor's forgiveness before his wife would forgive him. The hardest part was how sincere all of it had to be in the end, for Celebrian to forgive him. He needed to think some more too, and he better do it quick for the evenings festivities were fast approaching and he would need to be ready for them.
Glorfindel had not gone to his rooms, but towards Erestors. He needed to apologize before it was too late. He raced towards the rooms hoping that he could beat Celebrian before she arrived. He was in luck. As he passed a corridor he noticed she was in a conversation with one of her handmaidens. He passed the corridor as quickly as he could and took off into a dead run to Erestor's rooms. Glorfindel approached the rooms as his second in command was passing him.
"My *Lord* Glorfindel may I have a brief word with you." Gildor had said with a bit of anger to his voice.
Glorfindel knew a lecture was coming on. Just by the way he had stressed Lord had said it all. He had no time to waste words with Gildor. He needed to speak with Erestor and fast.
"Not now Gildor. I need to speak with Erestor."
"He will not open his door for you. He wouldn't open it for Lady Celebrian, and if I do remember she has more sway with him than you my friend."
Glorfindel contemplated the meaning of the word friend that fell from Gildor's lips. He knew the sound and meaning of it, and it wasn't going to be pretty in the least. He had to speak with Erestor. He had to tell him he was sorry for what he said, and make amends. He just had to do it.
"If he won't open it, I will break the bloody thing down"
"So dashing and noble my *LORD*, one would think you care about him the way you carry on."
The words had hit their mark with unerring accuracy, and Gildor was the victor. Glorfindel stopped and just glared at him. No longer was the look of desperation, but of a warrior going into battle. He stood up to his full height and gave Gildor a look that could have frozen orcs in their tracks.
"And what, pray tell, does that mean?"
"It means if you are going to play with the big swords you better prepare for the consequences. He came running through here crying, and mumbling something about only truly being wanted for the things he could give. I did not understand fully when he told me that my gift was with Lady Celebrian until she informed me of what was said, and I will say that that may be true of a lot of people, but not me. Whatever possessed you to say that I will never know, Glorfindel? But just so you know, you have hurt him now beyond measure. That doesn't sound like the friend I know."
Glorfindel hung his head down as tears kissed his golden cheeks. He had gone too far with the joking. The remarks were not jokes, but of hurt to one that was so bright and warm. He wasn't jealous as much as he was scared of the feelings he had for Erestor. Erestor had been nothing but kind to him since he had arrived, and what had he done but keep him at a distance. For he knew to embrace Erestor and his love might burn him beyond repair should Erestor want to bestow his feelings to another. If he let Erestor love him, he would never be able to love another ever.
"I was wrong Gildor. Do you think he would ever forgive me?" Glorfindel said in a small voice.
Gildor's anger melted away at his friend's obvious pain. "I do, but Glorfindel you must be most sincere. He loves you and has for a long time, and what you said was more than hurtful. You wounded him more than if you had said it to his face."
"You are right my friend. Will you help me break down his door if I need to?"
Gildor sighed. "Of course I will. What are friends for, but after this I need to make haste to the jeweler. For you my friend, are going to need a very special present to make up for this along with several breakfasts in bed, and special favors among other things. We need to move fast before the lynch mob shows up. It is just a matter of time before one is formed, and headed by Lady Celebrian whom I would not want to cross in a dark alley."
"You, Gildor of Imladris, are scared of the Lady of Imladris."
"Let me think about this one. Yes, and she has connections, just remember that. You might wake up bald one morning, and whoever heard of a bald elf?" he said sarcastically.
Glorfindel knew he could not argue with that, for the connections were her mother, and that she-elf scared everyone, even her husband, who seemed to be spending a lot of time here of late at the Last Homely House. The two elves ran down the halls at break neck speed, and arrived in time to see Erestor coming out of his rooms. Erestor spied the two elves running towards and went to enter his chambers and close the door, but he wasn't fast enough. Glorfindel had arrived first and managed to get half of his body inside the door before Erestor could close it all the way. It meant he would be walking with a limp for a few days, but it was well worth in the long run.
Erestor wasn't pleased that he hadn't been quick enough at closing the door. Now, he had a twice born again Balrog Slayer in his room, who was about to become the thrice born again Balrog Slayer, and there was nothing he could do about it.
"Get out of my rooms you bastard and I mean now." It was obvious that Erestor had been crying, for he had red rimmed eyes and a very red nose to match.
"Erestor please just listen to me. I am sorry. I didn't mean to say what I did. You are right. I am a bastard. My words were callous and unkind, and what I said should not have been said. You have to believe me Erestor. I didn't mean what I said. It has been hard to adjust here, and I wanted to fit in. But, I shouldn't have done it at your expense. I am sorry."
"I hate you," Erestor said in a small voice. He just couldn't help it himself anymore. Standing in front of what he had hoped would be his one day had made him feel small and ugly. He just wanted Glorfindel to leave. His heart was broken and stomped on with his pride shredded and thrown to the wind. And when all else seemed to fall from grace, Erestor started to cry again. Sobs so loud they could be heard by the Valar, and tears so large and many they could have created rivers. His body shook so hard that Erestor collapsed upon the floor holding and rocking himself to bring some comfort, but for Erestor there could be none. He wanted his mother.
Glorfindel watched as Erestor crumpled before him. If they were trying to find a way to hurt him, they had succeeded. He felt so low, that not even the scum of hell would he have measured up. Glorfindel felt like he had just killed his best friend, and in some ways he had.
"Erestor please believe me when I say I am sorry. Please forgive me. I know that I do not deserve your forgiveness, but please believe me when I say I am sorry. I am a bastard, a loser, a piece of warg shite, a cretin, a cur, a jerk. I am not fit to lick the bottom of Feanor's boots after he has stepped in something foul. I am ...you can stop me at anytime now you know."
"Keep going. You haven't even gotten to the ones I was thinking about."
"Erestor I love you, and even if you won't believe me please understand I was wrong to do what I did. I said those things push how I feel about you away. I really do love you."
"I don't believe you." During the time Erestor had been crying Glorfindel had taken him into his arms, and helped him with the rocking. He held onto the slight elf loving the warmth of that his body gave off. It was a soothing feeling which he didn't think would ever be repeated.
"Erestor please do. I was going to give this to you after the feast tonight, because I didn't want anyone to see it. I just wanted you to see it." Glorfindel reached into his pocket and took out a beautiful silver locket on a silver chain. He opened it up, and to Erestors surprise it held a small lock of golden hair.
"I wasn't sure about my feelings for you, but I wanted to give this to you anyway. Please accept it. Again, I do love you."
Erestor was going to wipe his tears away with his sleeve, but Glorfindel beat him to it. To Glorfindel, Erestor looked so lost at that moment, and again regretted the words he had spoken in jest to Erestor. It had never been his intention to hurt the beautiful advisor. Erestor, still giving his body warmth to Glorfindel, took the locket and studied it for a moment. It was heart shaped with a butterfly etched on the front, and an elvish love knot on the back. It had a small red ruby in the center of the butterfly. It was truly a beautiful piece.
Erestor looked up at Glorfindel and gave him a small smile. He thought it was the most beautiful loving thing anyone had given him. But, he wasn't sure if he wanted to forgive Glorfindel so soon. He looked up into the big blue eyes and fell for him all over again.
"Thank you for your gift. I will treasure it." Erestor had built up a small wall around his heart in the time he and Glorfindel had been together in his room. His reply came out sounding small, and lacking any true passion at the moment. Glorfindel looked defeated by Erestors words. Erestor was afraid to open himself up again in case Glorfindel decided to use it against him.
"Erestor, maybe I should leave," he said. It was now Glorfindel to sound small and hurt. Erestor just looked at him for a moment. He wasn't sure if he should say the words he had wanted to say since he first seen Glorfindel, but he did.
"Don't go. I like your company, and I do enjoy being held in your arms. I love you." Erestor's 'I love you' had come out in a barely audible whisper. Glorfindel wasn't sure if he had heard correctly, so he decided to chance it and ask.
"Erestor did you say what I thought I heard you say?"
"Yes. I love you, and I forgive you. May the Valar forgive me, but I love you." This time the words came out louder, and with more love. Glorfindel's heart swelled, and even though he knew that it was way too soon to ask such things he was going to.
"Will you be my mate? Marry me and be my husband for always? I swear upon my soul and honor that I will never hurt you again. If I so do may Mandos take my life from me and never return me to the land of the living."
"Yes!!! But one should not say such things." Soon Glorfindel had two armfuls of wonderful beautiful Erestor.
"Only for you would I say such things and mean them," and with those words Glorfindel kissed Erestor sweetly upon his lips and held him in his arms. As far as he was concerned, the world could end and it wouldn't have mattered for he had the one thing he had been looking for.
After what had seemed like hours, Glorfindel got up pulling Erestor up on his feet, and the two headed for Glorfindel's rooms. Erestor had somewhat protested, saying he was not going to do that just yet, but Glorfindel reassured him that they were going to retrieve something from his rooms. When they reached Glorfindel's rooms he went inside and retrieved a small delicate bracelet.
"This was my mother's betrothal bracelet when my father proposed to her. I would be honored if you would wear it."
Erestor just smiled at him as he raised the wrist to Glorfindel "I am afraid I will lose it. It is so beautiful."
"Don't worry about it. As long as you want me that is all that matters. Do you really forgive me?"
"Yes, yes a thousand times yes."
Glorfindel grabbed Erestor in a fierce hug, and held onto him like his life depended on it. The two separated when they heard someone banging on the door. Glorfindel got up and proceeded to be a little cautious about opening the door, since Celebrian had last talked to him. He asked who it was and when the reply came back that it was Gildor he opened slowly.
Gildor walked, no practically pushed, his way in. The two elves looked him up and down and looked astonished at his appearance.
"Don't go out there for a while. The servants seem very protective of your Chief Advisor it seems. Lady Celebrian told one servant, and that is where it just seemed to go bad. They all formed a large lynch mob, lead by our lady of course, and they started to throw the Christmas pastries at Lord Elrond and Haldir. Lord Celeborn was trying to protect them, or mostly Haldir because I think he has a thing for him, and it got ugly really quick from there. If Lady Galadriel hadn't showed up I am not sure what would have happened. And oh yes, the party has been pushed back a day or so. Something about lack of dessert going around or something, and by the way nice betrothal bracelet," he said as he scraped a piece of cake off of his tunic.
Erestor just looked at Glorfindel, who just knew he was going to have to face the music eventually. "I will go with you," Erestor said. His eyes spoke of nothing but love and affection for the Balrog Slayer. Glorfindel knew that Erestor would be by his side the entire time, and for the first time did not mind going into battle.
"I love you."
"And I love you. This may not have been the best Yule, but I will make it up to you," Glorfindel said while caressing the soft cheek.
"I am sure you will."
Gildor rolled his eyes. How much of the mushiness could one take without one's teeth getting all crumbly from the sweetness? He needed to find someone for he was too young to be this sour. He looked at the two and saw the love that had been there all along. And as the two prepared to go out and face the crowd, he too would be there to support his old and new friend through this together.
The End
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