�Baby, you can�t do this anymore. You know that don�t you? You know you have been a brat for too long, out of control and unpleasant to be around. I love you Julie and I�m not going to let this continue. You can accept this punishment or not, its up to you baby, its up to you.� He didn�t sound angry, he sounded sad. The tone of his voice sparked more tears as I nodded my acquiescence. Yes, I needed and deserved this. Yes I had been out of control. Yes. Yes. To all of it yes.
The hand on my back slide down and held me down to his lap. His other hand I couldn�t feel or see. I whimpered again, this time in real fear. Fear of pain, fear that the reality would be so different from the fantasies I had had of being spanked. Of being held accountable for my actions finally.
�You know that expression �it will hurt me more than it will hurt you�? Not true baby, this is going to hurt you a lot. I have the feeling this is the only way you will learn.� I heard him inhale and I tensed, my hands clenching into fists. My world exploded into hot red pain, the sharp pain felt like it was all through me and not just centered on my ass. It took all of my willpower to not reach back with my hands and cover myself as I cried.
Again and again, I lost track. I was lost in a haze of pain, his left hand holding me down and his right hand bringing that paddle down on me. I cried harder when he stopped, his fingertips gently traced over my throbbing skin. He leaned down and blew gently on the inflamed skin making me lift to him. His hand gently patted me, lovingly now. His hand stroked until the fire abated and only a deep warm glow was left. I was cried out, lying over his lap. Drained of anger and tears. His voice seemed very far away as he spoke.
�Stand up Julie, please.� His hand lifted me, helped me stand up on shaky legs. I was too embarrassed to look at him, my husband who just spanked me. And so hard too! I looked down to see his hand tug at the drawstring, loosening them. I wriggled to help him, and they slid down my legs to land in a puddle. The cool air felt nice on my ass, cool and soft. I finally looked up at him shyly. Looking at his face for the first time since his hand disciplined me.
As earlier that evening he used his thumbs to gently wipe my tears.
�Back over my lap Julie, I am not done yet with you� His voice was stern but his eyes were loving. Or I couldn�t have done it again, my ass felt like it was on fire and my legs could barely hold me up. As I lay back down over his lap I had such a curious feeling of relief. Of being safe.