Joey: Ross! Ross, listen! Who are you kissing at midnight, huh? Rachel or Phoebe?
Ross: What?
Joey: Well you gotta kiss someone. Can't kiss your sister.
Ross: Well, who's gonna kiss my sister?
Joey: Chandler.
Ross: Aw, man! Really?
Joey: Dude, dude! Who would you rather have kiss your sister, me or Chandler?
Ross: That's a good point.
Joey: Yeah.
Ross: Oh well, since I have that whole history with Rachel, I guess Phoebe.
Joey: Okay, great!
Ross: All right.
Joey: Pheebs! Pheebs! Listen, Ross wants to kiss you at midnight!
Phoebe: It's so obvious, why doesn't he just ask?
Joey: Rach! Rach! Listen, I'm gonna kiss you at midnight.
Rachel: What?!
Ross: Well, everyone's gotta kiss someone. You can't kiss Ross you got the history.
Rachel: So?
Joey: So? Who would you rather have kissing you, me or Chandler?
Rachel: Oh, good point.

Ross: You know what? I'm gonna go out on a limb and say no divorces in '99!
Rachel: But your divorce isn't even final yet.
Ross: Just the one divorce in '99! You know what, I am gonna be happy this year. I am gonna make myself happy.
Chandler: Do you want us to leave the room? Or...

Phoebe: Okay, lesson one: chords. Now, I don't know the actual names of the chords, umm, but I... I made up names for the way my hand looks while I'm doing them. So then, this is, "Bear Claw." Okay, umm, "Turkey Leg" and... "Old Lady."

Ross: They're still not coming on, man! Aand the lotion and the powder have made a paste!
Joey: Really? Uh, what color is it?
Ross: What difference does that make?!
Joey: Well, I'm just... If the paste matches the pants, you can make yourself a pair of paste pants and she won't know the difference!

Chandler: Okay, I can't take it anymore. I can't take it anymore. So you win, okay? Here! Pheebs? Flying a jet? Better make it a spaceship, so that you can get back to your home planet! And Ross? Phone call for you today: Tom Jones. He wants his pants back! And Hornswoggle? What, are you dating a character from Fraggle Rock?