You know what one of the perils of being bald is? When you shave your head, if you're not careful, you can cause a wee bit of damage. I was rushing last night when shaving my head, and I sliced the top of one of my ears pretty good...oh you should have seen it. I was in the kitchen right after and saw blood dripping on the floor and was like "what the heck???" only to go look in the mirror and see blood running down my ear to my neck. Don't worry, I'm ok...I know everyone is concerned...hahaha. As long as gangrene doesn't set it I'll be fine. Man, they'd give me a shot of whiskey, a bullet to bite on, and saw my ear off. I'm a man...I can take it...hahaha. Which reminds me...one time I had both of my big toes with bad ingrown toenails when I was about 16. Well, at the time I was basically allergic to every local anesthetic out...so they tried something new because they were going to have to rip both toenails out. Guess what...the shots didn't work. So I had both big toenails ripped out with no pain killer at all. After the first one I was like "OK OK...I'LL TELL YOU WHERE THE OFFENSIVE IS PLANNED!!!" Yeah I'd make a horrible P.O.W. In reality after the first one was yanked I said "ok man, you gotta give me a few minutes before you do the other one". It literally felt like someone was holding a lighter under my big toe. But enough one that....
Well the new CD is DONE! That's right...nine new blistering tunes all mixed and mastered. We should hopefully have them available by next weekend if we get the artwork back from the printing place. The new cover is awesome...I love it. Plus there's a kickass picture of me on the back...so that's a HUGE plus...hahaha. I'm listening to the final product titled "One From None" as I type...and it sounds killer. I hope we get the new CD's back in time because we've got two gigs on April 29th and the 30th, so check out www.noisecult.com or www.myspace.com/noisecult for the places and time. I can't wait to play these new tunes live. And I can't stress enough how varied the whole new CD is style-wise...if you like hard rock and metal there is literally something for everyone...unless you like power ballads. I will NEVER do a power ballad...not you're typical radio-friendly crap anyway. Any slow songs always deal with betrayal, heartbreak, etc, and they all sound evil and cool....hahaha. I did record a typical power ballad once about 13 years ago. It was called "Life On The Road" and was basically a parody of all those cheesy crappy ballads hair bands were doing. Everyone that has ever heard laughed uncontrollably so I know it's good. I mean come one, I rule at making fun of stuff so you could only imagine the tune. It's the tale of a rock star on the road and the hell he goes through....you know lines like "because all I do is do free drugs and drink free booze and wake up by a different blonde in the morning" and don't forget "I make more money in one night than most people do in a lifetime...but I'm in this for the art and not for the money...it all means so much to me and I do it all for my fans". Whatever. I've said it once and I've said it a million times...if I EVER refer to the songs I write as "art" just please put a bullet in my head. We'll have some new tracks posted at the mentioned websites in the next day or so so keep an eye out!
Ready for some Senate news? I knew you were...I mean it's ME we're talking about here! Anyway, I already mentioned I'll be speaking in Memphis next month, and this week I ordered my bumper stickers and business cards. Also, I'm starting to get all these surveys in the mail by various groups like the NRA and stuff asking my position on certain issues so they can post them on their websites. Very weird. I also got my first piece of hate mail! Some dude wrote me and said "skinheads like you are ruining our party". I had to tell Einstein I'm an independent which means I don't belong to a party. And didn't the whole skinhead thing kinda go out in the 1990's? Of course I could say he was being a hate-monger for assuming I was a skinhead just because I'm follically challenged...hahahaha. Is "follically" even a word? Well if it's not, I just invented it and expect total credit for it. But I'm starting to get more and more email from people who are hearing about me and giving me their support. I know winning this is a HUGE longshot...but if I can just make some noise I'll be a happy guy. I'd say 98% of all politicians or morons anyway and they need to face someone like me who has no fear of telling it like it is.
I saw one of the best live gigs I've ever seen Saturday night...I mean I was COMPLETELY blown away. Now when I go to a club and see a band I've never seen, it takes a lot of me to remember anything about them because most of them just suck. But this band was amazing...so good I actually bought a CD of their's at the gig which I NEVER do for someone I've never heard before. But before I get into all that...let me explain how my Saturday started. I mean it was going to be a simple enough Saturday - the plan was to go pick up Nathalie, go eat, and then head off to my first Nashville Predators' hockey game. Well on my way up the interstate I hear this loud "WHACK!" and look at my passenger window and see my side rearview mirror knocking up against the window. I honestly have no clue how this happened. My only guess is that the other candidates in the Senate race see me as a danger, or some Muslim terrorists who don't like me talking about them took a shot at me on the interstate and took my mirror out...or it could have been a rock off a truck...hahaha. I really don't know what happened. So after I pick up Nathalie I had to stop at Wal-Mart and try a quick repair job - Crazy Glue and Duct Tape. Oh yeah, my car is stylin' baby! I coated the inside of it with glue, and then while she held it in place I layered it all in Duct tape. But then smoke started coming out of it...seems the crazy glue had some kind of reaction to the foam rubber. So yeah, I looked pretty suave, don't you think? Now I have a car that REALLY fits in around Nashville...it has duct tape on it! AWWWWW YEAH!!! Moving on now...we get downtown and go eat...and after that we go to the arena where they were offering free tickets to people who would shave their heads. Yeah, that kinda left me out of the picture, huh? I wanted to see what would happen if I asked...but they had these two dudes on the street in front of the GEC (the arena here) that were part of all that X-games stuff doing these WILD stunts on their motorcycles. Serious, these guys had a runway of what looked to be about 30 yards...would hit the ramp...do some insane stunt in mid-air, and land on the other ramp. The announcer said these dudes were getting to about 75 feet in the air. I mean it was insane...I've seen this stuff on TV some and it looks ok, but being right there next to it was unreal. Ok, to continue on...this was the first NHL game I had been to since I was about 4 years old...and man did it rock. Nashville won 5-1 and their goalie even scored a goal which kicked ass to see. Now what I don't get is this - the tickets I got weren't cheap and there were a couple of people sitting next to us who didn't seem to watch the game at all. All they did was talk about some school stuff, someone's wedding they knew...blah blah blah. I was thinking to myself "they sure spent a lot of money to talk about junk they could have talked about at home". Made no sense to me...but whatever. After the game we met a couple of people she knows at this club to see a Rush tribute band...and no this isn't the band I was referring to earlier. Now these guys rocked...the singer/bass player/keyboardist even looked a little like Geddy Lee. I heard songs played that I haven't heard in years...and they definitely had Rush down. Now here's something that cracked me up - I'm not a drummer but I do know the Rush drum parts in my head. I mean if the dude botched something I would know since I know the older songs so well. While we're watching them, Nathalie goes "I can't believe it...the guy is using triggers". Yeah, my thought exactly...I was like "ummm....what does that mean". She explained to me, since she's a drummer, that the guy had triggers hooked up to all his drums so when he hit them he could keep them in sync, play effects, etc. Basically based off her description it sounded like using them was a way to almost cheat. So yeah, hearts are swirling around my head based on the fact she could tell me something like this...hahahaha. We all hung out there for a while until the band took a break...and then I did something I have never done in all my years of living in Nashville - hit various clubs around the GEC while country bands were playing. Now I'm not a country fan, but if it's OLD country I don't mind. I just can't stand all the new stuff I've heard over the last decade or so. We check a couple of places out...then go get something to eat and watch a band play where the lead guitarist is actually playing violin. Ever hear the big guitar solo in "Freebird" played on the violin? Yeah, I hadn't either...it's pretty interesting. Well, we were both pretty tired and started to head back to my car...but then something caught both our eyes. The last club we passed had a band playing, we both looked in and saw this dude on stand-up bass who was just going to town! I mean this guy was just all over the place...and it was rockabilly music which I really dig. So we go in to watch a song or two and the next thing I know we've watched them play for about 45 minutes. The name of the band was The Dempsey's and they were UNREAL! If you live around Nashville you HAVE to check these dudes out. They were just all incredible musicians and played with so much friggin energy. Not only did I buy a CD...but this will tell you how impressed I was...I went up to them after the set to talk for a minute because I wanted to let them know how blown away I was. Yeah...it was THAT good. I mean outside of that Danzig gig I went to last year, and anything my band NoiseCult has done...it was the best live show someone could see....hahahaha. The thing is, I was watching these guys and thinking to myself "how in the heck are these guys not just HUGE when some crap like Coldplay is racing up the charts?" I don't get it...but that's the music business...just because you're really good doesn't mean much.
Remember...in two weeks the movie "United 93" opens and I would suggest EVERYONE go see it. I've heard some early reviews of it, and supposedly it's gut-wrenching. Yeah, it may be tough to watch, but we need to be reminded of the absolute evil we need to exterminate. Those terrorists are such a bunch of cockroaches...and they can't be reasoned with at all. I love how the media is like "is America ready for this movie" and I would say HELL YES!!! We NEED this movie. We need to be reminded that the terrorists don't want to kill us because we have freedom, as President Bush likes to say, and they don't want to kill us because we did something to them, as hardcore liberals like to say, they want to kill us because we are not under Islamic law...it's that simple. And until some politician grows a pair and says that, we are in big trouble.
That's it for this week...later Sportsfans!