Rachel: Technical question. How do you know when, uh, the butter is done?
Monica: Well, it's done about 2 minutes before it looks like that.

Phoebe: He used to be just, "Jack Gellar: Monica and Ross's Dad," and now he's... he's, "Jack Gellar: Dream hunk."
Rachel: I don't know. You know, to me he'll always be, "Jack Gellar: Walks in while you're changing."

Rachel: Joey, your apartment is like 100 degrees!
Joey: Did it make you want to walk around in your underwear?
Rachel: No.
Joey: Still not hot enough!

Ross: Okay, okay. I'll tell them that it wasn't Chandler who got high. Now, who should I say it was?
Monica: You! It's not like it's a big deal. You... you don't still do it, or anything.
Ross: All right, all right. Now... now, who should I say "tricked" me into doing it?

Chandler: This is so good that I'm going to enjoy it on the balcony, so that I can enjoy the view whilst I enjoy my dessert.

Phoebe: I dreamt that we were going to get married, and he left because he had to go fight a fire. And, um, so, okay, I went to a nightclub, and I saw him making out with a girl.
Rachel: Oh my God, he dream cheated on you!
Phoebe: Yeah. But then Jacques Cousteau came and he kicked his ass for betraying me. It was so cool! Then he took me diving, and he introduced me to his pet seahorse, who, by the way, was totally coming on to me, and please, that is not going to happen.

Mrs. Geller [to Ross]: It was you?
Monica: And Dad, you know that mailman you got fired? He didn't steal your Playboys. Ross did!
Ross: Yeah, well hurricane Gloria didn't break the porch swing. Monica did!
Monica: Ross hasn't worked at the museum for a year!
Ross: Monica and Chandler are living together!
Monica: Ross married Rachel in Vegas and got divorced... again!
Phoebe: I love Jacques Cousteau!
Rachel: I wasn't supposed to put beef in the trifle!
Joey: I wanna go!
Mrs. Geller: That's a lot of information to get in 30 seconds.