|
The Funniest things ever
said/done both
on and off the ice
"Hockey is murder on the
ice"
-- Jim Murray, sportswriter
"Hockey is a man's
game. The team with the most men wins."
-- Brian Burke, former hockey player
"Between you and me, I
think Don Cherry has been standing next to the speakers at an Aerosmith
concert. His brain's a little rattled."
-- Ann Killion, sports columnist
"It's tough to fly like
an eagle when you're surrounded by turkeys"
-- Don Cherry
"What's the 'C' stand
for? Selfish?"
-- Claude Lemieux's reaction to Eric Desjardins being named captain
of the Flyers
"Getting cut in the face
is a pain in the butt"
-- Theo Fleury
"Yeah, I'm cocky and
arrogant, but that doesn't mean I'm not a nice person"
-- Jeremy Roenick
"Lunch is on me"
-- Brendan Shanahan after signing a $26 million contract
"Every time I see you
naked, I feel sorry for your wife"
-- Jaromir Jagr to Matt Barnaby
"Everybody knows
everything about me - plus the 90% that never happened."
-- Pavel Bure
"We only speak two
languages here - English and profanity"
-- Kevin Constantine
"Every time I get
injured, my wife ends up pregnant."
-- Doug Wilson commenting on his time spent at home while out with
an injury
"I think you can fault
the goaltender - fault a goaltender because of the losses. I think
that you win as a team, and you lose as a team, but only if the goalie
doesn't suck and let everything in."
-- Larry Robinson
Don Cherry
Somebody once described Don Cherry as "hockey's Dizzy Dean,"
referring to the former baseball pitcher who became a TV broadcaster and
irritated English teachers across America with his folksy sayings and
fractured syntax. Cherry is much the same. He drops his g's -
nothin' and somethin', for instance - and says what's on his mind, even if
it comes out sounding a little...odd. "You know we have a
language policy here," said a broadcast executive, protesting the
decision to hire Cherry on Hockey Night in Canada. "This
guy doesn't speak English." This executive couldn't have foreseen
that Cherry would be a hit in part because of his unusual way with
words. As Ralph Mellanby, former Hockey Night in Canada
producer, points out, "Don has become a TV star in two languages -
and he doesn't speak either of them."
Sharks Fan gives her all
A new chapter in the ancient custom of throwing things at hockey games
occurred on March 29, 1994, at the San Jose Arena. A woman peeled
off her bra a threw it onto the ice. The Sharks were playing
Winnipeg, and Sergei Makarov of the hometown boys had just scored his
third goal of the game. Caps cascaded onto the ice along with - yes
- the bra. Sports Illustrated reported that it was "a
frilly red bra, size 36C," and that it formally belonged to one Mari
Ivener of Sunnyvale, California. Mari got carried away with Sergei's
feat and lacking a hat, threw the next best thing. "It was a
gorgeous red Victoria's Secret garment, perfect for Sergei the Red,"
she told a reporter. Even jaded hockey writers, accustomed to dead
fish and such things being hurled onto the ice, took note of Mari's
sacrifice. Said Bud Geracie: "A red brassiere was thrown
onto the ice after Sergei Marakov's third goal Tuesday night.
Stanley Cups?"
|