|
JOKE TITLE |
The Real Thing |
| World's
Funniest Joke by Sardarji !
Veggy |
Once
two hunters went to the Jungle for a hunt.One of two saw a Tiger and
fainted ,he don't even was breathing the other started crying in Panic.
Finally , after some time he called 911(Police) , and frighteningly said My Friend is not responding . I think he is no more The Operator responded : Are u sure of it ? Let's make it sure that it's true ! Then there was a silence and suddenly a loud noise of shot fire. The Hunter Replied" NOW WHAT ?" |
| Lots
of GuyZ for me !
Veggy |
I'm in a co-ed college and have a steady boyfriend who is studying abroad. I
meet a lot of guys and I am attracted to one of them. I am also very serious
about my boyfriend. What should I do? Absence has made your heart wander, not
fonder.
Clearly yours is a case of OUT OF SIGHT, OUT OF MIND. Now that you have |
| Love
Thy Teacher !
Veggy |
I'm in class 7, aged 12 and I am in love with my English teacher? She does
not seem to respond to my feelings? What should I do ?
Son what I think you should do is give her some time, meanwhile study and get promoted to the next class before you propose to her or you stand the chance of spending the rest of your life in class 7. On second thoughts that?s not such bad idea is it? You get to stay with her for the rest of your life. |
| Stains
on Clothes....Wash'em
Veggy |
While washing clothes I often forget the places from where I have to remove stains All you've got to do is just circle the stains with a permanent marker and then you?ll definitely remember where the stains are ... |
| Age
Does'nt Matter baby / baba !
Veggy |
I am a 14 year old boy in class 9 in love with a 12 year old girl in class 7.We are madly in love with each other and we plan to get married soon. How should
we go about it. Please advise?
WOW! thats starting out young. I hope you don't plan to have kids or something next. take my advice. i'll ...a ... not go into |
| Coffee
causes Pain ?
Veggy |
Every time I have coffee, I get an acute pain in my right eye. What should I do?
Remember to remove the spoon from the cup. |
| Strange
Friend of Mine !
Veggy |
I've been seeing this girl who I really like, and I know likes me, and some
mysterious stranger has been sending her flowers and tickets to some good shows
that she's been taking me to see.She doesn't know who this guy is, but when she
finds out, would it be proper for me to send him a note thanking him for the
tickets?
It was a really good show, and he must have spent a lot. I think you should to wait until you receive his thank-you card for the use of your living room for the many parties that he's had there. It will be polite to answer. |
| Shit
in Your Pants ! Ho HO ...
Non Veg |
Two men at a bar had been enjoying a few drinks for the past couple of hours and were pretty drunk when one of them notices a beautiful woman sitting in the corner. One says to the other, "Jeez, I'd really like to dance with that girl."
The other man replies, "Well go ahead and ask her, don't be a chicken shit." So the man approaches the lovely woman and says, "Excuse me. Would you be so kind as to dance with me?" Seeing the man is totally drunk the woman says, "I'm sorry. Right now I'm concentrating on matrimony, and I'd rather sit than dance." So the man humbly returns to his friend. "So what did she say?" asks the friend. The drunk responded, "She said she's constipated on macaroni, and would rather shit in her pants." |
| I
Wanna Open a F_ _ K Bank A/C
Non Veg |
A rather scruffy-looking man came into a bank. Reaching the head of the line, he said to the teller, "I wanna open a fucking checking account." "Certainly, sir," answered the teller, "but there's no need to use that kind of language." "Couldja move it along lady? I just wanna open a fucking checking account," growled the would-be customer. "I'll be glad to be of service, sir," said the teller, flushing slightly, "but I would appreciate not being spoken to in that way."
"Just lemme open a fucking checking account, okay?" "I'm afraid I'm going to have to speak to the branch manager," said the pissed-off teller, slipping off her stool and returning shortly with a dapper middle-aged man who asked how he could be of service. "I just won the ten-million dollar lottery, buddy," snarled the man, "and all I wanna do is open a fucking checking account." "I see," said the manager sympathetically. "And this BITCH is giving you trouble?" |
| Love
@ Second Sighting !
Veggy |
I
fell in love with my neighbour the very first time I saw her. But she does
not believe in love at first sight. What should I do?
Try walking through the door again. (love at second sight you dumb-ass.) |
| Let's
Talk about Sex !
Non Veg |
Stuck in a strange city by bad weather, the drinker was bored. He sat in the bar and looking to strike up a conversation, turned to bartender and said, "Hey, about those Democrats in the Congress . . . " "Stop -- I don't permit talk about politics in my bar", interrupted the bartender. A few minutes later the guy tried again, "People say about the Pope . . . " "No religion talk, either," the bartender cut in. "Look, how about sex. Can I talk sex?" "Sure." "Then fuck you." |
| Crushed
to Death
Non Veg |
On New Year's Eve,
"Saideep" stood up at the local pub and said that it was time to get ready. At the stroke of midnight, she wanted every husband to be standing next to the one person who made his life worth living. Well, it was kind of embarrassing... The bartender was almost crushed to death. |
| Sardarji
Da Garage ?
Veggy |
Sawaloon
ke jawaab Do !
1.Do Sardaron ne Garaage Khola.Par Chaleya Nahi.Batoa Kyon ? Kyonki UnanNe Second Floor te Kholaya see. |
| Bhaji
Tussi Great Ho !
Veggy |
2.Sardarji Di Waddi Beard Kyon ?
Aakhir Kripaan Kab Kaam Ayega ! |
| 12
' O Clock
Veggy |
Sardarji
:Saade Baraah(12) Hoon Nahin Wajde! Awaaz Aayee : Mai-O-Weh Ghadi Tod Deeti ! |