And now it's all over...my week of bliss ended two weeks ago and it's back to the world of cubicles.  I swear I could cry sometimes.  That week after Christmas was amazing.  Why?  Because I didn't have to go anywhere or be anywhere at any certain time.  To borrow from Peter Gibbons in "Office Space", I did nothing and it was everything I thought it could be.  I started off that Monday with a giant bowl of Fruity Pebbles and went from there...I was in complete slug mode.  Yep, my week was nothing but eating junk, playing video games, and watching movies...that was it.  Some might think "wow, what a boring week" but OH how wrong you are.  This dude needed it badly.  In fact, I knew how stress free I was when one day I actually ventured out to go to the store for some supplies and not once did I get mad at anyone else on the road...can you believe that?  Sadly it all came to an end when about 5 minutes into my drive to work on the first day back I was livid with this woman in front of me who wouldn't turn right when I wanted her to.  Every bit of peace and tranquility was gone at that moment, and now it's back to the usual daily grind...sigh.  The worst thing that happened on my week off was when my dog decided to take a crap in the hall.  First off, if you didn't know I have a German Shepherd that weighs about 110 pounds, but then again you should know because a couple of weeks ago I put that picture up of him posing with my handsome self.  Anyway, that week off I had been bringing him inside at night and he was actually behaving, I couldn't believe it.  He would come in, find a spot on the floor and chew on a rawhide bone for a couple of hours then fall asleep.  It rocked because it was cold as heck that week and I didn't want to get off the couch...hahahaha.  Now it's New Year's Eve.  You might be wondering how someone as cool as me spends their New Year's Eve and I'll tell you...a couple of buddies came by and we ate, drank, played video games and watched a horror movie and heavy metal concert videos.  Sounds exciting huh?  Well it kicked major ass because I hate New Year's anyway.  About 10 o'clock people started shooting off fireworks, and my attack dog freaks out over fireworks.  He started clawing at the door to come in but I didn't want to let him in at that time otherwise he might think all he has to do is claw at the door to get a free trip inside.  I am lord of the manor, I will decide when he can come in.  So I go outside and put him out of the garage and shut the garage door so he couldn't get back in.  Mean?  Nah...the dude needs to toughen up, plus I would leave him out for a few then I'd bring him in.  Ok, so after a few minutes of that I let him come inside much to the delight of my bud Jason who Vick always seems to gravitate to.  I have no idea why...it's funny though because Vick always bugs him to death...hahahaha.  Always play biting and stuff.  Anyway, my bud Don asks "So does he ever go to the bathroom in the house?"  I explained that he took a piss once when I first had him, but since that time he hadn't.  Well of course I say that like a proud parent who is thrilled with his child's accomplishments.  And in a wonderful example of how my life goes sometimes, right after I say that I look down the hall and Vick is pissing up a storm.  I grab him by the collar screaming "NO!" at him and put him outside and then start cleaning up the mess with various cleaners and cleansers.  He stayed outside the rest of the night.  I chalked it up to the fact he didn't want to go out into the yard because he was scared of the fireworks.  I know, you're thinking "But Bo, you said he took a crap in the house" and I'm getting to that so hang on a sec...jeez.  Anyway, it's now the next day and people come over to watch football and Atlanta gets KILLED to end the season and I have to go back to work the next day so a cloud of gloom is already hanging over me.  Well after everyone leaves I decided I would end the day with a movie and loaded up the classic film "The Warriors".  I brought Vick inside thinking the previous night was just an isolated incident.  This time I made sure he pissed before I let him come inside so I thought all was well.  Oh how wrong I was.  He comes in and whenever he does, he follows me wherever I go, the kitchen, the bathroom, wherever.  Well I was in the kitchen getting something to drink and didn't see him.  I look down the hall and he's sitting by my bedroom door which I thought was a wee bit strange.  So I called to him and he follows me back to the kitchen.  While I'm finishing getting something to drink, I look to the kitchen door and only see his tail poking around from the other side...and the way his tail was I knew exactly what he was doing.  Slow motion hit with me dropping everything screaming "NOOOOOOOO!" as I turn the corner and see what looked like the contents of a GIANT bowl of chocolate pudding smack in the middle of the hallway.  I grabbed him yet again screaming "NO!" and put him outside.  I came back in and just stared at his unexpected surprise wondering how in the heck I was going to clean this up, as if my day wasn't already going bad.  Just like the Falcons did, Vick laid a giant turd...hahahaha...get it?  Oh if only it had been a turd instead of chocolate pudding.  I can't even describe the volume he released, it was the stuff legends are made of.  I swear I thought I was at the elephant exhibit at the zoo.  Oh, and to add to it, it had this overpowering stench of onions and ammonia...that's about the only way I can describe it.  Since I didn't have a biohazard suit handy, I put my brain to work and grabbed a few trash bags.  I wore a trash bag over each arm, and took handfuls of paper towels and scooped it all into another trash bag while trying not to pass out from the odor.  After that I poured a TON of this all purpose cleaner I have on it and scrubbed it down to the carpet padding just about.  And then to finish it off I took some carpet cleaner and once again saturated the spot and scrubbed it again with a giant brush.  After that I emptied a can of air freshener in the house while burning about 10 scented candles to get rid of that smell.  Yep, the perfect end to my week off.  Has he been back in the house since?  Ummm...no.  I swear it was like he crapped half his body weight.

Now normally I HATE Valentine's Day.  Why?  Well it always is filled with tales of tragedy and a broken heart so I won't go there tonight.  But this year is going to different.  Do I have a hot date?  Please...you saw "40 Year Old Virgin" so you know that guys like me with horror movie posters hanging on the wall, an extensive heavy metal CD collection and a bookcase sporting figures of Snake Plissken and the cast of "The Devil's Rejects" don't exactly have chicks beating down their door.  I mean one would think I would seeing how darn good-looking and charming I am, so I can't figure it out.  But anyway, this year Valentine's Day will be different and I can't wait.  I know, I've got you curious, don't I?  Well while all the saps are out there bending over backwards to make it a special day for their significant other, I've got better plans.  Like I said, my Valentine's Days are filled with tales of heartache and woe from which I'll spare everyone from, so one might say I've become quite bitter towards that day.  This year it's all different.  The reason is "Saw 2" hits DVD that day!!!  YEAH!!!  Yep, while people are watching "Brokeback Mountain" since it's labeled "an epic love story", I'll be watching soon to be classic cinema.  Seriously, critics called "Brokeback Mountain" an epic love story...saw it on TV the other day during an ad for it and laughed.  I mean as if I needed ANOTHER reason to not go see that, calling it an epic love story really cemented it...I already sat through that piece of crap "Message In A Bottle" once and I felt so dirty afterwards, compromising my principles like that to take a girl to see that movie.  Ok, now you're thinking "well you're just some HOMOPHOBE then!!!"  No, I'm not afraid of gay people at all, which is what that term implies...like I'll see a gay dude and run screaming.  Heck let's even take the gayness out of the movie for a sec...from what I've heard, at least one of the characters is married, so that means it's a beautiful thing to watch a dude cheat on his wife and we're supposed to think it's touching???  But back to my big day.  It will start with dinner at Hooters...reason being the movie is out on a Tuesday and on Tuesday nights its buy 10 wings and get 10 free!  And man do I love wings.  Hooters is a funny place, I almost enjoy watching the customers more then anything else.  It's mainly guys as if you didn't know, and so many of them think because the waitress is acting all nice to them that they might get a phone number or something...hahahaha...oh so naive.  So the guy leaves a big tip thinking it will impress the girl and it never does so she moves on to the next customer.  In fact, what's weird is out of all the Hooters that I've been in, let's say 20 girls are working just to keep it a round number, maybe 1 is pretty hot and maybe 2 others are above ok.  The girls usually aren't all that with the ones I've been to.  I saw better looking women at the grocery store tonight then most of the waitresses that were working this past Tuesday when me and a buddy went.  But I do love their wings and the hotter the better.  So yeah, me and a bud will be eating tons of wings and then check out "Saw 2", so the night will rock.  Man what a movie.  Oh, and speaking of movies, everyone has to check out "Transporter 2".  The first one was pretty cool, but the only thing that could have made this movie any better was if dude was also fighting against zombies.  If zombies had been in it, it could have been the perfect film.  It had everything I require in a cool movie - tons of kickass fights, car chases, guns, explosions, and a lead guy actor who is one loner badass with no time for chicks.  The movie is one of the ultimate guy movies of all time.  Even in "Escape From New York", Snake Plissken started to move in on a girl before she got yanked through the floor by some dudes who dwelled underground in the sewers.  The people who made "Transporter 2" did it right...they knew someone like me didn't want to see all this soft tenderness when watching an action movie...I want fights, necks snapping, dudes getting shot, and lots of roundhouse kicks.  So guys, if you want a way to really tick your girlfriend off, rent that one night and let her sit through it...if she enjoys it marry her on the spot because you've found a rare woman.

And now my U.S. Senate race update.  I just got the paperwork from the state in the mail the other day and should have it filed pretty soon which will put my name on the ballot, however I'm still having a hard time getting my name out there.  For instance, I already mentioned about getting denied to appear at the debate on January 31st, and now I get denied my chance to appear at the Senate Q&A forum that the Tennessee Press Association is having here in Nashville on February 9th.  I couldn't believe it...I called them and got the name and number of the dude who is coordinating the whole thing, told him who I was and that I'm filing to run and wanted to be on the panel and he said "no".  It had something to do with the fact they've been putting stories together on the "real" candidates to lead into it and blah blah blah.  There USED to be a thing called "Equal Time Laws" which meant that any legal candidate had to invited to any appearance the other candidates were invited to...but not anymore.  So politicians could protect themselves against someone like me who isn't afraid to speak his mind, they redid the laws to where now basically any public appearance is called "on the spot news" and those appearances are exempt from the law.  This includes debates too, if you can believe that...like debates aren't planned in advance yet they still somehow call them "on the spot news"...whatever.  What a bunch of cowards.  When I started this whole thing, I was already pretty jaded about politics and now I'm even more jaded and cynical, if that's possible.  I listen to Michael Savage a lot on the radio, and he had a great point - politicians are just like lawyers...they don't care about getting to the truth, all they care about is their side winning.  I'm still going to keep pushing forward on this and see what happens.  I'm not giving up even if the only vote I get next November is when I vote for myself.  It will just be something else to add to my list of accomplishments.  I mean how many people do you know that can say they wrote a book, were in a professional wrestling match (long story...it was this charity thing I did), were a DJ at a radio station, a sports broadcaster on TV, lead singer for a metal band, wrote and recorded their own CD's which actually got airplay, and also ran for the U.S. Senate?  Not many I bet.  Granted these things didn't blossom to the scale I wish they had been on, but I have done all these things...pretty cool if I do say so myself.

Until next time, Sportsfans....