The Lumberjack !!!
yo
Ah, the joy of woodworking. The sun on your skin, the summer breeze in your face, and the fresh smell of lumber. Never mind the fact that you're about to demolish your $60 deck out of sheer disgust with every last aspect of your lousy life. The Lumberjack is not a move designed for a bad day of skating. It does, however, require a bad day of skating as a catalyst for one of the ultimate freak-outs. Don't even consider using this move unless your day has included at least one of the following: a death in the family, detention at school, or a girlfriend that dumped you for your best stupid friend. a.) Make sure you're good and bummed before you go skating, and pick a crappy spot to add that little extra something. Throw some gravel on the ground if you can't find a suitable spot. After one or two bails, begin to convince yourself that you suck and there are no two ways around it. Let the pressure build. Try to land primo and slam on your chest. b.) Chase your board down like a cheetah running down a gazelle. You might want to spit at it and yell dirty words out loud for style points. c.) Grab it by the nose or tail, whichever is most comfortable, run to the nearest corner of a building or ledge, and proceed to use your board like an axe designed for cutting down trees of brick and mortar. Grit your teeth and swing with all you've got. Chop away, and don't stop until your board is severed in two bits, held together only by the last shreds of griptape. Your friends will get a good kick out of it, and you'll be comfortable in the knowledge that you just successfully freaked out.
