Man...it's awesome that the Olympics have started isn't it? Is everyone as excited as I am? Yeah....anyway...
The weirdest thing about living in Nashville is the winter. Serious, if there's even a REMOTE chance it will snow, people flock to the grocery store and stock up on 3 weeks worth of milk, bread, and eggs like a nuclear holocaust is about to go down. This past Friday night we were supposed to get a record snowfall...around here that means anything over 5 inches. But thankfully global warming intervened and we had a little freezing rain and that was about it. Man was I ticked off. All week the idiot weather people were all like "OH BOY! We're in for a HUGE winter snowstorm!!! Here it comes everyone!!! Stock up on milk, bread, and eggs or else you'll have to resort to cannibalism to stay alive!!!" They made it sound like that scene where Tom Cruise is fending off everyone with a gun in "War of the Worlds" was about to go down with the chaos all this snow was going to cause. All day Friday people were talking about how their weekend would be spent at home until this winter crisis passed...and when it started to rain at about 4 in the afternoon on Friday...the place I work became a ghost town. EVERYONE rushed home to await the impending doom so they wouldn't be caught out in the middle of the second ice age. Driving home that day was excrutiating...it really was. At the time it was mainly rain falling with a few snowflakes mixed in and people were driving like it was white-out conditions...I was literally going 20 in a 45 mph zone at one time all due to some moron in front of me who thought he'd skid off the road due to the arctic blast and be trapped under his car for days before a rescue team would get to him and he would have to end up eating his extremities cooked over a Bic lighter to stay alive. My normal 40 minute drive with HEAVY traffic lasted almost an hour due to the other drivers' fear of careening off the road due to the mist in the air. People here are such wimps sometimes with the way they drive. Someone could spit on the road and people would start screaming and swerving out of control. Every day I have to drive home in this moving parking lot called I-440, and when the weather is the slightest bit less than perfect, I might as well get out and walk. I can see it now...Johnny cell phone earpiece guy calling home..."honey...this may be the last time you ever hear from me...there's a little rain falling and I see a snowflake in it every now and then...I may not make it...I know I haven't been a perfect husband but I have tried my best...just tell the kids I love them and I hope you have enough bread, milk, and eggs to last until tomorrow when the roads are clear". As usual, the idiot weather people were wrong and we got a slight dusting of snow but mainly rain. I wanted a blizzard...I really did. I went outside to play with my dog a little before 8 o'clock and it was snowing some, but nothing major. I figured I would go inside, grab a drink or two, watch the movie "Doom", and when I went back outside to play with Vick after the movie was over there would be at least a couple of inches of snow on the ground with the way the TV was reporting it. So I watched "Doom"...which was quite enjoyable, I mean you have the military with LOTS of guns and monsters so you know it's going to be at least above decent...and I go back outside after the movie and there is NOTHING. At the very least I figured I would get up in the morning and see snow on the ground. I go to sleep and get up...and guess what? The sun is out and there's a patch here and there with a light dusting. I'm surprised anyone was out in such treacherous conditions...maybe they didn't stock up on bread, milk, and eggs and decided to battle the elements so they wouldn't have to resort to cannibalism to stay alive. I remember a few years ago a freak snowstorm hit Nashville at about 8 in the morning, and I decided to call in sick to work because I just had this gut feeling I shouldn't even try to go in. Thankfully my gut never lies to me. The company I worked for at the time, along with every other place in town, closed for the day. People I knew that went to work that day said it literally took them over 6 hours to get home...can you believe that??? To take a usual 30 minute trip took 6 hours!!! All I know is that if I had gone to work that day and then spent 6 hours in traffic trying to get home, the headline story on the news that night wouldn't have been about the snowstorm, it would have been about some deranged madman driver who started snapping people's necks and pushing their cars off the road so he could make his way home. In fact, it was so bad here that day that I tried to call a friend of mine that I worked with and for HOURS I kept getting a message on my cell phone that my call couldn't be completed...and that's because EVERYONE in the area was using their cell phone telling their loved ones they would probably never see them again because they would be trapped in their cars for days and have to feed on their own body to stay alive. And to think...Spring is coming up where we get some LOVELY Spring thunderstorms to drive home in. Oh if you thought it looked bad in New Orleans when Hurricane Katrina hit, you haven't seen anything like Nashville drivers in a thunderstorm. Absolutely infuriating.
I picked up the latest Beastie Boys CD today, and I gotta say, these dudes have taken a step backwards. And believe me when I say I know how to kick it old school. A few good songs but nothing spectacular. It's no Ice-T doing "Original Gangsta"....awwwwwww yeah!
Ok ok, I know everyone is DYING for what's going on with my band NoiseCult. Well for starters we have three days of studio time booked in March to record some new stuff...along with re-recording a couple of the older tunes now that I'm doing vocals. The new stuff we have is pretty kickass, and there's even one tune where I have to actually somewhat sing on it. Oh don't worry, it's not a stupid ballad or anything...we don't do those...we play man's music. You know what drives me nuts? I can't stand how serious musicians take themselves. Take Bono for example. The dude sings some 3 minute pop tune and all of the sudden he has all the answers to solve the world's problems? Ummm...sure thing pal. "Through the power of my art I can wipe out world hunger"...ok dude...we'll be right there to help you out in a little while. I told this girl one time that if I ever start to refer to the songs I write as "art", just please put a bullet in my head. They're songs...they're tunes that last 3 or 4 minutes that some people might like...a song does NOT change the world. It's like that South Park episode where all the hippies show up and have a festival, and when Kyle and Stan ask when they're going to start taking down the evil corporations the hippies say "we're doing it through the music man!". Cartman at least had it right...he hates hippies and knew that hippies hate Slayer...hahahahaha. What an episode. It just amazes me that someone can write a song and think it's going to alter world history. How conceited do you have to be? that's why I dig the bands I do...they aren't trying to change the world...they just want to rock out. That's why when someone like Bruce Springsteen gets out there to speak for a political candidate I'm like "whatever man...go play you're little songs and just shut up". I guess being an "artist" makes you more enlightened then the rest of us idiots. You know what the funny thing is? Most of the moron musicians who get all political always support a liberal agenda...and we all know how idiotic that is. If you don't, then I feel bad for you. Oh wait, if you need an explanation of the liberal agenda, let me sum it up real quick - if any situation makes you take a stand on what's right and what's wrong and you don't want to...that's the liberal agenda. Heaven forbid there be an actual right and wrong.
You know what cracks me up about myspace.com? It's when these girls put these HOT photos on their profiles and then put in their bios "please don't contact me wanting to hook up". Sure thing honey...so why do you have all the shots of you in a thong bent over? I'm sure you're a fine and upstanding old fashioned girl who wants someone to see you for who you really are and what you have to offer...not just as someone they can hook up with...hahahahaha. Get over yourself.
You know what the saddest thing in the world is? Watching an old man cry. I broke out the "Band of Brothers" DVD's over the last couple of weeks and the other night watched the doc of the guys telling the actual stories behind the episodes. To think these guys are in their 80's or so and still get choked up about something that happened over 50 years ago really speaks of the emotional impact more then anything a movie could display. To see these guys talking about the true events and then you see the lip quivering and one even had to say "I can't talk about this" is gut-wrenching. If you don't know..."Band of Brothers" is the true story about a group of soldiers with Easy Company of the 101st Airborne in World War II. I've seen the series probably 5 or 6 times all the way through and it never loses it's impact. As if the episodes weren't emotional enough, to hear the real guys who lived through it talk about it is unreal. I'll never forget one night when I went with my dad to his boss' house for a dinner. I'm a kid...about age 12...and at that time I was fascinated with the military and especially World War II. It just so happened that his boss at that time was one of the guys who went through D-Day...June 6th, 1944. He landed at Omaha Beach where the heaviest of the heavy went down. What I'll never forget is when he was telling me about it because he knew I was interested in it all...he told me this story about when he hit the beach and was pinned down by machine gun fire and was behind one of the tank traps on shore. They were these big metal objects that almost looked like jacks. He told me this dude freaked out and ran out from the cover and advanced towards the machine gun bunkers. There was an explosion and when the sand finally settled enough to where he could see...the guy that went charging was laying there screaming. The upper half of his body with about 30 feet of intestines and then his lower half...the guy screamed for a bout 5 minutes before he died....he had tripped on a mine and it blew him in half. The man is telling me this story while his eyes are just fixed on the ceiling...no emotion at all. It's like a couple of years ago when I was at Wal-Mart looking through a bin of bargain DVD's. There was an older guy going through them also, and I had a few war movies in my hand that I found. This guy asks me if they were any good and I told him I liked them...and then he tells me he can't watch war movies anymore because they make them so realistic. I asked him when he served and this guy fought in Korea. He then starts telling me stories. For instance the first night he was in Korea...he told me they landed at the airfield and came under fire. They start to advance against the North Koreans and end up in a huge firefight. The only way they could protect themselves was to stack up the frozen bodies of the dead soldiers at the airfield and use them for cover. This guy told me stories for about a good 15 minutes or so, then said he needed to go meet his wife who was shopping for something....he shook my hand and said "thanks for listening". I don't know what it is, but I guess I give off this vibe that people can just tell me anything because that's the not only time something like that has happened. I just have such an appreciation for anyone who has fought in the military I can't even explain. I tried...I really did. In high school the only thing I wanted to do was to go into the military. But two back operations later and I got disqualified from an Army ROTC scholarship and I was pretty devastated. I was going to join the National Guard when I was 17 and do my basic training the summer before my senior year of high school...but I couldn't because of my first back operation. My second back operation meant I couldn't do the physical aptitude test for the Army when I was 18 so that sucked. It was all I wanted to be...a soldier...and I couldn't. I had my heart set on going through jump school and Ranger school with the hopes of getting a chance at being in the Special Forces...no lie...that's all I wanted....and then I couldn't. On one of my walls I have a copy of the Declaration of Independence signed by my great great great great great grandfather Thomas Heyward. Next to it I have the Heyward coat of arms. But below that I have my Grandfather's World War II victory medal...he fought in the Pacific...along with my dad's 81st Infantry patch...which is the oldest insignia in the Army and was established in 1918 as the Wildcat division...and I even have a patch from the 101st Airborne that was actually worn during a combat jump during the Tet Offensive in Vietnam in 1968...a friend of my dad's gave that to me. I have them all framed and display them with pride. I have a box filled with various patches and awards that I've collected over the years. A lot of people look back at their past with some regret over a chance they didn't take or a missed opportunity...I really regret that I couldn't serve when I wanted to but it was out of my control so I guess I really can't look at it with regret...it was just the way things were, you know?
Well that's it from my ADD mind tonight...until next time Sportsfans!