Ross: Do you have a minute? I'd like to talk with you about something I'm really uncomfortable talking about.
Joey: Sure. How about, uh, you showering with your mom?
Ross: I actually had a topic in mind.

Monica: I still don't get why Brad and Jenny would give us a fake number.
Joey: You know, if they knew what they were doing, they probably didn't give you real names, either.
Monica: Okay, maybe people give out fake numbers, but they don't give out fake names.
Joey: Oh yeah? [to Phoebe] Hi, Ken Adams. Nice to meet ya.
Phoebe: Regina Phelange.

Chandler: I just don't get it. We didn't do anything wrong!
Monica: I know. Although you did tell an awful lot of jokes.
Chandler: I thought you said those jokes were funny! Joke, joke, joke, joke!
Monica: Joke, joke, blah, blah!
Chandler: Well maybe it was all of your questions.
Monica: What was wrong with my questions?
Chandler:The sheer volume. It was like flying with The Riddler.
Monica: I'm sorry, was that another joke?
Chandler: Was that another question?

Rachel: Clearly you don't want people to see this tape. Now, I don't want people to see it either. But you so badly don't want people to see it that it makes me want to see it. Do you see?

On tape:
Ross: Hey, remember... remember the night they got engaged? How you and I almost...
Rachel: Oh, I remember how we almost.... Do you think we would have gone through with it? You know, if we hadn't gotten caught? I mean, do you think we would've done it?
Ross: Well, I mean, I know I wanted to. I just... I just wasn't sure if you wanted to.
Rachel: Oh, I wanted to.
Ross: So we... we both wanted to.
Rachel: Interesting.
Ross: Mm. Anyway, um, it probably worked out for the best.
Rachel: Yeah, sure.
While watching the tape:
Rachel: Okay, in about ten seconds you're going to see him kiss me.
Ross: And in about five seconds, you're going to see why.
On tape:
Rachel: Ross, have I ever told you about the time I went back-packing through western Europe?
While watching the tape:
Rachel: Okay, get ready to see some begging!
Pheobe: Oh, you came on to Ross!
Rachel: What?
Ross: Now I'm so happy.
Rachel: What are you talking about?
Monica: You used the Europe story!
Chandler: That's the magic story you use when you want to have sex!
Rachel: How do you know about that story?
Joey: How do you know about that story?
Rachel: I heard it from my friend Irene, who heard it from some guy!
Joey (raising his hand, pointing to himself): Some guy!
Rachel: No, no, she told me that his name was Ken Adams.
Joey (raising his hand, pointing to himself): Ken Adams!

Ross: Oh, there... there go the clothes.
Rachel: You are undressing awfully quickly.
Ross: Six months, Rachel, six months.
Both: Ah. Huh. Hey!
Ross: We look... we look pretty good!
Rachel: I was gonna say!
Ross: Whoa, nice tan!
Rachel: Thank you. I had just gone to the beach that weekend.
Ross: Ah.
Rachel: Oh, have you been working out?
Ross: I had been working out.
Rachel: Well, this is so much better that I ever...
Both: Oh! Ew!
Ross: Oh, that's not pretty!