I love this time of year beyond belief.  It reminds me of being a little kid looking forward to Christmas morning when I actually thought Santa Clause left me presents.  I love remembering that time of never being able to sleep and staring at the clock counting down the minutes until I could wake my parents up.  That's why even though I live by myself, I have a tree up and lights all over my front yard.  And what can possibly sum up this time of year better than the threat of a lawsuit...I can't think of anything, can you?  Yes, someone got all offended in Seattle that the airport had Christmas trees (of course the airport called them "Holiday Trees") on display.  A certain Jewish rabbi named Elazar Bogomilsky threatened to sue the airport if they didn't put up a menorah.  So what did the airport do?  Oh they caved in, of course, and just took down all the "holiday" trees because we all know how offensive a tree with lights on it can be.  I used to have an idea of my dream job, and that was to be able to do whatever I wanted while somehow large sums of cash appeared in my bank account every week, but now I have another dream job I want.  I want to be the person in the position that some guy like this rabbi comes to complain to, I really do.  You know what I would tell him?  I'd tell him "Fine, go ahead and sue you baby", and then I'd have to mock him while talking in baby talk like "Awwww....wuts a madder...do duh widdle twees wif balls and wights offend you?  Do you need me to call your mommy?  Can I get you some widdle kweenex to cry into?"  Oh believe me, I would.  Sure I'd get fired but who cares because it would be worth losing a job to tell this jerk what a cry-baby he is.  And now the news today is that the rabbi is getting hate mail and angry phone calls about this because the airport removed the "holiday" trees (which goes to PROVE that just because you use the term "holiday tree" people will STILL be offended and cry like babies).  His attorney said the rabbi was "saddened" that the trees were removed, because after all, he only wanted to was a menorah installed and a CEREMONY TO LIGHT IT!  Does anyone else see how stupid this is?  For example, at my job there are some Christmas decorations up.  They weren't put up as part of a ceremony or anything close, and this is a private business that the public just can't come strolling through.  So a few airport workers put up a few trees, and now some rabbi wants to have a big ceremony to light a menorah.  Give me a break.  The airport removed the trees because they stated the airport is not a place for a ceremony, and they don't want to deal with a lawsuit.  Yeah, it's NOT a place for a ceremony, but I would have taken it to court.  Screw these people...I'm sick of it.  I have crap force-fed to me all day that I don't agree with, but because I'm a white male who happens to also be a conservative Christian, I'm a closed-minded religious-zealot bigot and am basically told to accept it and be open minded.  So it's wrong if this rabbi is offended, but because I happen to be part of the MAJORITY of Americans, it's ok if I get offended.  I'm sorry I'm not enlightened.  Maybe one day I'll be more accepting of things I disagree with and learn to embrace it.  I don't get it...if I'm supposed to be ok with gay marriage, illegal immigrants getting a free ride, and be understanding of why a bunch of cockroaches in the middle-east want to cut our heads off, is it too much to ask for someone to NOT be bothered by a friggin' tree???  I'm sorry I'm such a bigot.  Good thing that the airport put the trees back up because the rabbi was sick of all the angry emails and phone calls, so he asked them to put it all back up.  Hopefully he realizes what a crybaby he was being.

In fact, seeing how I'm such a hate-monger, I decided to go see the new movie by everyone's favorite Jew hater this weekend - "Apocalypto".  The previews for it intrigued me, and when I read a bunch of reviews on Friday, I decided to go see it.  I hate critics because most are way to "artsy" for my taste, so I like reading reviews by regular Joe's.  I saw two types of reviews.  There were those who loved the film and thought it was great, and then there were those who HATED it (most admitted they didn't even see it) because Mel Gibson hates Jews and the Mayans were portrayed as savages.  Oh I know, how could the Mayans POSSIBLY be portrayed as savages when they are looked upon as such as an enlightened and intellectual culture?  It could only be done by someone with an agenda.  After all, Mel Gibson hates Jews, so his next plan of attack was to show the world that the Mayans were savages because he's also anti-mayanic.  Yep, the way the Mayans are moving into this country, we needed a movie to show everyone just what these Mayans are all about, and thankfully Mel Gibson did it!!!  Hahahaha...I crack myself up sometimes.  Seriously, let's say the Mayans were this peace-loving race that never hurt anyone, ok?  What possible purpose would there be by showing them a different way?  It's not like their some force today...that was hundreds of years ago...so what agenda could there be?  Well, I like to deal with something called "fact", and historical "fact" shows that yes, the Mayans did have many intellectual and scientific advancements, but they also were known for sacrificing people captured from other tribes to their gods, and this included skinning people alive and wearing their skin during these sacrifices.  It's the same kind of revisionist history when people talk about American Indians.  People like to speak about them like they were just living among nature in peace before the evil Europeans got here, when FACT shows quite the opposite.  There were tribes that would actually target the women and children of an enemy tribe to try and wipe out future generations.  And how about slavery?  The TV series "Roots" wants to make it look like the evil white man was riding around Africa on horseback rounding up slaves in nets.  However the FACT is that the slaves bought were sold into slavery by their own people as part of the great trade triangle.  Now I am not saying slavery was good by ANY means...but the FACT is rival tribes would sell captured people into slavery...that's just the way it was.  And the Civil War?  It wasn't fought over slavery...only 2% of all people in the South owned slaves.  If only 2% owned them, why would the other 98% fight for the elite?  It was all about state's rights...it just so happens that slavery was one of the bigger issues that the federal government was imposing on the states...it was FAR from the only reason southern states seceded from the Union.  Oh I know, now I'm a real hate-monger because of the way I'm talking about slavery.  It was wrong, but it happened, I just wish the FACTS were taught about it.  Anyway, I went to go see "Apocalypto" and it was unreal.  Now you should know by now all my horror stories about theaters and how the smallest thing can ruin the experience.  Well, something happened this time, of course, however the movie wasn't ruined because I actually found perverse enjoyment in what happened.  I was privileged to have Captain Obvious sitting behind me who felt the need to explain every excruciating detail about what was going on to his wife.  For example, in one scene the main character is fleeing the Mayans and climbs up into a tree to hide.  He turns his head and sees a baby panther, which is followed by a large growl on the other side of him and he turns to see a mother panther.  So what does Captain Obvious have to say?  This is about literally word for word - "One thing you never want to do is threaten a baby panther because the mothers are very protective".  Gee, really?  I had absolutely no idea.  Thanks for the helpful tip when I venture out into the jungle, otherwise I would have picked up the baby panther and started tossing it around figuring the mother would be fine with it.  Oh, and how does his wife respond?  She goes, "Oooh...really?"  Yep, Captain Obvious and Mrs. Clueless...the perfect couple.  I almost expected for the guy to turn to his wife when spears are flying at Jaguar Paw (the main character) and say "If a spear hits a person, it can go all the way through them because they have VERY sharp points".  I just started laughing to myself when he opened his mouth.  He should be featured as a commentary track on the DVD because he really explained what was going on with the insight John Madden adds to a football game.  Another great example was when the Mayans were sacrificing people to one of their gods, the guy tells his wife "Right now they're making sacrifices to their gods" to which his wife said "Oohh..", like she needed it explained because the on-screen action wasn't plain enough.  Seriously, I wondered if maybe she was blind or had some disability the way everything was being explained to her, and she seemed normal as far as I could tell.  But it didn't ruin the movie at all...I actually found it all quite humorous.  Plus, I took comfort knowing that my money had just gone to a hate-monger that hippies wanted people to boycott.  That was enough to put a smile on my face...hahaha.

On the topic of going to the movies, I am actually going to do something I have done once before in my life - go see a movie on opening night.  The last time I did was for "Rocky IV", so it's fitting that next week I'll be going to see "Rocky Balboa" on opening night.  I am looking more forward to this movie then any of the Texas Chainsaw movies or Star Wars movies...this is THE film I want to see.  To prepare, I am in the process of watching the previous five Rocky movies before I go next Wednesday.  To show you what a geek I am about Rocky movies, I went to the official movie website the other day and started going through the trivia questions.  Oh yeah, I was nailing them.  I knew how many raw eggs Rocky drank (five), I knew how much he got paid for the first fight against Apollo Creed ($150,000), and I even knew what Mickey called Rocky in the first movie when he told Rocky why he moved him out of a locker (a tomato).  Yep...geek.  I can remember the most minute detail of Rocky movies, yet someone at work can tell me how a part of the software works and I'll forget five minutes later...hahaha.

And to those who missed the NoiseCult gig last Friday at The Rutledge, you missed out.  I had an absolute blast.  It was a real stage with a drum riser and light...and I could actually hear my vocals clearly.  It was mind-blowing to me that I didn't have to scream my lungs out to hear myself.  The room sounded awesome, and all the bands kicked some ass.  And I have to say, the best lead singer in Nashville is a part of the Creeping Cruds.  Pete did vocals with us when we played that Ramones cancer benefit show a while back, and then joined up with the Cruds to be their new lead singer.  There is nobody like the guy around here.  I'm not talking about singing abilities as far as hitting notes, I'm talking about a lead singer who gets the crowd worked up and actually has stage presence.  He does what a lead singer is supposed to do and that is get the crowd and the band all on the same page.  I love playing gigs with those guys just so I can watch the show because with Pete doing what he does, it's never boring.  Too many bands I've seen have a singer who tries to hard to be cool and all that.  Pete is just himself and cuts loose and doesn't give a crap.  Of course I'm the second best lead singer in Nashville, but because I have to play bass also, I don't have the freedom Pete has...hahaha.  Seriously though, I got a great compliment last week when someone said my vocals sounded like a mix of Gene Simmons and Glenn Danzig.  Yeah, I'll take that as a HUGE compliment.

Hey, guess what...it's only a couple of weeks away from the year-end awards!  It is THE awards show of the year and I haven't even started to think of the winners yet...haha.  But next week you can expect a full write-up of "Rocky Balboa" and I'm sure I'll be all sentimental and sappy considering my favorite movie franchise will be coming to a close.