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Lifetime Goals



Okie. I've noticed that everyone has a goals page. And I need content. So. Voila. Goals page. No real order, btw. (I haven't updated this in forever so..)



  1. Force Jess to move down here.
  2. Find money for drums.
  3. Learn drums!
  4. Stop father from murdering Jess. When she shows up and hugs him.
  5. That's my job.
  6. Keep our plans secret.
  7. Get an apartment with Jess and Bianca when I turn 16.
  8. Pick out an apartment that everyone likes.
  9. Check future apartment for any gas leaks in Jess's room. Or any close gas lines.
  10. Pick out MY own furniture.
  11. Convince Jess to let me bring unlimited kittens
  12. ..Hope Jess doesn't read that.
  13. Shove kitties in clothing box and bring them to the apartment anyway.
  14. Hold Jess's Chi hostage if she doesn't let me get more animals.
  15. Hide my pets from Jess.
  16. BE ABLE TO PLAY MY DRUMS IN THE APARTMENT.
  17. Be the only one who actually cleans it.
  18. Make Jess understand we cannot eat off $50 a month. LOL.
  19. Form band with them. Me be the drummer.
  20. Make ...the band... roxor.
  21. ...Be come rich from the roxorness of ....our band. Name is confidental for now.
  22. Go 50x platinum.
  23. Everyone will love us.
  24. Ban the word poser. Anyone who says it shall be chained up under a volcano and slowly tortured.
  25. Build Barnie's Coffee in our mansion.
  26. And a McDonalds.
  27. And a Dairy Queen.
  28. And a Mrs Field's Cookie place.
  29. Hire only hot guys.
  30. Build skate ramp in backyard of mansion. Hire hot skaters to skate constantly.
  31. Marry Benji before Jess gets to him.
  32. Well. Just meet him. And Joel. They seem cool.
  33. Convince Bianca that she will perish if she doesn't move in with me and Jess.
  34. Kill every single one of The Donnas. They cannot take our spot.
  35. Maybe I'll just hire hitmen.
  36. Stop Flinchy from going to the mall everyday.
  37. Speaking of which. Ban Bianca from ever seeing Flinchy again.
  38. That means she has the break the 'promise'.
  39. Kill Ja Rule. Goddamnint, that guy is so annoying.
  40. Visit California and try out that mating ritual.
  41. Find out how one can have 35 testicles.
  42. Get my dad a tranquilizer.
  43. Get my eyebrow and ears pierced. Well. My ears again.
  44. Sterilize Bianca.
  45. Keep Corey away from Bianca.
  46. Well. If she's sterilized I suppose it doesn't matter.
  47. Nevermind. It does.
  48. Meet Ben Affleck...No.
  49. ..No. Own Ben Affleck. Strap him to rollie chair and roll him around future mansion and pass him around. Make him live in my closet.
  50. Also buy JLo. Send her with the poser saying people. I'm not wasting money on her.
  51. Buy Coca-Cola
  52. Frito-Lay too. Dun let Jess find out about it, though.
  53. Ban the 'words' "u", "ur", "ttyl", "lylas", "r".. ect.
  54. Figure out the right way to say ect. Or etc. Er.
  55. Ban all retarded dating shows. I.e: BlindDate, Elimidate, Ship something or other.
  56. Remove every hair from my body. Permanently. Except from head.
  57. Make my friggin bangs grow faster. Finish growing out that is.
  58. Let Bianca not touch my keyboard.
  59. Find more movies with Ben as a gay stripper in.
  60. TEACH PEOPLE TO FUCKING SPELL WOLF.
  61. Learn why the apartment needs gas.
  62. Swim in the carwash.
  63. Ban words moist, tasty and straddle.
  64. *shudder*
  65. Get every movie channel there is.
  66. In every language.
  67. See Sum Of All Fears. DAMN YOU BIANCA.
  68. Find out actual gender of Chris Taylor. o.O. Old teacher.
  69. Figure out why me and Jess's lives are so alike. And our brains. And everything. ...Yeah. Really.
  70. Find someone to goto Hot Topic with me.
  71. Make my OWN clothing line. And then buy the stuff for myself. I can never find clothes.
  72. Find out who the hell the other Danielle is.
  73. Get fastest internet connection in the world.
  74. Be able to afford it.
  75. Ban Peasant and all frilly tops. Especially from Wet Seal.
  76. Buy a lifetime supply of bacon and beef jerky.
  77. Make chicken and bacon vegetables. That way I can be a vegetarian.
  78. Make everything fat free but not taste like it.
  79. Change name to lifetime goals.
  80. Dye my hair blonde with pink steaks.
  81. Make me actually look good like that.
  82. Buy every no-kill shelter and buy all the animals their own country.
  83. Make Scooter immortal. I'd end up shooting her.
  84. ...Yeah, make me immortal, too.
  85. Re-Release Be My Lover. My way.
  86. ..Gas all of Afghanistan.
  87. Hell, all weird people like them.
  88. MAKE MY EAR STOP HURTING.
  89. ..Finish this goddamn site.
  90. Buy No-Lazy miracle pills.
  91. Wait. Invent them first.
  92. Get that Tiger/Butterfly that that chica at McDonalds had.
  93. Beat Bianca to it.
  94. Build a toilet in Bianca's room.
  95. Be able to find out the sex/age of the people you talk to online. o.O
  96. Pictures are better.
  97. Haha that was 69.
  98. BAN ALL NUMBER MEANINGS. Like. 69.
  99. Kill all ExpressJeans commercials.
  100. Make all guys hot.
  101. Re-Continue Daria.
  102. MAKE BRAD PITT SHAVE THAT. THING ON HIS NECK.Whoo.. he did.
  103. Remove Enrique's mole thing.
  104. First find out the rate it grows at.
  105. ..Wait. That'd be cool if it ate his head.
  106. Buy the government.
  107. Or just Iowa Alaska.
  108. Make everywhere have magic vents.
  109. Haha my list is longer than Jess's! Keep it that way.
  110. Find those goddamn Pound Puppy tapes.
  111. Make the all numberings on this thing bold. Whoo! Done!
  112. Make Candie cute shaved.
  113. Build Ben a shed in the backyard of our house.
  114. ..Don't share him with anyone. Sept maybe Jess. If I get my Barnie's Coffee.
  115. Give Sandy a dozen German Shepard puppies.
  116. Take Melissa to Hot Topic and prove that it exists.
  117. Buy all of Bed, Bath and Beyond Candles.
  118. Buy out Skeptic magazine and give the company to Jess.
  119. Find Samaa when we're really famous and laugh at her working at McDonalds.
  120. Find MooCow the cat when I'm super rich and buy her for $100,000.
  121. Hide Frito Lay contracts from Jess.
  122. Buy White Squall and keep replaying the part where Ryan Phillippe pisses hisself. Show everyone. That is so great.
  123. Pay for Jess's competitive counseling.
  124. Join Jess at a pool and/or golf place and be cheerleaders.
  125. Make bacon fat free.
  126. Keep list 1 shorter than Jess's. I sowwy.
  127. Rename 'Rachel's' baby from Emma to GreenJello.
  128. Go down to Ringling Art College and make them take Jess.
  129. Better yet. Handcuff myself to the dean/owner/thingie and refuse to leave until they accept her. If they dun at first. Sing Barbie Girl over and over.
  130. Buy out Circuit City. And Best Buy. AND BED BATH AND BEYOND.
  131. Correct Jess. SLURPEE MACHINE. With all flavors. In our house.
  132. Invent Vanilla Coke Slurpee!
  133. OVERTHROW JESS. 2 AGAINST ONE JESSICA LYNN. 2 AGAI..3! PLUS MY CATS. HAHAHAHAHA.
  134. Stop updating this goddamn list.
  135. Chain Jess to a rolly chair so she can't form dictatorship.
  136. ..Not for the same reason Ben is being tied to a rolly chair either.. =)
  137. Buy custom pink Leopard spotted drumset. Or Jaguar.
  138. Hope Jess doesn't get mad that I have more goals than her =| I thought she had 156.
  139. Figger out a way to hide #'s 84-this from Jess.
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