| Fuck You November 3, 2002 I wrote this as a letter to my best friend. Okay, I'm not gonna act like I'm not pissed cause then I would just be lying. I know your pissed at me as well, but what have I done? I haven' done a fucking thing. I knew this time would come where he'd be back in your life and you'd just ignore me like I was nothing. You don't understand what I'm saying though, so don't act like you fuking do. I feel like shit, like your back up, when he's not there you know I will be. I feel like you're taking me for granted. Are you ever going to realize what your putting me through? I thought we were best friends, but we're not even close. I have someone else that actually cares about me more than you ever will. You don't even care, do you? We never talk about our emotions and the way we feel about the things that are going on. I fucking need that! I need to talk about stuff, makes me feel better. I need you, but obviously you don't need me. That hurts. Almost ten years and we're just throwing it down the drain. I've tried though. I can honestly say that I've tried. For once there was actually something worth trying for. Nothings working... I'm giving up on us, our friendship. Wait... what friendship? I wouldn't call this a fucking friendship. Oh my god, I can't believe I actually trusted you again. What was I thinking? Thanks to you I can't even trust myself. You always hurt me in the end. I can't take anymore. You've already broken me, how much damage do you plan on causing me? Why are you afraid of having a deep conversation with me? I don't understand why you never tell me how you feel. I asked you once, maybe twice if you wish we were closer and you just ignored me. That hurt so much. I take it the answer was no. I could've cried right on the spot. Fuck... I just wanna S C R E A M ! ! ! But even if I did you wouldn't hear me. I take it you haven't even read my poems, so that's why I'm writing you this so you can get it through your thick fucking head. People have been asking me lately who they're about cause they're really violent. And they ask me if I'm feeling ok. They all think I'm fucking crazy. Am i? I am! What the fuck am I supposed to say to them? What? I can't control myself anymore, I'm losing my grip. I'm gonna snap. TOO LATE!!! You just need to listen to me, just L I S T E N ! Please listen to what I'm trying to say, just once. If you didn't get anything I've said, just get this... It's over, we're done, we're through... I can't this anymore... F U C K Y O U ! ! ! Do you understand yet? I didn't think so, you always think it's all okay... |
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