Reclaim My Place

There's a demon in my head
who starts to play a nightmare
tape loop of what went wrong yesterday.
The things that make me smile
I can't have, I can only watch
Them through a store window.
Wishing I had money to
Purchase such glorious items.
I look, but can't touch,
Window shopping sucks.
They tell me I will find
"the one", I used to know what
that meant, now I'm not so sure.
I feel like I'm alone
And drowning in this life.
"The one"; seems to be a myth.
Someone dreamed of, but
Non existent in this
Pitiful excuse of a life.
I look at photographs of
Memories not quite remembered,
And wish that I could go back
To those times and be truly
Happy again as in those
Moments of ignorance.
They say ignorance is bliss,
I'd have to agree.
I wish I could go back to being a baby.
A baby who had more fun
with the boxes the presents
came in than the actual gifts.
Someone whose greatest joy
of the day was a stick of gum.
I wish I could reclaim
my place in the ending tale
Of innocence.
For that would truly be
the greatest gift of all.