A Tribute to Hanan

 

It was a handshake that sealed our commitment.  I remember going to meet my bosom friend Hanan for lunch, all excited about a new idea to write a book on taking care of ourselves, a handbook for us mid-life women and men, helping us stay healthy and happy.  I even made the outline of the book, and started the first chapter entitled Turning 50.  Serendipity or not, I know for sure that had I not taken the leave of absence from 25 years of scientific medical research at the University of Toronto, I would never have searched deeper into what makes me happy and fulfilled, or found the time, energy and boldness to write this book.

 

Hanan could be described as a warrior, intellect, human right defender, and at heart a highlander with a dream to write a novel about Scotland.  We spent hours and hours discussing everything from good and bad fatty acids, to fitness needs, to world political situations.  We kept questioning and debating about our careers, our relationships, finances, daily stresses and "older" diseases.  Unconsciously, we slowly progressed into talking about our definite need to take care of ourselves, the desire to smell the roses, to relax, explore new career ideas, and not be afraid to take new bold steps.  That was the seed of this book.

 

During that March lunch, I asked Hanan if she would write the book with me.  She said "Yes".  Then she said: "Let's shake hands".  The rest of the lunch was sheer adrenalin, new ideas were pouring out, we practically made the whole questionnaire up so that we could research the market and feel whether others shared our thoughts.

 

Much before the book idea was born, that spring I planned my trip to Bosnia.  Hanan was scheduled for a small operation, and she was even looking forward to using the two days recovery time to start on another chapter.  Several days after the operation, she was at her desk when the telephone rang, and the doctor told her that she had an advanced cancer.  The shock, the pain, the disbelief,...

 

On Pentacostal Sunday in May, I was in Sarajevo.  My family and I went to the Church on the Hill, run by nuns, who during the turmoil of war, amidst bombing and threats of bombs, kept their school open, teaching children of all religions: Catholic, Muslim, Jewish and East Orthodox.  I remember making a pledge that if we ever finish and publish our book we would make donations to their school.

 

When I came back, we kept working with the best of our capabilities.  The book became the burden, the bond, the strength, the blessing, and the spirit.  Hanan died six months later. To the very end, discussion about our book had a magical power to lift her spirit.

 

Two years after our covenant hand-shake, and after getting rejected by several publishers, I learned in the "TIME" magazine about Fatbrain.com and possibilities for publishing on the Web.  I did it.  We did it.  I know Hanan is happy and smiling.

 

About Authors

 

S.Julia Huterer, B.sc., Ph.D., is a senior research neuroscientist at the University of Toronto.  She is the author of twenty-four scientific papers, and has contributed various chapters to three books.  She is a mother, wife, caregiver, volunteer and an entrepreneur.

 

Hanan Al-Mijalli, BA (Sociology), MA (Education) is a teacher and the University of Toronto administrator.  She is also a turning 50 mother, wife, community activist, volunteer and a friend.