Rachel: She is so cute! You could fit her right in your little pocket!
Joey: I don't know. I mean, I like her a lot, and she's really nice, but...
Monica: But what?
Joey: She keeps punching me.
Monica: In that cute, little, sweet way she just did?
Joey: Hey, it's a lot harder than it looks! Okay? She... she's hurting me.
Monica: I know what you need! You need a bodyguard. Hey, Ross, what is Ben doing after preschool?

Phoebe: I mean, all I'm saying is don't judge Ross before you get to know him, all right? I mean, I like all you guys now, but when I first meet you.... You know, Kurt, I thought, you know, abrasive drunk. Um, Lola? Mind numbingly stupid. And, okay, you guys: Gold-digger; cradle robbing perv. So, I think you all know what I mean.
Phoebe: Obviously, I didn't think they were gonna start throwing things. I just thought if I kept insulting everyone, you would jump in and defend everyone, and then you could look like the hero.
Ross: Oh, wow, yeah! See, I did not get that.

Chandler: Will you marry me?
Ross: Oh no. No. No.
Joey: What a bad idea!
Rachel: Oh... I can't not look at it!
Monica: Chandler, why are you doing this?
Chandler: I don't know. But I know I'm not afraid to do this.
Monica: Chandler.
Chandler: I'm doing this because I'm sorry?
Monica: Do you, um, you really think the best reason to get married is because you're sorry?
Chandler: No, the best reason to get married is pregnancy. Sorry is pretty much fourth. You know, behind being ready, and actually wanting to get married.

Chandler: I was really confused and then I talked to these guys.
Monica: Who? Two-divorces, and Joey?
Ross: Hey!
Joey: She's right you know.
Ross: Yeah, but still, cheap shot!

Monica: What would you have done if I had said yes?
Chandler: Well, I would've been happy, because I would've be able to spend the rest of my life with the woman that I love. Or, you would've seen a Chandler shaped hole in that door.