They�d been going out for a year. Exactly. It seemed like only yesterday when she�d first met him.
*******
�Gabry, I don�t want to go! How many times have I told you that I�m not one of your little teenybopper friends! You�ve got billions of people that wanted this ticket but you had to take me with you?! What the hell for?�
�Because I love you and because you need to see for yourself what great singers these guys are!�
Tessa glared at her best friend, Gabrielle. Since third grade, they�d done the same things, gone the same places, and liked the same music. Until now. Gabrielle had slowly turned into a full-fledged pop maniac. While Tessa was still listening to her same angst-ridden rock, Gabry had turned to Ricky Martin, Britney Spears, and Robbie Williams for her musical needs. Last month, she�d called the local top 40 radio station non-stop for tickets to the *NSYNC concert. Tessa told repeatedly that she wouldn�t win, but the girl just kept on calling. Eventually, she got through and somehow won the tickets. And two backstage passes. How she did it, Tessa will never know, but she did. And she wanted her best friend on her arm when she got there.
�Please, don�t make me go to this. I will love you forever if you just turn this car around and let me go home.�
�You�ll love me forever anyway.� Gabrielle retorted.
Tessa sneered. �No. No, I won�t.�
�Yes, you will. Well, lookie here! Anderson Stadium! Let�s go!�
Tessa rolled her eyes and reluctantly got out of the car. When the girls found their seats, Tessa sat down with a huff. The lights soon went out and the screaming began almost instantly. Gabrielle stood up and cheered for the five flimsy guys that were dangling from the ceiling dressed in what looked like sparkly rags. A young girl, who looked no more than 10 years old screamed out at the stage,
�Joey! I want to have your baby!�
Tessa rolled her eyes again and crossed her arms. Knowing she wouldn�t be able to get any sleep in the midst of this �concert�, she gazed up at the sky above the stadium and began counting the stars.
About an hour and a half later, Gabry pulled on her friend�s arm.
�Tess, it�s time to go backstage!�
�No! It�s not over yet!�
�It ain�t over till the fat lady sings, baby.�
An exceedingly large man walked to the two girls and asked if they were Gabrielle Hirsch and Tessa Spencer. They snickered and nodded as he led them through countless corridors and finally to a room marked �MEET & GREET�. Tessa snorted and clapped her hands together, �Alright. Let�s meet �em, greet �em, and get he hell outta here.� The bodyguard chuckled and pat her on the back before lightly pushing them into the room, �Joey�s gonna like you.�
�Joey is gonna like who?� an impish looking man with red hair, a grin, and a goatee asked. �Hey, I�m Gabrielle. Your bodyguard was talking about my friend here.� She smiled when the guys met them at the door. JC, Justin, Lance, Chris, and Joey all shook hands with her and then looked expectantly at the curly-haired brunette at the door. Tessa glanced at all of them, wondering how she got here. They looked like fairly normal human beings. Even if their music sucks, they�re personalities shouldn�t be all that bad, she thought to herself.
�I�m Tessa. Gabry dragged me here.� Chris smiled.
�Are you hinting that you�re not a fan?�
�No, I�m saying it straight out. I just sat through an hour and a half of screaming and pyrotechnics and you�ve still done nothing to show me that you guys are true musicians.�
All of them coughed slightly and looked to each other, none knowing what to say to this seemingly rude girl. Joey was the only one she didn�t intimidate with her disliking of their music. He stuck his hand out for her to take.
�Hi, I�m Joey.� Tessa looked down at his outstretched appendage and tiredly licked her lips. When she didn�t shake his hand, he cleared his throat and put it back in his pocket.
�So, you�re Joey, eh?� He nodded.
�There was a girl out there. Apparently, she wants to have your baby. What do you know about that?�
He blushed slightly and Tessa couldn�t help but smile at his embarrassment.
�I dunno too much about that. I try not to corrupt the youth of America by courting the young�ns that come to our concerts.�
She nodded. �Ahh, I see. Well, if you don�t court them, who do you court?�
He looked shyly at her.
�I�d like to court you.�
*******
After that first meeting, Tessa and Joey soon starting dating. It was the oddest of couples. Tessa was sarcastic and cynical. Joey was happy-go-lucky and charming. Tessa hated cuddling. Joey was the epitome of touchy-feeliness. Tessa liked to stay in and read Plato. Joey liked to go out and drink. Tessa liked the brown M&Ms. Joey liked the red. But despite their innumerable differences, they managed to stay together, seeing each other as often as his schedule would allow. Joey grew to love the way Tessa would roll her eyes and push him away anytime he�d tell her she was beautiful and Tessa grew to love the way Joey smiled at her as if she were the only person in the world. Every thirty days, it had become a ritual for Joey to fly out from wherever he was to be with her. Their monthly anniversaries turned into something both of them looked forward to. They could be together without the bothers of band mates, best friends, diehard fans, and schoolwork and could just be themselves. They could be the people they fell in love with. He would flake out on her sometimes, choosing to go to the local bar instead of her Chicago apartment. He would get drunk and come to her and she would take care of him. She had to. He was the man she loved.
But the man Tessa had fallen in love with was nowhere to be seen. He was now almost four hours late and Tessa�s patience was wearing thin. She had been sitting alone at a candlelit table covered with plates of angel hair pasta and steak since sundown, telling herself it was just the traffic. Traffic didn�t last for four hours.
Tessa sighed and let her head fall to the table and after another fifteen minutes of waiting, she blew out the candles and walked to the bedroom to put on her pajamas. She plopped down on the bed and her ears perked up when she heard the jingling of keys outside the front door. She was extremely angry, but coming late was better than not coming at all. She grinned and ran to the door when she heard it open, only to have the smile wiped off her face when met with the sight before her.
It was Joey. That much was true. But it wasn�t the Joey she had fallen in love with. His shirt was backwards, his hair messy and flat, and his breath reeked of tequila. He had gotten drunk. On their anniversary.
�Lucy! I�m hooooooome.� He slurred. Tessa crossed her arms in front of her chest and glared at him. She knew it would do no good to sermon him when he was this plastered, but she couldn�t help herself. He was long overdue for a good tongue-lashing and there was no way his drunken ass could get out of it tonight.
�Do you have any idea what day it is?� she scolded. She was trying to keep her temper but it just wasn�t working.
�Of course I do, honey!� he produced a limp bouquet of weeds from behind his back.
�Happy anniversary, baby. Now come �ere and give your daddy a kiss.� He lunged for her and Tessa moved in time for him to miss her completely and fall right onto the hardwood floor. He groaned and threw the sad bouquet across the room.
�What the hell�d you that for?!�
�Because you deserved it!� she picked him up with a strength she didn�t even know she had and pushed him onto the brown leather sofa. Joey tenderly rubbed his nose and looked up at her with the most pathetic expression she�d ever seen.
�Do you understand what an ass you are?� he shook his head. �You showed up FOUR HOURS late to your own 1st year anniversary! And drunk, no less! What the hell were you thinking when you went out and drunk your heart out instead of meeting your girlfriend on what�s supposed to be a special day for both of us? What the hell were you thinking when you came to me all those other times after you�d gotten sloppy drunk out of your mind expecting me to take care of you like you were my son? Why do you take advantage of me? You know I love you endlessly, but then you always have to go and pull some shit like this! Were you expecting to live your entire life with people taking care of your every need? Were you expecting everyone to fawn on you and act like you�re the fucking messiah? Well, news flash, honey, you�re not. And I�m sick of this!�
Joey looked away. His heart aching and his head pounding. Half from regret, half from the bottle of hard liquored he�d just downed.
�I�m sick of you and your needs. What about me, Goddammit? What about my needs? Just because I sit around and watch football with you on our anniversaries doesn�t mean I don�t want to be loved like every other fucking girl out there! Just because I�m tough and independent doesn�t mean I don�t want someone to lean on every now and then! I�m sick of being the one you always come to with your problems! What about my problems? Do you think I�m so stable and secure that I don�t have any? I do! And you�ve become one of them! I�m sick of having to be your rock! I�m sick of being the designated driver in this relationship! Why can�t you take some goddamn responsibility every now and then? Huh?!�
Joey looked back at Tessa. She now had tears streaming freely down her cheeks. All he wanted to do was take her in his arms and tell her he�d never hurt her again. Tell her everything would be alright. But deep down inside, he knew everything wouldn�t be alright. He knew he would hurt her again because that�s what he did. He burned the people he loved most without even realizing it. Well, he realized it. Of course, it was always too late when he did. Now was one of those times. Tessa had come into his life at a time when he felt there was no one else. For the first few months, he loved the monthly get-togethers. He loved the nightly calls. He loved sending her flowers and all that lovey-dovey crap. But as time wore on, he started dodging her calls. He stopped sending her chocolates and jewelry. He stopped giving. And in return, she was forced to give more and more. The one sidedness of the relationship drove her crazy, but she couldn�t tell him that. No, no. She couldn�t tell him because she suddenly had to be the strong one.
Now that Joey knew just how much strain he had put on the girl he thought he loved more than life itself, all he wanted to do was jump out of that window over there. He hated himself. He hated himself for pushing such a beautiful person into the depths of despair she must be in. He hated himself for slowly extinguishing the fire inside such a powerful person so that now, she couldn�t even look at him without crying even more. He hated himself for turning his own lover into the insecure, drained, and physically and emotionally tired woman she had become.
�Tessa, I�m so-�
�Shut up!� she interrupted hotly before taking a few deep breaths. She closed her eyes and pushed out the words that should have been said a long time ago.
�Joey. You told me when we first started going out that this would be hard. You told me that just being who you are would make this harder than it should have to be. But you also told me that you would do everything in your power to help us stay together. You told me that you would help me help us stay together. Do you know what I�ve been doing for the past six months?� he shook his head. �I�ve been single handedly keeping us together. I was the one was kept calling when you stopped. I was the one that started sending gifts when you stopped. I was the one who helped you get back on your feet after a long day at rehearsals. I was the one who helped you sober up when you got drunk and came to me. I was the one that loved you when you stopped loving me.�
Joey winced. Even though he knew it was the truth, no one ever said the truth didn�t hurt.
�Now, I really thought we could make it. I thought I was strong enough to do this by myself but then I realized I shouldn�t need to be strong enough to do this by myself. I realized that you�re supposed to be strong with me. When I realized that, I knew the flame had burned out. As much as I hate to say this, Joe, there�s nothing left.�
Joey got up from the sofa and walked to his girlfriend. While putting his arms around her, he pleaded forgiveness.
�Tessa, don�t say that. There�s something left! The fire�s not gone, I still love you! And you still love me! We can fix this, it can�t end now. Not after all we�ve put into it. You�ve gotta take me back. Please, Tess. I dunno what I�ll do if you don�t take me back. I love you so much.� He sobbed as he pushed a few loose strands of her chestnut hair behind her ear. He dragged a tired finger down her wet cheek and over her lips. He looked into her chocolate eyes and drew in a sharp breath when he saw nothing behind them. He started crying uncontrollably and kissed her, struggling with all he had to bring back the love they�d lost. She made no move to return the passion he was trying so hard to show and that broke his heart even more. It was only then that he realized no more words were needed. He kissed her lips once more before backing away from her and bending over to pick up his wilted bouquet. He moved to the door and looked over his shoulder at the girl he once loved before walking into the hallway and closing the door behind him. Once outside, he leaned back against her door and stared pitifully at the ceiling. He shook his head and closed his eyes,
�You were supposed to be the one that saves me.�
With one last tear, Joey wiped his face and walked out of the building.
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