Phoebe: Okay, 'cause right after my mom killed herself, I was just in this really bad place, y'know personally. So, I just thought that it'd make me feel better if I wrote to Sesame Street, 'cause they were so nice when I was a little kid. No one ever wrote back.
Chandler: Well, you know, a lot of those Muppets don't have thumbs.

Phoebe: I will find a selfless good deed! I just gave birth to three children and I will not let them be raised in a world where Joey is right!

Ross: Okay then. Here we go. Magic 8-Ball, should I never see Rachel again? "Ask again later." Later is not good enough! "Ask again later." What the hell! This is broken! It... it is broken!
Monica: All right, let me see. Will Chandler have sex tonight? "Don't count on it." Seems like it works to me.