Abby finishes packing and closes her suitcase. "OK, I'm done. I've left
the kids my list of emergency numbers. I spoke to Nicholas's teacher and
told her to call Mary if there's any problem. Daisy said she'd remind
Max to come check on the kids. What am I forgetting? I have this
horrible feeling that some crisis will strike just as we step out the
door."

Tom smiles and wraps his arms around her.  "Abby there will be no
crises, true there might be a party but we won't be here to see it."  He
kisses her.

"There's going to be the party to end all parties," Abby predicts
gloomily.  "And we will see it, because the police will drag us back to
bail everyone out. What is it with this family and the station house
jail, anyway?"

"No they won't."  He assures her.  "This honeymoon is going to happen
and it won't be interrupted."

"Except for maybe room service," Abby says and kisses him.

"That's the only interruption we'll allow."  He returns the kiss.

"Maybe we ought to send the kids to Tahoe and stay right here, for all I
think we'll get to see of the outside..." Abby says, not sounding too
upset at the prospect.

"No way."  Tom says.

Abby laughs. "Well, you ready?" She picks up her suitcase and heads
towards the door.

"I sure am." He gets his suitcase and offers to take hers.

"It's OK, I've got it. Don't need you throwing your back out before we
even get going," Abby says, and starts down the steps.

"Do you guys need a ride."  Nancy offers being very happy to be able to
drive again.

"You know, maybe that's a good idea," Abby says, seeking Tom's approval.
"I'd rather leave my car here than at the airport, and this way the kids
will have both the station wagon and the sedan."

"Ok, but Nancy no picking up guys at the airport it would break Ray's
heart."

"I won't be Dad."

Tom and Abby say good bye to the rest of the kids and then Nancy drives
them to the airport.

When they get out of the car, Abby reminds Nancy, "You have the number
at the hotel. If there's any trouble, call. And don't do anything too
wild--you're still recuperating."

"No I'm not.  Dr. Max said I'm 100% healed now."  She protests. "You two
have a good time and don't worry about us."

"Yeah, right."

"Ok worry about us if you want."  She sighs.  "But don't let it
interrupt everything else."

"Nancy!" Abby says. "I thought there were things you just preferred not
even thinking about."

"Sight seeing, Abby, sight seeing."

"We better get going."  He hugs Nancy.  "Keep your younger sister and
younger brothers out of trouble ok."

Nancy returns the hug.  "What about my older brother and sisters."

"They promised to keep you out of trouble."

"Keep an eye on them, too. Especially Joannie," Abby says.

"Will do."  She hugs Abby.

After Nancy drives off, Tom and Abby check in, she suggests they call
the house and check in on everyone.

"Abby it's way too soon."  He says.

On the airplane, Abby snuggles up against her husband. "Hey, there," she
smiles, flirting.

"Hey there yourself."  He starts kissing her.

Abby returns the kisses--until the person across the aisle clears her
throat loudly and disapprovingly.

"You should really do something about that throat." Tom suggests.

Abby laughs, but she tries to be more discreet in her public display of
affection. "Poor Tom. Romance a boy, get into trouble. Romance a woman,
get into trouble. Can't win for losing."

~Romance a boy!!~  The guy who cleared his throat is in shock.

Abby notices this and gives a charming smirk. "When we get to the hotel,
though..." she says to Tom, loud enough for their eavesdropper to
overhear.

"Then we'll call the boy and make it a threesome."  He says with a smile
on his face.

"Well I never!!" The eavesdropper says.

"And you never will."  Tom says.

The eavesdropper leaves them alone for the rest of the flight.

"I'm not sharing you with anyone until we get back home," Abby whispers
to Tom when she can talk without laughing. "But I did happen to bring a
man-tailored suit in my luggage. Nancy did *not* approve of it at all."

"A man tailored suit?"

"Yep. So if you need a boy, you'll just have to make due with me."

"I don't need a boy just you."

"Sweet talker."

He just smiles and kisses her.

Meanwhile in the car.

"Party time!!  Yes everyone party time!!"  Nancy says finally able to
shout it.  "Wait a minute why am I talking to myself?"

Back at the house Joannie starts making a list of who to invite to the
house and gives it to Elizabeth. "You're the phone committee. Get to
work."

Elizabeth goes to make the phone calls.

After awhile Nancy returns.  "All right brothers and sisters of the
asylum the wardens are gone it's time for the inmates to party!!"

"You're a little behind the times, little sister. Check out the guys in
the den," Joannie says.

"Wow if I didn't like Ray so much."

"Hey, looking's free," Joannie reminds her.

"It sure is."  Nancy smiles.

"Now you go make some calls and get me some guys I can touch," Joannie
instructs.

"Do you mean to tell me that they'll be more interested in Tommy than
they'll be in us?"

"Don't tell him, OK? Those are the guys I work with."

"Don't worry I won't."  Nancy smiles and goes to make some phone calls.
Afterwards she finds Sam staring at her.  "No little guy I'm not calling
up any female doggies for you."

"Woof..." Sam moans.

Nancy laughs. "Ok I'll think about it."  She picks him up.  "But you're
still too young to date."  She goes to get him some food and water.

"Hey, Nance, talking about too young to date, what are we going to do
about Nicholas?"

"Don't tell me he has a girlfriend."  Nancy says to Joannie.

"No, he doesn't. But he'll want to have friends over if we do, and I
don't want to share my party with Kenny P. Landers."

"I don't either."  Tells her why there's a new kitchen window.  "He
scared the wits out of me. I thought we had a dangerous intruder."

"Maybe we could make Nicholas have his party in the great outdoors.
Somewhere nice. Like Yosemite."

Nancy laughs.

The door opens and more people stream in. "All right. We've got bodies.
Now we need food and music," Joannie orders her siblings around.

Tommy provides the band while the girls provide the food and beverages.

The plane lands and they catch a cab to the hotel. "So," Abby says,
"what do you want to do now? Nancy said we should sightsee. Have any
sights you want me to see?"

"I'll show you when we get to the hotel."

"So I'm assuming this will be a private tour?"

"A very private tour."

"Can't this cab go any faster?" Abby complains.

The driver speeds up a little.

They pull up to the hotel. Tom pays the driver and they go to the check
in desk.

"Hello, we have reservations."  Tom tells the hotel clerk.

"Your name, please?"

"Tom and Abby Bradford."

"Oh, yes, I have your reservation right here." The clerk pushes some
papers over to Tom to sign, then hands him a key. "Congratulations."

"Thank you."  Tom says as he takes the key and kisses Abby.

"Why don't you save the displays for upstairs?" Abby suggests.

"Ok," they head upstairs.

When they get upstairs, before she gets into something more comfortable
or kisses Tom or anything else, she asks, "Now can we call the kids?"

"Yes now we can call the kids."

Abby gives him a quick kiss and dials the house.

Elizabeth answers the phone.  "Hello."

"Hi," Abby says, trying to figure out if she hears a party in the
background. "Just wanted to let you know we got in all right and give
you the room number. Things OK there?"

"Yes, Nancy's run off with a guitar player and I'm comforting Ray."
Elizabeth teases.

 "Oh, all right, then, as long as you ended up with the cute guy," Abby
says.

Elizabeth laughs and Nancy grabs the phone.  "It wasn't the guitar
player it was the drummer."  She tells Abby.

"Good. He's cuter." She covers the mouthpiece. "Tom, you want to talk to
them?"

"I'll talk to them tomorrow. If I talk to them now.  I'll ask all of
those embarrassing questions."

"OK." She talks to the kids a little while longer and then says good
bye. "They didn't wait  long," she tells Tom. "There was music in the
background and too many voices."

Tom shakes his head. "As long as there's no drinking, drugs, or police
involved."

"All right then, I'll try not to worry. Of course, if something
distracted me, I wouldn't be able to worry..." Abby hints.

Tom takes the hint and starts kissing her among other things.

"You're a quick study," Abby laughs.

"I have a very good teacher."

"You'd be surprised what I can teach."

"Enlighten me."

"I warn you--I'm not easy..."

"I can take it."

"I hope you're the type who crams, mister."

"I am." He continues kissing her.

"Because I give lots of exams, and I expect you to give me your all."

"Oh you got it lady."

"No, I don't. Not yet. But you can fix that."

Tom grins.

Abby starts to kiss Tom, but is interrupted by the ringing phone. "I
should just pull the stupid thing out of the wall," she groans.

"How bout we just unplug the phone line."

"But what if it's the kids?" Abby worries. "Or the police?"

Tom sighs and answers the phone.  "Hello?"

"Hello, could I please speak to Sandra Sue Bradford. I'm afraid it's
rather urgent," the voice says.

"May I ask who's calling?"

"I'm with the school district."

Tom covers the receiver and whispers this to Abby.

Abby nods and takes the phone. She listens for a few seconds and then
says, "Look, this isn't really urgent...Well, OK, maybe to you it is,
but not on the grander scale of things.... Why don't you ask
Lisa?...They can handle it until I get back...No, I'm not saying it
isn't important. I am saying that I'm not there. I'm away. I'm on my
honeymoon. And I'm not flying back to deal with some upset parent...Yes,
fine, leave the file in my mail slot...Yes, I'll look at it as soon as I
get back...No, you may not call me with an update!...I will deal with it
when I get back. Now go away and don't call me again here unless the
entire school district burnt down, OK?" Abby says goodbye and hangs up.
"See?" she says to Tom. "Even teachers can learn new tricks."

Tom laughs and hugs her.

Abby pulls the plug on the telephone. "Now, where were we before we got
interrupted?"

Tom starts kissing her.  "We were here and we were..."  Kisses her
earlobe. "here."

"Here's a really nice place to be," Abby says, and leads him to the
bedroom. "And here's even a better place," she says as she shuts the
door from force of newly-acquired habit.

"Yes it's a very nice place."  He says as he continues to kiss her.

"Don't mind me. I'm just going to do a little sightseeing," Abby says as
she begins to kiss him.

"I don't mind at all."

"Somehow I didn't think you would."

Tom just gazes into her eyes as he kisses her and tells her that he
loves her.

Abby stops what she's doing and looks at Tom. "I love you, too." She
traces her fingers over his lips, his cheek. "You have no idea how much
I love you."

"Why don't you show me."  He whispers.

So she does.

A while later: "So, don't you love me?" Abby pretends to pout.

Tom proceeds to show her just how much he loves her.

Meanwhile, back at the house, more and more partiers show up at Bradford
Party Central.

Ray takes Nancy in his arms and kisses her hello.

A moment later.

"Well hello to you too."  She smiles.

"So much for just looking," Joannie mutters as she passes by the couple.

"Hey Ray do you want to come upstairs we can lock the door."  Nancy says
loud enough for Joannie to hear.

"Good idea, Nance," Joannie shouts back. "Elizabeth always did want her
own room."

"It's ok babe she won't kill you if we just go to my place."  Ray says
loud enough for Joannie to hear.

"I wasn't planning to kill anyone. I might chip my nails. It's Dad
who'll kill her if he finds out."

"He won't find out."  Ray promises.  "Besides we were just going to play
cards."

"Yeah cards."  Nancy says.  The doorbell rings.  "Hey Joannie I think
that's for you."

Joannie answers the door and her jaw drops. "Well, hello handsome. Come
right in. The party's upstairs--let me show you where."

"You must be Joannie."  He smiles at her.

"Yes, but you can call me 'Beautiful'." Joannie smiles at him.

"Ok beautiful."  He says.

Nancy looks over and smiles at them.  Soon Ray takes her out on the
dance floor.

Joannie takes her hunk out to the sun porch for a little privacy.

"By the way I'm Sean."  He says.

"No, you're not," Joannie says. "You're Adonis himself."

He smiles and thinks about kissing her.  ~Is it too soon?  Will she slap
me?~

"So," Joannie says, noticing the way he's leaning in towards her and
wanting to postpone the inevitable until she's got an audience of one
envious sister or another, "tell me all about yourself. Your last name,
what you're studying, what you like about me."

"So far I like everything about you.  I'm a fine arts major, and my last
name is Williams. And you?"

"I'm a drama major, my last name's Bradford, and I like everything about
me, too," Joannie jokes.

He chuckles.  "That's good to know."

"And I like what I see of you, too."

"That's very good to know."

"So, what else about you should I like?"

"Hmm, that's a tough call I'm not very good at listing my good points.
Just the good points of others."

"So don't list them, show them."

He grins and this time kisses her.

When they come up for air Joannie murmurs, "Definitely a good point..."

"Joannie where's Mary?"  Elizabeth asks as she barges in.

"Not here. Bye, Elizabeth."

Elizabeth takes in the scene.  "Hi I'm Elizabeth."

"Yes, this is my little sister, who's just off to go find my older
sister. Right, Elizabeth?"

After seeing the look on Joannie's face Elizabeth makes a quick exit.

"Now, where were we?" Joannie asks Sean.

Sean reminds her with his kisses.

"Oh, yeah, there..." Joannie giggles. She starts returning the kisses,
but is interrupted by a loud bang from inside the house.

They go to where it came from.

"Oh no."  Nancy says stunned.

"Don't worry I'll hide you and your siblings till it all blows over."
Ray tells her.

"What happened?" Joannie sighs. "And what story are we going to cook up
to protect us all?"

"Two of Tommy's friends were fighting and they banged the bookcase and
it fell and almost hit Nancy, but Ray in the nick of time pushed her out
of the way.  He's a hero."  Elizabeth says.  "And we can always have a
fund raiser and use the money to buy a new bookcase."

"Forget that, we'll need the money to buy us a place to live after Dad
kicks us out. Think David could fix it?"

Nancy examines it.  "He might be able to."

"Or he might just send flowers to our funerals," Joannie moans.

"Joannie it'll be all right."  Nancy tells her.  "David can fix it."

"He didn't want to take the responsibility, remember? Why would he clean
up our mess?"

"I'll fix it."  Jason says.

"I'll help him."  Ray offers.

They start working on the bookcase.

"Excuse me."  Cassie goes upstairs to the bathroom and loses her lunch.

One of the guys asks Joannie for a hammer, so she goes upstairs to get
it, and bumps into Cassie on her way out of the bathroom. "You OK?"

"Yeah it will pass.  Only happens in the morning and afternoon."

"Good." Joannie takes at least two steps away before she realizes what
Cassie's said. "Have you been to a doctor?" she asks.

"Not yet.  Nancy's taking me tomorrow.  I haven't told Jason yet."

"You should, you know. It is his, too. It is, isn't it?"

"Of course."  ~Or Ray's.~  Cassie and Ray had been seeing each other
behind Jason and Nancy's backs.

"Then tell him. If you are--are you going to have it?"

"Yes, but I don't know if it's a good idea to tell him."

"Why not? You won't be able to keep it a secret long you know. He's
bound to notice you tossing your cookies one of these mornings."

"Maybe because there's no possible way it can be mine."  Jason rages
behind them.  "We haven't done anything in quite a while due to your
headaches!!"

Nancy and Ray come upstairs.

"Jason what is your problem?"  Nancy asks.  "Stop yelling at her."

~Oh no it must be mine.~  Ray fears.

Joannie starts to drag bodies into her room. "Nicholas could be out
there," she explains.

Cassie starts crying and looks at Ray for reassurance.

Ray nods.

Nancy looks at them both in confusion.  "What's going on here?"

"Nancy, Jason, before I tell you this.  Please know that I care about
you both very much."  Cassie begins.

"We never meant to hurt either of you."  Ray adds.

"I'm not sure I want to hear this."  Nancy says.

"You have to hear it."  Cassie says.  "Although I hate to have to tell
you this.  The baby might be Ray's.  We've been sleeping together for
quite some time even after you two became a couple."

Nancy moves away from Ray.  The look of anger and pain on her face very
clear.

"Nancy listen to me."  Cassie pleads.

"I think I've heard enough slut."  Nancy says.

"Nancy come on it's not like we planned it to happen." Ray says.

She turns around and slaps him so hard his head turns and then she
leaves the room.

Ray finds Jason glaring at him.

"Go ahead man beat me up."  He says.

"So you can feel better about this.  I don't think so.  You're not worth
it."  Jason says and then turns to Cassie.  "We need to talk later."  He
leaves the room.

Ray sighs in guilt.

"And my father let you kiss Nancy and take her up to bed because 'he's
such a nice boy'," Joannie spits out.

"Joannie I never meant to hurt her.  Cassie and I tried to call it quits
when Nancy and I got together but we couldn't."

"Joannie please believe me.  Nancy is the last person in the world I
would ever want to hurt."  Cassie pleads.

"Why don't the two of you just get out," Joannie says. "Just leave, OK?"

Ray and Cassie leave.  She moves out of Jason's place and into Ray's.

"Nance?" Joannie goes into the hall looking for her sister.

"I'm in here."  Nancy's tear filled voice calls from her bedroom.

Joannie goes in and sits on Nancy's bed. "Hey, there."

"Hey."  She says quietly and continues to cry.

"He's not worth it, you know."

"But I was really starting to like him, and Cassie.  I hate them, I hate
them both."

"Sure you do, now, but they're not worth it. If anything, you ought to
feel sorry for them, I guess. They're pretty sad specimens."

Nancy manages a laugh.  "Yeah they are aren't they?"

"Yep. How many times have I told you to stay away from Susan's dumb jock
friends? Their brains get too bashed up on the field."

Nancy laughs and then starts crying again.

Elizabeth walks in and takes in the scene.

"It's your party and you'll cry if you want to?"  She jokes.

"Hey, it's my party, too," Joannie says. "And that rat isn't worth the
tears. Come on, beautiful, let's go downstairs and find another frog to
kiss," she tells Nancy.

After Nancy's all cried out, she dries her tears and redoes her makeup.
"Ok let's go."  She fakes a smile and goes downstairs.

When they get down there Elizabeth pulls Joannie aside.  "What
happened?"

Joannie considers how much to tell. "Ray's a jerk, and Cassie's an even
bigger one."

"Joannie what did they do to her?"  Elizabeth asks ready to go on the
warpath.

"It's not what they did to her, it's more what they did to each other."

"Oh, oh!!!"  Elizabeth gets very angry.  "You're right they're not worth
crying over."  She looks over at Nancy who throws her arms around the
first guy she finds and kisses him long and hard.
"Uh Joannie, I think she took you a little too seriously."

Joannie rushes over and pries Nancy off of Sean. "Little sister, we need
to have a talk. The sun porch. Now."

Nancy realizes who she just kissed and pales with guilt and fear and
then she starts crying again.  "I'm sorry Joannie I didn't realize."
She mumbles something about being a terrible sister and runs out of the
house.

"Joannie, she just jumped on me," Sean says. "I..."

"It's OK. I'll be back!" Joannie runs after her sister.

Nancy is trying to open the car door but keeps fumbling with the keys.

Joannie takes the keys away from her. "Never drive when you're upset.
You always go straight to the hamburger joint and overdose on ice cream
sodas. I will not be the cause of a zit attack."

"Joannie I'm so sorry.  I didn't realize who he was honest."

"That's what he said, too--you just came down the steps and grabbed the
first man you found. You're lucky it was him. It could have been some
skuzzball."

"I really don't know what got into me."  She says.

"You were upset. Happens to everyone when they find out the nice boy
they were dating is a rot-louse."

"Yeah, but my best friend.  Of all the people in the world he has to
cheat with her.  Make that ex best friend."

"Hey, it takes two to--well, tango. He knew she was your best friend,
but he didn't keep away from her."

Nancy laughs bitterly.  "I'm beginning to think I'll never find a guy
who isn't either a psycho or a louse."

Joannie leans in close to her. "I don't think there's a guy in
Sacramento who isn't one or the other."

"So where does that leave us?"

"We could do what Dad did and make sure our dates come from other
cities," Joannie suggests.

"Good idea."  Nancy finally manages a real smile.

"Or we could go down to San Francisco and get those out of town boys
ourselves."

Nancy glances at the car.  "Dad left a full tank of gas and it would
only take an hour and a half to get there."

Joannie weighs the risks against the possibility of Nancy smiling. "Only
if you let me drive."

"You got it."

"Great. I'll go get our bags--if we both go in, Mary might catch us.
Stay here and look casual." Joannie heads back into the house and
upstairs to get their purses.

Nancy and Joannie are on the road within minutes in the station wagon.

"Find a good radio station," Joannie says. "Don't worry about playing
with the dial--you're not driving."

Nancy laughs.  "Will I ever live that down."  She finds a Rock Station.

"As soon as I live down running away--as far as the front door," Joannie
answers.

"Yeah how far did I get when I tried to runaway as a child?"

"As far as the nearest cute guy."

"Are you telling me that I never when through a phase where I hated
boys?"

"Of course you did. I remember it--October 16, 1969, from 3pm to 4."

Nancy laughs.  "I remember that, the boy from across the street had
broken my heart."

"Told you--it's all guys from Sacramento. There's probably something in
the water."

"Yeah probably."

"We'll know for sure within the next two hours," Joannie tries to cheer
Nancy up.

Nancy grins and starts singing along to the radio.

~Looks like she's forgetting the jerk. Good.~ Joannie thinks.

A little while later they arrive in Frisco and start scoping out men.

"How bout that one?"  Nancy says.

"He's OK. If you like the cute type," Joannie says. "What about that one
over there?"

"I don't Joannie he looks married."

"How can you tell?"

"Well he looks confused, he has a list in his hand, and look what's in
the bag.  Tampons."

"I could deal with the confused, and maybe the tampons are for his
sister, but you're right--the list is a dead giveaway. Next."

Two guys approach them.

"Hi ladies."  One of them says.

"Forget it, Nancy," Joannie says. "You know what they say about San
Francisco and granola? They'd make good friends, but we want more than
friendship."

They leave the two guys standing there and then go to a restaurant.
They get many propositions and a few proposals but they turn them all
down.  Waiting for the right men to come along.

Joannie is the voice of doom and gloom. "Maybe they all moved down here
from Sacramento."

"That is a very depressing thought."  Her eye catches the eye of a guy
sitting at the bar.  He's tall, dark, and very handsome.  He smiles, she
smiles back and he comes over.

"Would you like to dance?"

"Sure I..."

He holds his hand out to Joannie.

"She'd love to."  Nancy says.

"Nancy!" Joannie hisses.

He smiles at Joannie.  "I won't bite I promise."

"That's too bad."

Nancy stifles back a laugh.

"So do you want to dance?"  He asks Joannie again.

"Only if you'll reconsider that biting thing."

He grins and takes her to the dance floor.  Seconds later another good looking guy sits down next to Nancy and starts kissing her.  She kicks him where it counts and he runs home to mommy.  Soon after another guy sits down.
  Part two