>Love Story of Slorr and Flyndance > > > >I met her on the net.. >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ >I can't remember. but it seems to me that it was this 'little >theory' which I declared on the cyberspace that caught her >attention: > >�If I have a million dollars, I would buy a house. do I have a >million? No. >that's why I don't have a house. >If I have wings, I can fly. do I have wings? No. so I can never fly. >If all the waters are drawn out of Pacific Ocean, but it still can't >put off the flame of love between us. Can all the waters of Pacific >Ocean be drawn off? No. That's why I don't love you.� > >That's me, a typical science student. First you come up with an >assumption, then you fit a suitable conclusion. If the proposed >assumption doesn't stand at all, then everything is just bullshit. I >guess this is what they call 'unromantic'. > >However, she is an exception. she actually mailed me and said that I >am an interesting person. > >�Interesting�? What a word to use on me. It's like using 'faithful' >on Mr. Clinton. I thought this girl must be a low-IQ organism, or >suffering from serious brain damage. Anyway, her nick doesn't seem >so bad. -FLYNDANCE-. that's quite a unique one. But I was warning >myself: Hello, this is the virtual world of Internet. Who knows what >might be lurking behind a beautiful nick. > >Talking from experience, most of the time it will be a 'dinosaur' in >disguise. The only differences will be whether it is a carnivore or >a herbivore but, I know she is way different from a 'dinosaur'. She >is special.. >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > >So, I guess it�s time for the appearance of �FlyNDance-. > >Ever since she mailed to tell me that I am 'interesting', I was >always hoping to meet her in the channel #AJCRR. Too bad, lady luck >was just not on my side. So, I can only reply her letter to tell her >that I will start to train myself to become an �interesting' person, >just to show that she is far-sighted. > >She replied my reply, I replied her reply to my reply, she again >replied my reply to her reply, and blah blah blah... Oh no, I just >started a chain-reaction.. > >Actually, what interested me the most is this paragraph she wrote in >one of the mails... > >�I dance swiftly, amidst the crowd. Your glance on me be it >surprise, be it admiration, it ain't going to stop my rhythm. >Because it's not your glance that made me dance, it's my heart of >youth.� I simply cannot relate this girl to any of the 'dinosaurs'. >But if she really is a dinosaur, I am willing to let her have her >fill. > >Tye, my best pal, unfortunately, noticed my little affair with >FlyNDance, and has been perpetually warning me about this. > >"HELLO! You don't even know what she looks like, why take the risk?? >Maybe she�s a guy!" > >I can't blame Tye for his ignorance. Ever since he was dumped by >Sally in Secondary 4, he has become a renowned 'playboy'. > >As the saying goes: "Once bitten, Twice shy". In this case, after >Tye was bitten, he has mastered the art of skinning snakes alive, >and make them into soup. But he got all the factors to be a playboy, >I always think he is the 19 year-old version of Brad Pitt. Tall, >handsome and has got this tongue that causes diabetes in every women >he targets. I don't think he can even remember how many girlfriends >he has had. > > >I went online one night, log onto channel #AJCRR and yes! She was >there for the first time. We had only been emailing each other >before that. > >Before I can get over the surprise and the daze, she sent me a >message. > >"Hey Slorr, so late liao haven't sleep ah?" > >�Now what? Now what?� I thought. >Ok ok, I had to calm down first. I swallowed hard on my saliva, took >a few deep breath. >�Now, where is that Tye when I needed him most at such crucial >moment, somebody to tell me what to say to her?� I thought. How am I >going to attract her with my pathetic humor, which has gone stale? > >"Slorr, me in a foul mood today. Can't sleep, you leh?" > >�MOTHER'S (direct translation to Chinese).. what Slorr Slorr...� I >thought. > >Now when I read it twice in a row, I am beginning to feel disgusted >with that nick Tye gave me. Tye said: "Who knows, it might attract >some innocent gals in talking to you." -_-� > >"I am not feeling very good too. So let's sad together." I replied. > >Finally squeezed a sentence out, but I could already feel droplets >of sweat forming on my forehead. Actually I am not in a bad mood, I >just wanna follow up on her topic, that's all. And if she asks for >the reason for me feeling down, I can say: "Since you are feeling >down, how can I ever be happy?" > >I know it sounds mushy, but Tye said: "MUSHINESS IS THE FUNDAMENTAL >TO ALL COURTSHIP." And gals are a very weird species. They trust >their ears far more than their eyes. So instead of doing 10 things >to impress her, why not just say a sentence to move her. > >"Ok, but you haven't greet me leh." She complained. > >Damnit!! How can I forget simple manners to gals? To think they call >me Mr Courteous in school. If this thing ever leaks out in school, I >would lose all my female fans.. > >"Nice to meet you, Miss long-hair." I chucked. > >I've been wishing that she's keeping long hair. Tye once said: >"FlyNDance.. hmm.. She would either be long-haired or a desperado, >cos when gals dance, only 2 parts of them may fly: hair or skirt. So >if she doesn�t has long hair, that means her skirt flies when she >dances.. AH-HA!! This has a certain sexual hint in it...haha.." -_-� > >"Eh? How you know I got long hair?" > >BINGO! Heaven is on my side this time. It goes to prove that she is >not a desperado. Yes! > >"Not only that, I also know you seldom wear skirt." I increased the >stake, and if I am correct this time, then peace on earth forever.. > >"Err... I guess you are right lor. But how you know one?" > >"Just guess." > >"Ok lor. Hey Slorr, tell you what, me tired liao, you coming online >tomorrow morning?" > >"Ya. why??" > >"Please, please please say that you coming too, if not I am going to >kill myself for letting you go tonight. I'll see ya tomorrow at 10 >am then. Good night." > >"Er.. should be today at 10 am.. ok.. good night too." I just >blurted out a last sentence. >-Offline- >Suddenly I was so impressed by my performance just now. But is the >season of spring really arriving for me?? I wished.. >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ >�Slorr, what a coincidence ahh" > >"Yeh, I am not late." > >"Ya lor, so qiao." > >Girls are weird. I thought we already had an arrangement.. Why does >she have to pretend that it�s �qiao he�? They must have watched too >many movies, and like to think that guys they meet due to the thing >called 'fate' is the best thing that can happen to their love life. > >"Slorr, you talking nonsense lah." > >"Nonsense? Ok, let me tell you what is nonsense -- Setting: Summer's >beach. Characters: A sporty guy who must be good at running, with >broad shoulders, dark complexion with a tint of redness, sparkling >eyes and loud laughter. Scene: He will call out the name of the girl >running towards her loudly, carry her and spin 3 rounds >anticlockwisely. --" > >"Slorr, you siao liaoz ahh?" > >"I siao? Ok, let's change a location then. Deep in the mountains. >The guy has long hair, gotta have the look of an artist. Scene: >Carrying a sketching stand, a few pieces of drawings, and you can >see birds stop over at his side, admiring his work. And there will >be a girl who is his model, and most probably naked." > >"Slorr, but these all very romantic mah." > >"Romantic? Hello miss, romance only survive in novels and movies. In >real life, the guy on the beach might just step onto broken glass on >the beach, or the girl might be too heavy, and that tore his arm >muscles. Birds may just clear their waste on top of that guy in the >mountains, or he might get a thrashing from the girl because he >comments on the excess fats around her waist and hips." > >"Slorr, you hate romance..?" > >"I hate romance? Nope. I am just using my knowledge of statistics to >get a deduction, that guys must be tall to be romantic, not >handsome!! Some love novels even portray the guy as normal looking, >but no one dares to challenge the height of him! I object, because I >am not tall." > >"?Slorr.... objection overruled..." > >I think I am really outstandingly bo liao. I talked to her about all >these until noon. > >"Slorr, are you hungry?" > >"Ya, you leh?" > >"Yes, guess its time for lunch...Slorr." > >"Then do you think we should eat together?" > >"Slorr, I am just asking. I don't intend to have lunch with you." > >"Ok, good. I am not romantic, neither are you.." >I had lunch with Tye. We talked about the conversation with >FlyNDance this morning. > >"You moron. Told her you are not romantic.. you siao ah? You have >disgraced me man. How can you make such a big mistake?" > >"....I...I..." > >Tye grabbed a chicken wing with chopstick, and I can see the >trembling of his hand and the chicken. > >"There are 3 don�ts in chasing a girl... One, don't forget to be >romantic; Two, don't be too honest; Three, don't be too stingy on >the sugar in our speech. In mandarin, we say 'nan ren bu huai, nu >ren bu ai', you should know this." > > >"This I know, but it has been a controversial topic over centuries. >Women aren't really that, cheap" > >"So why would they only fall for 'bad guys' like me?" > >"That's because 'bad guys' are usually romantic. Those 'nice guys' >are usually, dumdums. So she would rather choose a romantic 'bad >guy' rather than any of those dumdums. In math we call this 2C1, >understand? dumdum." > >Now I understand. No wonder I have always been left on the shelf. > >"In other words, gals wouldn't mind if you are not tall, if you are >not handsome. They can bear with your inconsiderate acts... can >forget your stupidity... but they can never forgive u if you are not >romantic..." > >"Come on, this is so exaggerating." > >"Hey, most women have a 'knot' for romance, just like most men have >a knot for virginity. To women they just can't understand how >precious the thin layer of membrane is to men. Same thing, men can't >imagine how important women treats romance." > >"This is bullshit! How come I've never heard of that.." > >"The key word is 'knot', if you can untie it, fine. But how many had >actually succeeded in that? Practically none." > >"Ok, fine. Now I've already told her. So what should I do to remedy >the situation?" > >"Face it. You are hopeless already. I promise you I'll have a drink >with you when you and her are over." > >�You SON OF A BITCH.� >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ >It was midnight. I was trying to concentrate on my physics notes... > >�F=ma, v=u+at...� > >It's really a wonder that nature can be explained by just a few >formulas and equations, and this we call science. Then why is >astrology and palmistry being labeled as superstitions? Science >should only be one of the ways to explain truth. What can't be >explained by science, doesn't necessarily mean that it's untrue... >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > >Close to 1 am already. Since I can't get anything into my head, I >shall try my luck on the net then. Maybe she is there.. > > >-Online- >"Slorr, you here finally. good night to you." > >Finally? Strange word to use it here. What is she doing here at this >hour? Must be feeling down again.. > >"Yes, it is fate that brought me to you at this moment." I am trying >very hard to convince her that I am a teeny weeny bit romantic. > >"Slorr, nothing to do with fate. I waited for you for one hour >liaoz..." > >"Sure or not? For what?" > >"Talk to you mah.. or else I can't sleep." > >"You sick is it? Go see doctor lah " > >"Slorr, let's continue our topic. What do you think of relationships >that begin from the Internet?" > >Oh my god, how should I answer her now? > >"It's... it's very... romantic..." > >Indeed I am not a good liar, even my words are shaking now. > >"Slorr, you bluffing. You not romantic one mah." > >GAME OVER. I am finished! Ha-Ha. No choice but to drink with Tye. I >kept silent. > >"Slorr, you lagging? Or just daoing me?" > >"No.. I am wondering why is the sky so chio tonight?" I tried, >again. > >"No no no. Don't try to shift the topic, Slorr." > >Sigh. I give up. I asked for it myself. > >"Actually I think relationships that start from cyberspace is >considered romantic, cos romance gives people an impression of >unreal, and cyberspace is virtual." > >"Slorr, that's interesting." > >"Surfers keep a safe distance from each other and usually 3 types of >people are produced in this way. The first type... are those who >present themselves on net with their secondary personality'. Usually >all of us consist of multiple personalities and in everyday life, >what we present to the world is our 'primary personality', with the >secondary one being suppressed, or maybe we might not even realize >this other trait of us deep inside. So Internet is the place where >this side of us is revealed, both intentionally or without conscious >knowledge." > >"Is it true? What about 2nd type?" > >"The 2nd type are those who will transform themselves into the kind >of man/woman he/she would want to be. There's bound to be 1 or 2 >characteristics that you particularly admire, but too bad, sometimes >these characteristics just couldn't be found in you. Cyberspace is >the perfect location for this transformation to occur." > >�Slorr, you blowing cow, is it? Type 3 leh?" > >"I am not blowing cow. I read it from an article of TIMES >magazine..! Type 3 will be those who transform themselves into >characters that are impossible for them to become in real life. For >example, if you are a girl, you may act as a man on net. You may >even become Batman or Superman if you want." > >"Hmmh.. That's pretty amazing." > >"The first type is the 'faithful' type, �cos it�s his own >personality that is being presented on net. The 2nd type is the >'foolish' type, 'cos he knows only how to admire others, always >forgetting his own strong points. The 3rd type is the 'pathetic' >type, 'cos he is wishing 4 some impossible." > >"Slorr, then you belong to what type? Me leh?" > >"I don't wish to believe you are type 3, 'cos I am not. I crossed >the possibility of u in type 1 cos it�s too common, and I think you >are special. For me. Well.. being able to attract you, I think I am >at least a bit special. So we belong to type 2." > >"Type 2, then who you wish to become? Slorr.." > >I certainly would like to become a person like Tye, humorous, >romantic and eloquent, 'cos these are what I am lacking. > >"Slorr, what about me?" > >�You? I don't know. You want to Fly and Dance. Probably that means >you wish to fully enjoy your youth while you can. But if this is >something you wish yet you can't achieve, then there's 2 >possibilities: 1, you are aging. 2, you are leaving the world." > >I think I said something wrong, cos she didn't send me anymore >message after this. I began to blame myself for being so perverted. >Why talk about these things? I should have discussed with her >whether Zoe or Fann should be the queen of Caldecott Hill.. Damn >that TIMES magazine! Poisoned my mind. Maybe she is just lagging, >and so I waited... and waited. Girl, it�s just a few minutes, but it >felt like several hours. I want to apologize, but did not know how >to start, until she sent me this message: "Slorr... let's meet..." > >Without hesitation, I used the hand that I had used throughout my 18 >years to wipe my ass to type 'O-K'. >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > >I am supposed to meet FlyNDance tonight, 8pm, at the entrance of >McDonalds. The one beside YMCA. That's the best time and place to >meet a girl you have never met before, according to Tye, Cos they >would have taken their dinner by that time, which means we could >simply go inside Mac and have some fries and coke. > >She will be wearing a whole set of coffee theme attire and I will be >wearing my usual blues. This is our way of identification. She told >me she is not those 'cute gals' that I may think she is. I said >never mind. I am not >Brad-pitt either. Then, she told me she has long ago given up on >this idea already. -_-� >"Slorr, you are early." > >While I was idling, a girl tapped my shoulders from my back. > >Although I was already mentally prepared for anything that's going >to appear in front of me, I was still astonished by this girl who >stood in front of me now. If not for the coffee theme and that >'Slorr', I would have thought she was only asking for directions. >She is one of those 'chio bu' that can only be found on Orchard >Road, which I usually see while crossing the road. Maybe I suffered >from a serious concussion due to the heavy excitement. My mind was >extraordinarily calm. > >"Had your dinner right? I think we shall go inside the Mac first." I >started. > >"You are pretty smart huh? A good way to save money indeed." > >Aiya! She knows me so well. I can only give her an innocent smile >back. > >Since she's so pretty, I ordered 2 Large cokes, and even ordered Two >packets of fries. > >"This time you treat, next time I'll let you treat." She said. > >I am not falling for that, miss. But I am glad she mentioned 'next >time'. > >"Slorr, are you disappointed when you saw me just now?" > >Disappointed? Are you drunk? > >"Why do you think I will be disappointed then?" > >"Cos I told you I am not cute mah, so you must be quite >dissappointed when you saw me" > >She is making zero-sense, but I know she is just trying to hint that >she's actually cute. > >"Then why did you have to lie that you are not cute?" > >"Slorr. I said I am not cute. I didn't say I am not pretty." > >#$%$##%^*&%$@!!! > >"But you are also quite decent looking what.. It's not like what you >described to me too." She continued. > >Decent? A very vague word. To many gals, decent=boring. One good >thing is that she didn't lie to me about the fact that she is >keeping long hair. She also has a fair complexion which reminds me >of HL milk which I take almost everyday. It is only now that I found >out she is from ACJC, but had spent her first 3 mths in AJ. > >Sitting in front of each other, we talked about many things. From >her obsession with coffee to my hobby of watching movies. By the >way, she had completely changed my misconception of �if she is >pretty, she is brainless.� >She appears to be an attractive girl, both physically and character >wise, talking and smiling to me, occasionally being a little >sarcastic and nasty. > >It's like a dream. > >We left the Mac at around 10 pm. Since it's still early, I decided >to send her home and fortunately, it's just Ang Mo Kio, two MRT >stops from mine. I would have second thoughts if she's staying at >Pasir Ris. > >"Slorr, congratulations! You are officially permitted to date me >from now on." She said this before the lift door closed. > >Back at home, I realized that I hadn't asked for her real name. >Maybe it's the influence of that stupid Tye. He told me: �Never ask >a pretty girl her name the first time you meet her, cos there are >already too many wolves out there dying to know, so she will be more >interested in you if you act bochap.� >Then why didn't she ask for mine? Don't tell me there's a female >version of Tye telling her not to? >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > >It's 1 am again. Time to meet her in #AJCRR. > >"Hi! Slorr you tired?" > >Of course I am tired after all the surprises she presented me. I >would have gone straight to bed if not for her. But why is she here >also? Isn't she tired too? > >�Long time no see.. How are you?" > >"Slorr you siao ah? 2 hours only leh... miss me?� > >"A )Yes B) Of Course C) Abuden D) Dying to see you E) All of >above. Answer is E.� I replied. >Seems like she is really tired. Even the smiling face is yawning to >me right now. > >"You wanna go for a movie tomorrow?" > >Maybe I should ask her now, while she is half asleep, hoping that >she will blurly-blurly type 'OK'. > >"Should be no problem. What show?" > >HOOOOORAY!! I was cheering for her fatigue. > >"We will decide what show tomorrow. Anyway what's important is >watching with who, not the show." > >Tye's favourite line, I was just borrowing it. > >"You should go sleep now lah." I continued. > >"Wait one little while. You haven't tell me you tired or not?" > >"Ok lah, A bit. You leh?" > >"I am exhausted but have to say good night to you first, Slorr, if >not I can't sleep." > >"Me too." > >I can't believe I am doing this silly business right now. > >"Ok I tell you what. I count 1,2,3. Then we log off together." > >"Ok.. good night, Slorr." > >"Same to you" > >"1..." > >"2..." > >"3..." >�. >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ >I never talk whenever I am inside a cinema, and now is the best time >for my mouth to rest, so I spent the following 3 hours to admire >this much-talked-about movie of the century, Titanic. > >I am not a romantic person, so it's perfectly understandable if I >can't really appreciate this motion picture fully, except for all >those stunning special effects. But what Jack said to Rose before he >sank into the deep ocean struck me.... > >"Rose, listen to me... listen. Winning that ticket was the best >thing that had happened to me.. It brought me to you.. and I am >thankful, Rose.. I am thankful.." > >Suddenly I felt much fortunate than Jack, because I don't have to >risk my life to board Titanic, all I have to do is to switch on my >PC every night. But he's one lucky guy too, because he knows how to >draw, and just looking at how slowly he was drawing Rose, made me >blame myself for the lack of this talent. But to FlyNDance, this >movie wasn't just about drawings or special effects. I noticed that >packet of tissue paper she was holding in her hand, and just when >Rose said: "I promise... I will never let go, Jack... i'll never let >go..", she opened up her sling bag and out comes the reserve >handkerchief. Damn that Celine Dion. Why on earth did she had to >sing that "MY HEART WILL GO ON� at the end of the show? For all the >female species inside the theater, it�s like "MY TEARS WILL ALSO GO >ON". > >"Ok, movie ended. Let's go." > >I stood up, spoke to her gently, worried that every single word I >breathe out might just crush onto her, and kill her. She continued >to sit in that position, looked at me with her beautiful eyes that >seemed to have just come back from a swim. After a while, she said: >"Slorr, movie ended, but life goes on. Am I right?" > > >I nodded my head. But I just wished somebody could give me some clue >of what she was talking about. Finally, we managed to leave Orchard >Cineplex, and since it�s still early, we decided to take a walk down >the street. > >Along the way, she seemed unusually quiet. I guess Tye was right >about the 'Titanic Flu'. He said that gals often got so mentally >distressed after watching this show, and it's the best time to >launch an emotional attack on her. That's why Tye had watch Titanic >for over 5 times roughly. > >Her eyes were focused on the path or the crowds, but I know her mind >was still left on Titanic, sinking with her, waiting for somebody to >pull her up. I just kept my mouth shut. I know I am not a good >swimmer. We walked to Plaza Singapura. Suddenly, she stopped in >front of a Christian Dior counter. > >"Slorr, have you read a novel called 'Fragrance'?" > >"Err..nope. Why do you ask?" > >"Look at this 'Dolce Vita' from Christian Dior. It's what the guy >bought for her girlfriend in the story on her birthday. And he told >her �Dolce Vita is french, meaning 'sweet times'." > >She pointed to a bottle of perfume at the counter, but I was more >interested in the price tag around the neck of the bottle. > >"Oh... is it?" > >"Slorr, then do you consider today as 'sweet times'?" > >"At first I do, but some points were deducted since you started >crying." > >"That means it can only be considered a little bit sweet. I'll buy >the small bottle then." > >I insisted to pay for the perfume as her birthday present from me >since I knew her birthday was coming soon. This kind of saves me a >lot of trouble of finding a present for her. Luckily it's just >perfume, or I would have to pawn my underwear if that guy in the >story had given her girlfriend diamond or gold bar. > >"Are you hungry? Wanna sit down and have something?" I asked her. > >"I don't have appetite.. What about you?" > >"You eat, I eat..." > >Her eyes got red again. I am such a fool. Finally, we got away from >the noisy crowd at the MRT station, walking on one of the streets of >AMK Ave 6. Contrastingly, it's so quiet now that I even can hear the >rhythm of her heartbeat. > >"Slorr, do you know what's the correct way of applying perfume?" > >I shook my head. In fact, I had never used a perfume or cologne >before, only medicated oil maybe. > >"First you apply some behind your ears, then your neck and wrists. >After that spray some into the air, then walk through it." > >"Sure or not? In that case this little bottle won't be able to last >you even for 3 days." > >"Slorr, shall we try?" > >"We? You go ahead. I am a man." > >She opened up that DOLCE VITA, sprayed behind her ears, neck then >the wrist, and she really did spray some into the air!! Wabiangz!! >Expensive leh! Finally she stretched out her hands, facing up, as if >enjoying the raindrops falling on her face. > >"Hahaha...." I chuckled. > >"Slorr, this is so fun! Now its your turn." > >She helped me and went through the same procedures with me and I >could feel the coldness of her fingers. Maybe it's the perfume, I >guess. > >"Slorr, get ready, I am going to spray!!" > >I imitated her. Face up and walked through my first perfume rain. > >"Slorr let's have another round!!" > >"What!! Serious?" > >My money isn't easy to come by leh!! Before I could collect the >broken pieces of my heart, she had already walked through her second >round. She was even more excited this time, hoping around, just like >her nickname. A gracefully flying and dancing butterfly. In the late >night at AMK, the street smells unusually nicer right now. Until we >finished the whole of that DOLCE VITA. > >"DOLCE VITA is exhausted." I declared. > >"I guess this sweet time shall end now too. Slorr, I'll go up now. >Tonight, at 1 am, I won't be online, and you are not to do so too." > >"Huh? But why?" > >"Go online at 12pm tomorrow. You will know.. Remember, only at >12pm..." > >She turned and walked into the lift. At the same time, I saw an >obvious pink patch behind her neck, which is visible only because >she tied her hair up. I looked up towards her window on the 4th >floor from below, but it never lit up. >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ >I switched off the light in my room. Engulfed in the absolute >darkness. I wished to have the same kind of feeling as her right >now. I realized that in complete darkness, the easiest mood one >gets... is loneliness. She must be lonely right now, half asleep. > >I could almost see a beautiful butterfly, turning to ashes amidst >the sea of flame. And that patch behind her neck.. from pink it >became red. Then burgundy. Slowly, it swallowed me. I was very >curious. What was that pink patch? Was it the cause of that can of >beer just now? I didn�t know then. > >Suddenly I felt cold and shaky. And that coldness seemed to have >come straight from my heart. The rate of my heartbeat was an >exponential function of time as it got closer to 1 am.. > >USE A DIFFERENT NICK!! > >I went online and checked.. She wasn't there. My heart was beating >fast. But the temperature remained below healthy level.... > > >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > >Finally it�s 12 p.m.. Excited as I was, I logged onto the net, yet >there was still no sign of FlyNDance. However there's a mail from >her: > > > >Dear Slorr, >At first I thought it will be easier for me to settle down in the >darkness.. recollecting memories we have shared... but all I felt >was loneliness..... Can you feel it too?... > >I still can't change the habit of logging on at 1am... so I used a >different nick to sneak into #AJCRR... you don't blame me >right?...:P... you weren�t there... Should I feel glad for your >obedience?.... You said both of us belonged to TYPE 2... the foolish >type...maybe you are right!... 'COs I really do admire those who >dares to fight for their desires... I stroked my hair gently when >you said that I am leaving the world... and a few strands of hair >fell... No!... Doctor told me its not a terminal disease... and >doctor aren't supposed to lie?!!... I still can live like a normal >person...can I? > >FlyNDance... is it really something I wont be able to do?... After >the first meeting with you at Mac... I started to realize that you >are not only a virtual being living in the cyberspace... In reality >you are strong, gentle and sensitive.... I can feel the defense wall >of my heart slowly breaking apart... I am defeated... I tied my hair >today.. 'cos my fren told me that I look more attractive this way... > >I want you to remember my face as it is today... 'cos after today... >everything may change.... But why didn't you ask for my real name? >That�s why I never asked for urs... I am a girl mah..:P... do you >realize how I wish to have something more than a nick to take along >with me? ...Slorr... thank you for the DOLCE VITA. Finally got a >taste of what sweet times are like... but I am really sorry.. I just >couldn�t bear to say goodbye.... but.. > >Since it started from a mail.... it should end with a mail too.... >Its been 3 months and 2 days since the very first mail... not a very >long time but it isn't short either.... Our story began from me... >and I will end it.. > >Maybe it�s what you said... 'Internet is fast and convenient, but it >isn't perfect'.... I can send you my thoughts right away... but not >my tears... >It�s about 5.30am now.... time to go.... by the time you receive >this mail... >I would be trying to settle down somewhere else... I don't know... >Good Bye.. > >With lotsa love, >FlyNDance > > > >After reading her mail, I felt as if I had just experienced a >roller-coaster ride which almost derailed. She had shown me the >other side of her, the soft and sensitive her. > >For a couple of months, I was trying to hypnotize myself, to >suppress my feelings whenever I started to think about her again, >telling myself I don�t like her and I don�t miss her. Perpetually, I >was telling myself, she is just one virtual character that fly and >dance in the net, but never in the real world. I became a fugitive, >escaping from my PC, escaping from the Internet and anything that >has to do with coffee. Hid myself behind the piles of lecture notes, >behind the crowd of people, trying to get rid of the thought of >missing something in life. But I failed. I found out that it�s not >that I don't miss her, its just that I had forgotten the passion >that always come along when you have someone hanging on your mind >all the time. It�s like I cannot breathe.. it�s like I had forgotten >the fact that I have been breathing in and out for the past 19 >years. > >I can hold my breath for a while, but not forever. >I had to find her! >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ >"Err... I am looking for ... er.. FlyNDance...." > >"HUH??..." > >'Huh', this is the exact words I was expecting from her. > >She seemed to be FlyNDance's elder sister, 20++, looked quite a >beauty too even without any makeup. But of course, still can't be >compared with her. I explained to her my purpose for knocking on the >door and told her that I am no stalker whom she might think I am. > >Surprisingly, when I told her my disgusting nick, Slorr, she >appeared to be rather excited and she quickly scribbled something on >a small piece of paper and handed it to me. > >"You should go and see her. SGH, Room 3-425." > > >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ >This is the first time I've ever stepped into the Singapore General >Hospital. It's a dust-free space, everything looked so clean, tidy >and arranged. But I don't like the feeling it gave me... I entered >room 3-425. She was there, in a deep sleep. I stood by her, >watching. Her hair was still as long as before, laying across the >soft, white pillow. >Her face looked roundish now, I know it's the side-effect of the >medicine. And the pinkish-red patch that was on her neck, had spread >to her face appearing in the shape of a butterfly. > >Nevertheless, she was still the most beautiful butterfly I've ever >seen. > >Her eyelashes twitched slightly. She must be dreaming.. What's that >in her dream? McDonald's fries and coke? Sinking Titanic? Or the >rain at AMK Ave 6? >The room was getting darker as the clock approaches 6pm. I wanted to >switch on the light. I hate to see her lying lonely under the shadow >of a patient's room. But I am worried that her dreams might be >disturbed by the sudden light rays. While I was in a dilemma, her >eyes opened slowly. Her eyes were wide on me, then she turned away >suddenly. > >I could only see her back at this moment. She lost weight. After a >long time, she turned to face me again, rubbed her eyes and >smiled.... > >"Slorr, you are here!" > >"Yes, nice weather today, isn't it?" > >"Ya lor, sky also very chio today? Right? Heehee.." > >Sky very chio... > >I can still remember that this was the conversation we had in one of >our AJCRR meetings.. But she didn't realize that it's raining today. > >"Slorr, why are you standing there? Sit down." > >�Thanks for reminding me.. I just found out that my legs were numbed >due to the several hours of standing.� > >"Slorr, you lost weight." > >Me? I thought I should be the one who's telling this to her!? > >"Slorr, you hungry? Had your lunch? Food here isn't so good. That's >why patients like me always slim down a bit. Apart from that, it's >quite ok. But sometimes I feel really bored without a PC here to >talk to you.." > >"Slorr, how's your mid-year? Sure did very well right?" she >continued.. > >Wait a minute! You are the one who's lying on bed right now not me! >Yet, I had nothing to ask her.. Because I was there to see her, not >to find out the answers to those questions. Maybe now it�s the time >for me to utter some touching lines like what�s in the case of a >movie.. But I am not a romantic person... moreover... > >Movies are fiction. Life isn't. > > >I just wished that she could leave this place as soon as possible, >back to AMK Ave 6, back to ACJC, back to where she belonged. And I >promised she won�t be alone anymore, because I will always be there. > >After a while, her mum was here to see her. Around the age of 50, >slightly overweight. Other than the cheerful smile, she didn't >really remind me of FlyNDance. > >"Err, I think i've gotta go now. Bye bye auntie." > >"You....You..." > >FlyNDance sat up straight in a sudden, as if she'd experienced a >tremendous shock. > >"I'll be here again tomorrow.. and the day after tomorrow... until >you leave this place..." > >Before I went back home, I went to Plaza Singapura again to buy that >Christian Dior Dolce Vita... and I've got the biggest bottle this >time, one that she can even swim in it. > >I tried not to close my eyes that night. I want to go to her as soon >as the first sun ray shoots into my room.... >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ >"Slorr.. you are here.. i've been waiting for you for a long >time..." > >"Had a good night's rest...?" > >"Oh... I didn't allow myself to fall into a deep sleep because I >know you won't wake me up when your here." > >"Then you should take a rest now.." > >"Err, since you are here already, I don't think I can..." > >I gave her the Dolce Vita, and we'd agreed that we would dance in >the rain in front of SGH main entrance the day she's discharged. > >I dare not look straight at her, because there's a butterfly on her >face. It was only last night before I leave SGH that I found out >she's suffering from an illness called ERYSIPELAS. What the >clergymen would term the Butterfly Disease... > >But what I like is the �coffee butterfly� her that is able to dance >around freely, and not that pinkish-red butterfly that settled on >her pale complexion. Moreover, what�s a butterfly if it can't fly? > >"Slorr, why are you looking at me and not talking?" > >I don't know, because I noticed that she's getting weaker >physically. I had a bad feeling about this. > >"Slorr, I am thirsty, can you get me a drink?" > >I am not leaving her at this moment. I can still remember a movie >about this guy who went all the way to get red bean soup for his >girlfriend who's on sickbed and to find her lying silently on the >white bedsheet when he came back... never to wake up again... > >"Are you trying to get rid of me, like what's in that movie?" > >"Slorr, movie is movie, life is life..." > >Movie? Life?.... > >"But I thought you just had a drink? Anyway, so what can I get for >you?" > >"Ultimate Ice Blended!!" > >This is a hospital leh!! Did she think I could find Coffee Bean >everywhere on this island? What's more, coffee wasn't suitable for >her at that time. > >"Err... coffee isn't good for health, order something else, ok? > >"So you know coffee isn't good for the body too. Then you should cut >down on your intake also, ok?" > >I saw her smile appearing and there's a shine in her eyes. I >realized that she�s just trying to tell me not to drink too much >coffee in the future. > >My heart seemed to have suffered from a heavy blow. This is not >good. A taste of pH7 has started to fill my nose. If this is not >going to stop, tears might be the next thing that appear in front of >her. I recalled the chapter on reservoir and dam in the physics >textbook. Quickly applied the knowledge of the dam on myself. >Blocking the flow, even if it's just a few droplets. > >"Ok, I promise. I'll try my best." > >"And try to sleep earlier in the future and don't skip breakfast... >It's important to you and don't be too obsessed with blue. It makes >you look troubled and....." > >This didn't sound good. It's like giving the final instructions >before she.. I can't bear to let her continue. > >"Ok ok, I'll go get you a drink right away." > >"Slorr, is the machine far away? If it is, then its ok, I don't want >it anymore." > >From my mental calculation, men would take 67 steps while women >would take 85 steps to reach the vending machine right at that >corner. Plus the time taken to purchase, average would take a total >of 1.8 to 2.1 minutes. Not very far. > >"Quite near." > >"Slorr, come back quick. I don't want to be alone for too long... I >hate that feeling." > >I didn't answer her. I just increased my pace.... > >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > > >"Eh boy ah... it�s late already... go to sleep.." my mum was nagging >at me again. > >"Ok ok.... 10 more minutes..." > >Until today, FlyNDance had left me for more than 2 mths. > >I still logged on at 1 am every night, but onto the channel >#DOLCE-VITA which was created by myself, with Slorr and FlyNDance >being the only 2 nicks inside, for 10 minutes. Although she won't be >able to fly and dance in real life anymore, but I still wish that >she could continue to do so in the virtual world. > >Even Tye has given up on me... > >"She's gone, why are you still doing this? For what!!?" > >Yet, even if that's the case, I can't allow her soul to be left in >the corner of loneliness. Because she said she hated the feeling of >being alone.. >I still remember there was a heavy downpour on that very day. When I >reached SGH, they told me... that a coffee butterfly flew away from >her room at around 1 am last night.. > >After that... I couldn�t remember... > >I just knew that I stood at the bus-stop for a whole day and I was >all wet because of the rain. Even my face was moist.. > >I've been trying hard not to think of her over the past 2 months. >I've been hoping that her face won't appear in my mind every moment >that I breathe, but my wish is equivalent to hoping that the sky >isn't blue; the grass isn't green; the stars do not twinkle at >night... Basically, I was hoping for something impossible to happen. >I can't believe that I am of Type 2, even in real life. Foolish. > >Did I cry?.. No Way!.. > >I said it before, I am not a romantic person, and this may be due to >the deficiency in the hormones that constitutes emotions. Whenever I >had the feeling of pH7, I'll browse through those �Fwd:jokes...' >email. Attention will then be shifted by those dim-wit, low-class >jokes... > >So now everything is back to the way it was before I met her 9 mths >ago. Tye is still flirting around, and I am still the old decent, >dull me. But I�ve stopped taking coffee and beer. >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > >"Xing ah, is this for you?" > >My mum handed me a letter she picked up in the mailbox this morning. > >I was surprised when I saw 'To:slorr...' written on the envelope. > >That's for me I guess. I opened it up, and there was a piece of >writing inside, and another coffee envelope.. > > > >Slorr, >I am FlyNDance's sister, I think this is how you are addressing her. >I am sorry that I do not know your real name, although we'd met >before. > >When I was packing her stuffs a few days ago, I found this letter >with your name and address already written on it. So I posted it to >you, because I believe this is what my sister intended to do. > >Best wishes, >Xiao Wen > > > >The letter was sent 3 days ago, and there was another: > >'To:slorr...�, > >followed by my home address written on the coffee envelope. But this >handwriting was a lot nicer and the words seemed to be moving >swiftly...like in a joyful dance. > >I had no time to figure out how she gott my home address. Did I give >her in one of my mails? > >I tried to control my trembling hands. Slowly, I opened up the >envelope. I found a photo, and half of a movie ticket was inside. >Apart from these, there was a blue letter... with the familiar DOLCE >VITA smell on it. The photo showed her standing on a piece of >grassland, wearing the same coffee theme attire on our first meeting >at McDonalds. Something was written at the back of the envelope.... > > > >Dear slorr, >Coffee represents Pisces.. that's me. Blue represents Sagitarius.. >that's you. A blue letter inside a coffee envelope.... know what I >mean? > >Seeing me, do you feel like drinking coffee now? Stop drooling! :P > >FlyNDance > > > >I smiled.... bitterly. The contents of the blue letter is simple: > > > >If I have one more day to live, I want to be your girlfriend. Do I >have one more day? No. Too bad. I can't be your girlfriend... not in >this life. > >If I have wings, I want to fly down from the paradise just to see >you. Do I have wings? No. Sadly. I can never see you again. > >If all the water are drawn out of the bath-tub, but it still can't >put off the flame of love btw us. Can all the water in a bath-tub be >drawn off? Can. > >So yes. I Love You. > >FlyNDance > > > >My chest was torn apart... Tears broke through the dam I constructed >a long time ago. > >As proud, as emotionless as I was, I couldn�t pull back the salty >wetness that�d spread to the whole of my face anymore. She has >changed my 'little theory' and gotten back what I'd owed her... >Tears for 2 months....
