Ten signs that your child is the son of Satan

10. He just won't stop gnawing on his sister whenever they are alone.
9. His horns keep poking holes in the baseball caps you buy him.
8. His first word is "REDRUM".
7. You've accidentally slammed his tail in the car door more than once.
6. Other children that play with him sometimes suddenly turn to salt.
5. He will only eat pea soup.
4. Churches suddenly burst into flames whenever you and your son walk by.
3. Portals opening in to the seventh layer of hell are a common occurance in your house.
2. Your child has exactly 666 hairs on his head.
1. He insists that you address him as Dark Lord Damian

"Ten things..." is a Copyright of Peter J. Duquette, so if you print, copy or take this document, make sure to include this last line to confirm that you aren't trying to claim it as your own.