diary

Oct 30
Dear Diary,
     I just heard the best news! I nearly peed my pants! My evil arch enemy Dawn Wiener has retired! On his website he basically says he's sick of it all and sick of Word. However, I heard some tasty gossip about the real reason he retired. Word is, someone who really hated Dawn (there are so many of us) had evidence that Dawn was behind most of the cloning and that he had been cheating. He blackmailed Dawn into retiring. He told Dawn that if he didn't announce his retirement that he'd post all the evidence on the boards. Dawn didn't want to be exposed as a cheat, so he quit. I'm not saying all that is true, but it came from a very reliable source(s). I'm just glad that icky bastard is gone.
     I think H-E-I-D-I has a crush on me. She keeps following me around the playground. She keeps asking me, "How you doing?" I think she wants to be doing me. I tried to tell her I'm not a lesbian, but she said she's all the man I need. How can I agrue with that? I might make out a little with her behind the gym later. I hope she likes my panties.
     I heard CriSis play tonight, That band is awesome! Hopefully they'll get signed to a label soon. I would love to write a few songs for them! Maybe they'll play at the school carnival this year. That would be sweet.
     I need to go do some homework. Ms. Mosby is making us do a book report on "The Joy of Sex." I'm doing my report on doggy style. Woof woof!

AudreyHorne

Oct.29
Dear Diary,
     There is a master cat burgler terrorizing the boards. This criminal with no regard for the law stole Sock Puppet's icon and used it as his own. This sissy gangster is Bob33333.
     He was caught on the boards today. Ramona Q gave him a good scolding. "For shame, Bob! You've really gone too far this time." Beef said Bob had sunk to a new low. ScarySheri quickly whipped out her honor code. Bob33333 quickly ran for the hills.
     He's still on the loose. Detective Hill is searching for him. I'm being extra careful from now on. Every night before I go to bed, I'm gonna lock my panty drawer. Everyone knows Bob likes to wear them on his head. He's not getting my PowerPuff Girl panties!
     I went and saw Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2. It was horrible. I was a huge fan of the first film, but this one boring as hell. The first ten minutes it looks promising, but then it just dissolves into utter nonsense. There's not even a Book of Shadows anywhere in the film! The creators of the first film weren't responsible for this mess, thank goodness. However, they are writing and directing the third film, which takes place BEFORE the events of the first film. Hopefully, it will be much better than Part 2.
    Well, I'm off to bed. The Monkey's should be sending their votes in tomorrow and I need my beauty sleep. Sweet dreams.

AudreyHorne


Oct. 28

Dear Diary,

     Another sissy survivor has dropped out. It's like being a quitter has become quite popular on the playground. This time it was Creativ. I don't know all the details, but I think Creativ was getting too much heat for being RedRock and I also heard rumors of cloning. I don't know if it's true or not, but around here you never know. I really hate to see him leave the game, though. I was thinking of letting the survivors vote for a banished sissy to return as Creativ's alternate. I haven't made a decision yet. A lot depends if any of the banished wants to return.
     Today in Gym class, Dawn pushed me down while we were playing dodge ball. I wanted to tattle on him, but I knew our coach Ms. Mann wouldn't do anything. Dawn has every teacher thinking he's a sweet little angel. Hell's angel, maybe. Anyway, so instead of tattling, after school I told everyone on the bus that I saw Dawn naked in the shower room and he has a little dingie. Now everyone calls him DawnHasNoWiener. Touche'.
     I think thewitch put a spell on me. She was staring at me in science class and was whispering something under her breathe. I think I heard her say something about "buns" and "muffins". The next thing you know, I have a yeast infection! I think she did something to me. Scarysheri let me borrow some of her YeastAway, She has tons of it. I don't know why.
    Well, I need to go to bed, my diary. I'll tell you all about Gina's new boots tomorrow. Sweet dreams!

AudreyHorne