Yes, it's that time of year where food is plentiful.  Thanksgiving was a feast with lots of leftovers, companies have "holiday" parties with tons of food, people are always bringing food to work for everyone to eat, the "holiday" parties (and of course I use that word "holiday" quite sarcastically) with huge spreads, then of course Christmas time with family and friends which is filled with tons of food, then New Year's parties with plenty of food...and we wonder why we pack on the pounds this time of year.  Well never fear sportsfans, because yours truly has the answer on how to shed those pounds quickly.  Don't read the articles in Good Housekeeping or Cosmopolitan on how to get rid of those holiday pounds, just follow my plan and you will have success.  So what is it?  It's quite simple - all you have to do is get your city to ban trans-fats in restaurants!!!  Yes, with my plan you can still eat all you want when you go out and lose weight!  And why bother with that pesky activity called "exercise"?  Well with THIS plan you won't have to perspire one bead of sweat.  You see, I used to think that if I wanted to lose weight and eat healthy, I needed to stay away from fast-food and not stuff my face with donuts.  Oh how wrong I was.  I should have looked to the government for answers because they really know what's best for us.  Hopefully more cities will follow the actions of New York City and city councils all over America will ban trans-fats in restaurants.  Oh if only the city council of Nashville was that smart then we wouldn't have so many fat people here, and I could eat whatever I wanted without any health risks.  What a Utopia it would be!

Ok, hopefully you detected a wee bit of sarcasm by now.  I read this article today about New York City banning trans-fats and my mind couldn't fathom that there is actually a group of people who are that stupid to think that they can legislate healthy eating.  But as I read more of the article, I started to understand.  First, let me just say I have no idea what trans-fats are, what they do, and I really don't care.  Just like I have no idea what riboflavin in food does either and I'm not going to get all worked up about it.  I like to use what I call "common sense" when I eat.  Oh I know, that's pretty dangerous.  You see, I know that when I grab fast-food, it's not very healthy.  I also know that eating a box of Twinkies is probably not the best thing to do either.  And yes, sitting down with a dozen donuts and polishing them off isn't the best way to eat.  I guess I should be very thankful I am so "enlightened" to know this, because it's obvious there are those that don't.  We've already had lawsuits brought against McDonald's because people's kids are fat, and the parents obviously were tricked somehow into thinking that stuffing Big Macs down their kids' throats was a balanced and nutritious meal.  And let's not forget just how good fries and a shake are for you as well.  I can't STAND this trend of fast-food places serving salads and crap trying to appear like they give a crap about people's health.  When you go to Burger King, you're eating garbage.  Now it tastes great and does fill you up, but it's still garbage for you.  And before you think I'm some health nut, let me assure you that I do my best to keep these places in business.  I LOVE pizza, burgers, fries, all of it...but I also know I can't eat it all the time.  Again, applying common sense.  But back to the trans-fat ban.  This article had me laughing at how stupid some people are.  Here's a bit from the article I read - "Dunkin' Donuts will have to find a substitute for the 3.5 grams of trans fat in its Boston Kremes and tell customers up front that the snacks contain 240 calories".  Wow...amazing.  I had no idea that a Boston Kreme wasn't good for me...thank God the New York City council pointed this out because I would have NEVER known.  Honestly, Dunkin' Donuts should just have a sign out front that says "This stuff is bad for you and will make you fat but it tastes great!" and I think that would cover it.  Now here's the part of the article that honestly had me shaking my head at someone's stupidity.  Check this out -

Many New Yorkers also were all for the ban, saying health concerns were more important than fears of Big Brother supervising their stomachs.
"I don't care about what might be politically correct and what's not," said Murray Bader, nursing a cup of coffee at Dunkin' Donuts on Tuesday morning. "I want to live longer!".

Oh I know, it's really hard to comprehend.  This Murray Bader character acts like he's got a gun to his head forcing him into Dunkin' Donuts everyday, and now because of the ban on trans-fats, he'll live longer.  Ummm....I've got a question for Mr. Bader - Could you maybe not go to Dunkin' Donuts and stuff your face?  If you want to live longer, THEN QUIT EATING DONUTS YOU IDIOT!  So if trans-fats aren't in donuts, then donuts will all of the sudden become health food?  I don't see how an adult, which I assume Mr. Bader is, could lack the mental capacity to realize donuts are bad for you without the government telling him they are.  Does he have some psychological condition where he HAS to eat donuts???  That's the only thing I can think of, because apparently he can't stop eating them and needs the government to step in.  Want another example of complete stupidity?  Check this out from the article -

Kathy Ramirez, a 26-year-old New York mother who takes her toddler to McDonald's every week, approves of New York's new restaurant rules.
"It's hurting us, all this fat, but the kids really like it," said Ramirez, pointing to 3-year-old Amber, who had just finished her dinner. "It would be better to know what we're getting."

Better to know what they're getting???  She doesn't understand that McDonald's is junk food???  And to think, this woman is actually raising a child.  Of COURSE the kids like it...it tastes good!  That doesn't mean you have to keep taking your kid somewhere for junk food.  It's not like the McDonald's CEO is holding a family member hostage and is threatening to kill them unless you take your kid to eat junk.  She might as well have said "I'm glad this rule is in place because I'm a complete idiot and have no clue what to do to feed my child a decent meal".

Let me sum this up - if you sit on the couch watching TV every night while devouring pizzas and Whoppers, you'll get fat.  If you eat fairly healthy and exercise some, you'll lose weight.  Like I said, I have no clue what this trans-fat thing is and I don't care.  In fact, it wouldn't surprise me if in a couple of years "scientists" came out and said that certain levels of trans-fats are good for you.  Isn't that how it always happens?  All these studies are done where if you eat something you'll start bleeding from your eyes, and then a few years later another study shows that certain levels of said substance may be good for you.  I noticed tonight when I went to the grocery store that the bags of microwave chicken I always buy had in BIG BOLD letters on the bag "CONTAINS 0 TRANS-FATS" like it would make a difference to me.  Yeah, I was sitting there deciding between two different brands and because Tyson said they have zero trans-fats, then I bought that one...uh-huh.  I go by something called "price" when I'm shopping.  It reminds me of the whole Atkins craze.  Remember a year or so ago when it seemed like EVERY SINGLE THING outside of ho-ho's and Count Chocula seemed to boast that it was Atkins approved in some way?  Yeah, you don't see that much anymore because it was a FAD.  Oh yeah, the Atkins thing does work, you'll lose weight, but I swear it screws with you...it's just not a good way to eat.

Several years ago I was a blimp.  When I took my first desk job, I still ate the same way I did when I was on my feet all day and guess what happened, I got fat.  So what did I do?  I started to eat better and exercise and guess what happened...I lost a lot of weight.  I'm not talking about a few pounds either...I was FAT.  Right now I'm a hair over 6'2" and weigh about 185.  About 8 years ago I was pushing 280.  I have no metabolism at all...I could put on 20 pounds tonight if I wanted to.  Before I took that first office job I weighed about 210...but an "in-shape" 210 because I was working out a lot.  After about 6 months at the new job, I saw a company photo where my gut was hanging over my belt and figured "huh...I'm really fat...maybe I should do something about it" so I did.  It's not easy, but nothing you really want to do ever is.  Look, if you're fat and don't care, that's cool and more power to you.  Just me personally, I wanted to lose the weight.  I know how hard it is, believe me I do, because I think pizza is nature's perfect food and could eat it 24/7.  I knew what was bad for me and what was good for me, and I didn't need some city council banning anything to help.

So there you go...to shed those holiday pounds just get your local city council to ban trans-fats.  I bet about 6 months after this goes into effect, people in New York will look like those starving people in Ethiopia...no one will even recognize them.  Go ahead...eat all the donuts you want and LOSE WEIGHT!  I'm just so glad we allow governments to take care of us because we can't understand junk food is bad for us.