Another concert had just ended. Another concert in another city. It was the same as any other day, but for one of them it couldn�t have been more different. Four of the five went about their normal post-show routines. But one was lost in his thoughts. Usually, after a concert, they acted as separate parts of a whole. Tonight, the whole was missing a piece altogether.
He sat in a chair, that lumpy, uncomfortable dressing room chair, but he didn�t feel the discomfort. Chris and Lance wrestled each other over the television remote control right at his feet, but they may as well have been in another country.
He sighed and ran a hand through his hard-as-rock, hairspray-coated curls.
Joey watched the two on the floor, cheering them on for awhile, but he soon lost interest and went to watch TV, flipping the channels by hand, seeing as the remote was otherwise engaged.
The man in the chair threw his head back and closed his eyes, groaning softly.
JC paced at the other end of the room. Usually, it would be a safe bet to say that he was writing a new song in his head or working the kinks out of one of his existing masterpieces. This was always a great way for him to wind down. He had the most inspiration after the pure excitement that a performance gave him. It was a toss up, but of all five of them, either he or Justin got the biggest high from performing.
But tonight was different. Normally, Justin would be sitting in a corner, headphones over ears, totally engulfed in a world where only music mattered. Tonight, no music could help him wind down. Tonight, music couldn�t take him away from the real world.
Tonight, Justin sat there, oblivious as usual. But this was not a healthy oblivious.
There was another change, too. JC, while still pacing, had lost focus. He was watching his friend in the chair. Sometimes, Justin worried him.
Justin didn�t notice the wrestling match. He didn�t notice the smug look on Joey�s face. He didn�t notice the look of concern that JC was sending his way.
He thought of only one thing.
Her.
She had been on his mind for days now. She was all he could think of.
�Justin. Hey, Justin?� JC had approached him and stood directly to his left.
Justin didn�t hear, apparently. His eyes were still closed; his mind filled with only her.
The smug look fell from Joey�s face. He looked at the two in confusion for a moment before rising to his feet and walking over. He stood to Justin�s right.
Both men questioned, �Justin?�
No response.
She wasn�t even his �type� exactly. She would hardly be considered beautiful by most. Some may not even find her all that attractive. But to Justin, she was the most gorgeous creature to have ever walked the Earth.
The wrestling ceased, the forgotten remote falling to the floor.
�Justin?� Four voices all spoke this time, in perfect unison as they had been so diligently trained.
Still no response.
�Justin?!?� They spoke louder this time, and he was finally broken from his trance.
�What?� He asked, confusion evident in his reply, and on his face.
Lance and Chris looked at each other and shrugged. Joey grinned, patted the younger man on the head, and commented, �We thought we�d lost you for good this time.�
�No such luck,� added Chris.
Lance just laughed.
Justin swatted at them, and they retreated back to the television area.
Only JC remained. �Are you ok, man?�
�Sure, Jace. I�m fine.�
�Well, ok. If you�re sure. You�ve just been a little�distant, these past couple of days.�
Justin groaned inwardly. He should have known that JC would pick up on this. Why did he always have to be so damn perceptive?
�I�m fine, Jace. Really. Just a little tired�or something.� He tried to be convincing, but he knew that JC wouldn�t be fooled by any means.
JC decided to let it go for the time being. �Ok, J. I�m here if you need to talk or whatever.�
�Thanks Jace.� JC had always been like an older brother to Justin. Sometimes that didn�t work in his favor. Especially when he wanted to keep his thoughts to himself.
JC nodded his head slightly and moved back to the other side of the room, his eyes never leaving his friend.
Justin went back to his thoughts. He could picture her so vividly, though he hadn�t even met her. He�d only seen her from across a crowded room. But their eyes had locked for what seemed like an eternity and was really only less than a minute.
He didn�t know whether to thank JC for dragging him to that jazz club or to be pissed at him. It didn�t really matter though. The damage had already been done.
From the second he'd seen her, he'd felt an energy so strong that it seemed to make his whole world vibrate and every fiber of his body and soul reach out for her.
But the next thing he knew, she was gone. He had glanced away for a moment, and when he looked back, she had disappeared. He had searched the club for any trace of her, but she was nowhere to be found. He hadn�t even learned her name.
That had been Saturday night. Today was Thursday. They were scheduled to be in New York for a week. This was their last night in the city. Once he left New York, he didn�t know if he would ever see her again.
He had a feeling this wasn�t the end though.
Justin had been to that jazz club twice since that night, knowing full well that she wouldn�t be there. Since that night, he had been feeling that energy, pulling him to God knows where. But he�d been resisting the pull. He had commitments to the group that kept him busy, and he couldn�t very well explain to everyone that he needed to go somewhere, but he didn�t know quite where.
The feeling was stronger tonight than it had been so far. It was so strong that he couldn�t ignore it anymore. He couldn�t deny this feeling. He had to follow his instincts. Now was the time. Tonight.
Determined, he cleared his thoughts and surveyed the room.
Lance reentered the room, having left several minutes earlier. Justin hadn�t seen him leave, naturally.
Lance had gone to see if the coast was clear, if they could go back to the hotel now. He came back with news that it was time to leave. Four of them started towards the door. Justin remained in his seat. They turned back towards their friend.
�Aren�t you coming, Justin?�
�No, I�m not going back to the hotel. At least, not yet.�
JC waved the others past him with a sigh. �Justin, what�s going on?�
Justin chuckled. If he could pull this off, he�d consider himself a master schemist. He wasn�t going to even bother lying to JC though. He would see right through the lie. �Well, Jace. I have something I need to do. Some place I need to go, rather. So I�m not going back to the hotel at the moment.�
�Right, like security is going to let you get out of here alone.�
Justin grinned. �That�s where you come in.�
JC cringed. �I was afraid of that.�
�Just tell them I�m staying here to take a shower before I go back. Tell them I want to be alone for awhile. I really am going to take a shower and change. I�m just going to slip out the back and into my beautiful getaway car when I�m finished.�
�You have a car?�
�Sure. You know. The company car that they always have on hand for us. It�s parked out back and the keys are�� He paused and fished around in his pocket. �Right here. You never know when that car will come in handy.�
JC shook his head, laughing. �Ok, but I make no promises that they�ll believe me. Where are you going, in case we need to find you.�
�I�m not exactly sure. Plus, it�s better if you don�t know. Then they can�t drag it out of you and follow me.�
�I don�t like this, J. But it seems like it�s pretty important to you, so I�ll go along with it. You better come back like your old self. I�m assuming this thing you have to do involves the thing that you�ve been thinking about for the past few days.�
Justin nodded. �Thanks, Jace. I�ll see you later.�
�Later, man.�
About a half-hour later, Justin was refreshed from his shower and ready to put his plan into action. His curls were now hairspray-free, and his clothes resembled actual human clothing: khakis and a long sleeved Abercrombie T-shirt. He pulled a fisherman�s hat on, making sure to conceal all curls from the random lurking teeny, and found his sneakers in a corner, where he had flung them earlier.
He checked to make sure the dressing room door was tightly locked. Reassured, he tried to decide if they�d be waiting outside the rear entrance. He realized that Mike had probably stayed behind to wait for him. Mike would expect an ulterior motive.
�That man knows me too well.�
He looked around for another escape. There seemed to be two options: going through a window or exiting through an adjoining dressing room.
The window looked pretty small.
He knocked on the door connecting to the next room and was received by silence. Easing the door open slowly, he peeked through to find the dressing room deserted. He entered that room, securing the door behind him.
After continuing through two more adjoining rooms, he decided he was safe and made his exit from the building, slipping carefully past anyone who might recognize him and blow his cover. He located the car and quickly slipped inside, making his way out of the parking lot, onto the main road, and on to wherever he happened to be going.
Knowing full well that she wouldn�t be there, he stopped by the jazz club, �just in case.� He needed to rationalize this. He needed to believe that he had some degree of control over the situation at hand, even if he was fully aware that he had no control whatsoever.
Whatever this was that had been pulling at him all week, it was something bigger than him. Much bigger. And quite frankly, he was scared shitless.
He entered the jazz club, scanning every inch for some sign of her presence. He found none. He did however find a couple of girls in their early twenties looking his way. And giggling. Giggling was a sure sign of recognition. Or maybe he was being paranoid. But still. This was no time for distractions.
He got his ass out of there quite fast.
He returned to the car and just sat there. There was no logical way to go about finding a person in New York City. Especially when he didn�t know her name. Or anything about her for that matter.
The more he thought about this, the crazier it sounded.
He was searching for a girl who he hadn�t even spoken a single word to. She�d probably tell him he was crazy. Or worse.
Laugh at him.
He wasn�t sure he could handle that.
After sitting there for a few moments, he decided he really had nothing better to do. Plus, if he didn�t at least try to find her, it was going to drive him crazy forever.
All of a sudden, the feeling came over him again. Very strongly.
At that point, he decided that logic would get him nowhere in this situation. It was time to follow his heart, as cheesy as that sounded. The feeling was getting stronger by the minute, and before he knew it, he was making his way out of the parking lot and trusting his instincts to lead him to the right place.
It had been at least an hour. Going on nothing but the random thoughts that entered his head, he�d made his way out of the city.
He clicked on the radio, in an attempt to relax.
So denied so I lied are you the now or never kind
In a day and a day love I'm gonna be gone for good again
Are you willing to be had are you cool with just tonight
Here's a toast to all those who hear me all too well
Here's to the nights we felt alive
Here's to the tears you knew you'd cry
Here's to goodbye
Tomorrow's gonna come too soon
It didn�t work. He clicked the radio off again.
His thoughts switched to the harsh reality he would have to return to at some point. �They�re going to kill me,� he said out loud.
But he didn�t really care. The feeling was still getting stronger.
He thought about everyone who would kill him, once he finally returned. �The guys are gonna kill me. JC is going to kill me more. Mike is going to kill me. That�s probably gonna hurt. Johnny is going to kill me with a long boring lecture about responsibility and safety and taking the necessary precautions. That�s gonna hurt even more.�
�Momma is going to kill me when she finds out.� At that he almost turned around and went back. There was nothing like Momma Lynn when she was angry.
He shrugged. �They�re all gonna kill me anyway. I may as well keep going.�
Finally, for no apparent reason, he stopped.
He pulled into the parking lot of a little park. And stopped.
He got out of the car, nearly locking the keys inside in his haste, and made his way through the wrought iron gate and up to the top of a hill. He was so confused that he didn�t know what to do next.
His feet led him.
His feet led him over several small hills until he came to the top of a hill overlooking a pond. The pond looked like glass, the setting sun shining off it beautifully. The air was warm; the grass was soft; everything was perfect.
And then he saw a small form sitting in the grass.
He took a few steps forward and then stopped in his tracks. It was HER.
Seeing her there nearly killed him. He almost had a heart attack and died right there.
Then, as if she felt his presence yards behind her, she stood slowly and turned. Her face was expressionless. She wore only sweats and a tank top. Her dark hair framed her face loosely. Her feet were bare.
She was beautiful.
She stepped towards him slowly. There were minutes of silence. Not a word was uttered.
She finally spoke first. �You felt it, too.�
He merely nodded, still unable to speak.
The energy pulled them closer to one another. Then, in a single moment, the abnormality of the situation vanished. Completely.
The instantly felt relaxed with each other.
They stepped closer and closer together until they were mere inches from touching.
Without thinking, without hesitation, he closed the distance and wrapped his arms around her. They simply stood there, holding one another, breathing in the other�s scent.
It was the greatest relief he had ever known. He had never felt so free in his life. It felt as if a great weight had been lifted from him. A weight that he hadn�t even known was there.
After standing there for awhile, neither knew exactly how long, she stepped back slightly, taking his hand in hers. She turned and led him to where she�d previously been sitting. He sat on the cool grass, pulling her down gently into his lap.
She snuggled up against him and tucked her head beneath his chin. Once she was comfortable, she whispered softly, �Sunsets are beautiful. And never the same. Kinda like people, if you think about it.� She paused. �I�ve come to this park since I was a little girl. I�ve probably seen a thousand sunsets on this very hill.�
A few moments passed. What she said next was spoken so softly, it nearly went unheard. �But it�s never looked quite as wonderful as it does tonight.�
He looked down into her eyes, shining with joy. A single tear made it�s way down her cheek. One of his met her own.
A soft sigh left his lips, for the hundredth time that day. But this was hardly a sigh of frustration.
He closed his eyes, soaking in the warmth from her body. �I�ve never felt so at peace with�everything, as I do at this very moment.�
He felt her head nod against him in agreement.
A single thought of dread crossed his mind. The thought that when tomorrow came, he might have to leave her forever. He couldn�t bear to have something this beautiful be destroyed like last time. But he didn�t know if he could let her go. Not now. Not ever.
He shook the thought from his head, wanting only to think of the now, wanting to forget about tomorrow. For the first time, he truly dreaded his career. At that moment, all he needed was the sunset and the woman in his arms.
Here's to the nights we felt alive
Here's to the tears you knew you'd cry
Here's to goodbye
Tomorrow's gonna come too soon
As the sun sank lower and finally disappeared behind a hill, his arms tightened around her. They lay there awake for hours, treasuring every hour, every minute, every second. They talked about everything. And nothing. All at once.
The stars shone brightly overhead, as they drifted off to sleep, warm in each other�s arms.
The next morning, Justin woke with the sun. He had never slept so well. He�d never felt so wonderful at this time of day.
Justin really wasn�t a morning person. By any means.
She brought out the best in him.
He looked down at the woman in his arms. She looked so peaceful. As peaceful as he felt. She was so beautiful. He would be content to just lay there forever.
At that moment, he remembered two very different things.
One, he still didn�t know her name. That was pretty humorous, considering he felt closer to her than anyone he had ever known.
Two, it was Friday.
Friday. As in the day they were scheduled to leave New York.
He swallowed hard. This was both the best and worst day of his life.
As if she could feel his tension, her eyes began to flutter open just then.
She looked up at him smiling brightly. But she could tell something was wrong. She brushed the feeling aside momentarily. �Good Morning,� she greeted cheerily.
He smiled back at her, pushing the thought of leaving her out of his mind. �Sleep well?
�Better than ever.� She paused. �Something on your mind?�
�Just realizing that I don�t even know your name.�
She giggled. He was right. �I don�t know your name either.�
He was a little bit surprised at that, but recovered quickly. �Justin Timberlake. At your service, madam.�
�Carrie Anderson. It�s a pleasure to meet you.�
�The pleasure is all mine. Never in my life have I had the honor of knowing such a lady.�
She rolled her eyes, but before she could comment, his lips covered hers gently.
He pulled back after a moment and grinned at the look on her face. �Still have something to say?�
She mumbled something softly before pulling him back to her, this time rendering him speechless instead.
She decided to take advantage of this situation and bring up what she�d been thinking, since she�d felt that something was wrong earlier that morning.
She looked into his eyes. �You have to leave, don�t you?�
To say he was shocked would have been an enormous understatement. But somehow he�d known that she�d sensed something was wrong. �How�how did you know?�
�The same way that you knew that I knew.�
Justin simply nodded.
He knew she deserved an explanation. But he couldn�t even rationalize leaving her side to himself.
He sighed. Tears filled his eyes. �I don�t want to leave...but I have to. We were only scheduled to be here for a week.� Then, he realized that she didn�t know who he was. He spoke up softly, �I�m not sure if you know who I am or not�� he paused. �I�m a singer. We�my friends and I�are in a group. We never stay in one place for...�
She interrupted him gently. �You don�t need to explain. Neither one of us planned this. My home is here. Yours isn�t. We both have commitments in different places��
�I have never felt more at home than I do with you.�
She nodded sadly.
He held her tightly, searching his mind desperately for a way they could be together. �There has to be a way. I won�t��
She placed her hand on his cheek, instantly stopping the flow of words. They sat there in silence for a few moments.
Then, she spoke up. �I heard something once. I didn�t quite believe it then, but now�� Her voice trailed off and she paused for a moment, holding back tears. �I heard once, that every person is only half of a whole person. In ancient times, the gods became angry with the people. They split all the whole people down the middle and scattered them across the earth, so that each of these new people would spend their whole life searching for their other half.�
He looked down at her, into her eyes, and they both started to cry. �I�m whole again, Carrie.�
She nodded, unable to speak through her tears.
Put your name on the line along with place and time
Wanna stay not to go I wanna ditch the logical
Here's a toast to all those who hear me all too well
As her tears subsided, she whispered to him gently. �Let�s just savor the time we have left. No more crying.�
He wiped a few remaining tears from her face. �I don�t ever want to be without you.�
�Just hold me, Justin. Don�t let go.�
All my time is froze in motion
Can't I stay an hour or two or more
Don't let me let you go
Here's a toast to all those who hear me all too well
They sat there in silence for awhile longer, wishing that the time for him to leave would never come.
She knew what she had to do.
She could barely force the words from her throat. �You should go.�
He held her tighter, mumbling a single word into her hair. �No.�
�Justin, I�m not going to have you getting in trouble because of me. You have commitments. You should go.�
He knew he should listen. He knew he should go back to the hotel. They were probably frantic with worry. But for once, he didn�t care.
After a few more moments of convincing, he reluctantly agreed. �I know I have to go. I just can�t stand the thought of leaving you.�
She nodded, willing herself not to cry. �This can�t be the end.�
�Just remember, no matter where I am, you�ll always be in my heart. This isn�t the end, Carrie. This could never be the end.�
They rose to their feet, still clinging to one another, wanting to commit this moment to memory forever. Not that they could ever forget it.
She looked deep into his eyes, and for that brief moment, their souls seemed to touch.
He bent his head and kissed her softly, one last time, before releasing her and taking a step back, tears filling his eyes.
A seemingly endless trail of tears streamed down her face. �This isn�t good-bye. Don�t say good-bye.�
He took another step back. �I wouldn�t dream of it.�
�You�re in my heart. I�ll never forget you.�
�I love you, Carrie.�
And with that, he retreated towards his car, first walking backwards and finally turning, with one final glance over his shoulder. She didn�t have time to tell him she loved him. She didn�t have to though. He knew.
She watched his form retreat until he disappeared from sight. She stood staring up at the sky, as she thrust her hands into her pockets.
Feeling something in her pocket, she pulled it out, wondering what it could possibly be. On the back of a gasoline receipt was a little note. A note that would become etched into her memory over time. It was simple, but exactly what she needed.
If you ever need me, just call. 333-624-5292. You will always be in my heart. Never forget that.
Justin
Carrie smiled softly through her tears. �He must have put it in my pocket while I was still asleep.� Just knowing that she had a way to reach him comforted her. Just knowing he was out there made her feel complete.
Back in his car, Justin attempted to pull himself together. He pulled out of the parking lot, feeling surprisingly happy, considering he had just left his other half back on that hill. He had confidence in fate. Someday, they would be together again.
One started down the hill towards home, and one headed back to mass hysteria. Both heaved a sigh, feeling the immediate sadness of the situation, but ultimately complete and utter peace. Peace like they had never known.
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