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Lifetime Goals
Okie. I've noticed that everyone has a goals page. And I need content. So. Voila. Goals page. No real order, btw. (I haven't updated this in forever so..)

- Force Jess to move down here.
- Find money for drums.
- Learn drums!
- Stop father from murdering Jess. When she shows up and hugs him.
- That's my job.
- Keep our plans secret.
- Get an apartment with Jess and Bianca when I turn 16.
- Pick out an apartment that everyone likes.
- Check future apartment for any gas leaks in Jess's room. Or any close gas lines.
- Pick out MY own furniture.
- Convince Jess to let me bring unlimited kittens
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..Hope Jess doesn't read that.
- Shove kitties in clothing box and bring them to the apartment anyway.
- Hold Jess's Chi hostage if she doesn't let me get more animals.
- Hide my pets from Jess.
- BE ABLE TO PLAY MY DRUMS IN THE APARTMENT.
- Be the only one who actually cleans it.
- Make Jess understand we cannot eat off $50 a month. LOL.
- Form band with them. Me be the drummer.
- Make ...the band... roxor.
- ...Be come rich from the roxorness of ....our band. Name is confidental for now.
- Go 50x platinum.
- Everyone will love us.
- Ban the word poser. Anyone who says it shall be chained up under a volcano and slowly tortured.
- Build Barnie's Coffee in our mansion.
- And a McDonalds.
- And a Dairy Queen.
- And a Mrs Field's Cookie place.
- Hire only hot guys.
- Build skate ramp in backyard of mansion. Hire hot skaters to skate constantly.
- Marry Benji before Jess gets to him.
- Well. Just meet him. And Joel. They seem cool.
- Convince Bianca that she will perish if she doesn't move in with me and Jess.
- Kill every single one of The Donnas. They cannot take our spot.
- Maybe I'll just hire hitmen.
- Stop Flinchy from going to the mall everyday.
- Speaking of which. Ban Bianca from ever seeing Flinchy again.
- That means she has the break the 'promise'.
- Kill Ja Rule. Goddamnint, that guy is so annoying.
- Visit California and try out that mating ritual.
- Find out how one can have 35 testicles.
- Get my dad a tranquilizer.
- Get my eyebrow and ears pierced. Well. My ears again.
- Sterilize Bianca.
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Keep Corey away from Bianca.
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Well. If she's sterilized I suppose it doesn't matter.
- Nevermind. It does.
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Meet Ben Affleck...No.
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..No. Own Ben Affleck. Strap him to rollie chair and roll him around future mansion and pass him around. Make him live in my closet.
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Also buy JLo. Send her with the poser saying people. I'm not wasting money on her.
- Buy Coca-Cola
- Frito-Lay too.
Dun let Jess find out about it, though.
- Ban the 'words' "u", "ur", "ttyl", "lylas", "r".. ect.
- Figure out the right way to say ect. Or etc. Er.
- Ban all retarded dating shows. I.e: BlindDate, Elimidate, Ship something or other.
- Remove every hair from my body. Permanently. Except from head.
- Make my friggin bangs grow faster. Finish growing out that is.
- Let Bianca not touch my keyboard.
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Find more movies with Ben as a gay stripper in.
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TEACH PEOPLE TO FUCKING SPELL WOLF.
- Learn why the apartment needs gas.
- Swim in the carwash.
- Ban words moist, tasty and straddle.
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*shudder*
- Get every movie channel there is.
- In every language.
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See Sum Of All Fears. DAMN YOU BIANCA.
- Find out actual gender of Chris Taylor. o.O. Old teacher.
- Figure out why me and Jess's lives are so alike. And our brains. And everything. ...Yeah. Really.
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Find someone to goto Hot Topic with me.
- Make my OWN clothing line. And then buy the stuff for myself. I can never find clothes.
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Find out who the hell the other Danielle is.
- Get fastest internet connection in the world.
- Be able to afford it.
- Ban Peasant and all frilly tops. Especially from Wet Seal.
- Buy a lifetime supply of bacon and beef jerky.
- Make chicken and bacon vegetables. That way I can be a vegetarian.
- Make everything fat free but not taste like it.
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Change name to lifetime goals.
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Dye my hair blonde with pink steaks.
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Make me actually look good like that.
- Buy every no-kill shelter and buy all the animals their own country.
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Make Scooter immortal. I'd end up shooting her.
- ...Yeah, make me immortal, too.
- Re-Release Be My Lover. My way.
- ..Gas all of Afghanistan.
- Hell, all weird people like them.
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MAKE MY EAR STOP HURTING.
- ..Finish this goddamn site.
- Buy No-Lazy miracle pills.
- Wait. Invent them first.
- Get that Tiger/Butterfly that that chica at McDonalds had.
- Beat Bianca to it.
- Build a toilet in Bianca's room.
- Be able to find out the sex/age of the people you talk to online. o.O
- Pictures are better.
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Haha that was 69.
- BAN ALL NUMBER MEANINGS. Like. 69.
- Kill all ExpressJeans commercials.
- Make all guys hot.
- Re-Continue Daria.
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MAKE BRAD PITT SHAVE THAT. THING ON HIS NECK.Whoo.. he did.
- Remove Enrique's mole thing.
- First find out the rate it grows at.
- ..Wait. That'd be cool if it ate his head.
- Buy the government.
- Or just
Iowa Alaska.
- Make everywhere have magic vents.
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Haha my list is longer than Jess's! Keep it that way.
- Find those goddamn Pound Puppy tapes.
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Make the all numberings on this thing bold. Whoo! Done!
- Make Candie cute shaved.
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Build Ben a shed in the backyard of our house.
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..Don't share him with anyone. Sept maybe Jess. If I get my Barnie's Coffee.
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Give Sandy a dozen German Shepard puppies.
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Take Melissa to Hot Topic and prove that it exists.
- Buy all of Bed, Bath and Beyond Candles.
- Buy out Skeptic magazine and give the company to Jess.
- Find Samaa when we're really famous and laugh at her working at McDonalds.
- Find MooCow the cat when I'm super rich and buy her for $100,000.
- Hide Frito Lay contracts from Jess.
- Buy White Squall and keep replaying the part where Ryan Phillippe pisses hisself. Show everyone. That is so great.
- Pay for Jess's competitive counseling.
- Join Jess at a pool and/or golf place and be cheerleaders.
- Make bacon fat free.
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Keep list 1 shorter than Jess's. I sowwy.
- Rename 'Rachel's' baby from Emma to GreenJello.
- Go down to Ringling Art College and make them take Jess.
- Better yet. Handcuff myself to the dean/owner/thingie and refuse to leave until they accept her. If they dun at first. Sing Barbie Girl over and over.
- Buy out Circuit City. And Best Buy. AND BED BATH AND BEYOND.
- Correct Jess. SLURPEE MACHINE. With all flavors. In our house.
- Invent Vanilla Coke Slurpee!
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OVERTHROW JESS. 2 AGAINST ONE JESSICA LYNN. 2 AGAI..3! PLUS MY CATS. HAHAHAHAHA.
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Stop updating this goddamn list.
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Chain Jess to a rolly chair so she can't form dictatorship.
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..Not for the same reason Ben is being tied to a rolly chair either.. =)
- Buy custom pink Leopard spotted drumset. Or Jaguar.
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Hope Jess doesn't get mad that I have more goals than her =| I thought she had 156.
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Figger out a way to hide #'s 84-this from Jess.
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