Ten signs that you are too damn ugly

10. After you were born, your parents were charged with littering.
9. People hunt you for the fur on your back.
8. Your reflection wears a paper bag.
7. Shops that sell mirrors forbid you from looking at the merchandise.
6. Wart Hogs find you attractive.
5. Your friends think you celebrate halloween every day.
4. There are censored dots in front of your face in family photos.
3. Your family makes you eat dinner in the dark.
2. Star Trek fanatics keep telling you to take you to your home planet.
1. Your name is listed at the bottom of the food chain.

"Ten things..." is a Copyright of Peter J. Duquette, so if you print, copy or take this document, make sure to include this last line to confirm that you aren't trying to claim it as your own.