Ross: Look, I just don't want my tombstone to read, "Ross Gellar, Three Divorces."
Phoebe: Don't be worried about that! Your tombstone can say whatever you want it to say! It could say, "Ross Geller, Good at Marriage!" You know? Mine's gonna say, "Phoebe Buffay, Buried Alive."

Monica: Okay, listen umm, Chandler and I are going to live together. Here.
Rachel: Oh my God! That's so great! I'm so happy for you guys!
Monica: Really?
Rachel: And that was so sweet of you to ask! Oh my God, the three of us are gonna have such a good time living together!

Rachel: Oh! This is so exciting! Oh! [singing:] Come and knock on my door...
Monica: [singing:] We'll be waiting for you...

Ross: This is crazy! I mean, yes... yes, Rachel is my good friend and I... I have loved her in the past. But now she is just my wife! Phoebe, will you... will you help me out here?
Phoebe: Well, I thought you loved her when you... when you married her.
Ross: We were drunk! I would've married, uh, Joey with that amount of alcohol!
Phoebe: Hey! You could do a lot worse than Joey Tribbiani!

Joey: Come on! It's like the end of an era! No more J-man and Channy!
Chandler: Okay, I gotta ask. Who calls us that?

Ross: This was just a drunken mistake and I need to get it annulled.
Russell: I see. Have you considered therapy?
Ross: I think just the annulment for today.
Russell: There are a couple of forms to fill out.
Ross: Easy.
Russell: And we'll need to have witnesses who can testify that you were not of, uh, sound mind.
Ross: No problem!
Russell: And we'll need you and Rachel to testify before a judge.
Ross: Ooo! There's no way to do this without her? 'Cause I kinda all ready told her, uh, it was... it was taken care of.
Russell: Of course you did. Look Ross, you can't get an annulment unless you and Rachel are both there.
Ross: Uh-ha. What about someone who looks like Rachel? I will think about the therapy.

Joey: So, Ross and Rachel got married, Monica and Chandler almost got married, do you think you and I should hook up?
Phoebe: Oh, we do, but not just yet.
Joey: Really? Well, when?
Phoebe: Okay, um, well, first Chandler and Monica will get married--and become filthy rich by the way. Yeah. But it won't work out.
Joey: Wow.
Phoebe: I know. Then, I'm gonna marry Chandler--for the money--and you'll marry Rachel and have the beautiful kids.
Joey: Great!
Phoebe: But then we ditch those two, and that's when we get married. We'll have Chandler's money and Rachel's kids, and getting custody will be easy because of Rachel's drinking problem.
Joey: Uh oh. What about Ross?
Phoebe: I don't want to go into the whole thing, but, um, we have words and I kill him.