It's been a few quite uneventful days. I worked yesterday from 7am till 4pm, came home and realized that my brother wasn't home. I never have my key with me when I go to work, and I thought he knew that, so I was extremely angry. It was hot, I was sweating like a pig, I was tired because I'd just worked 9 hours and had gotten up at 5.15am on a Saturday, and then that guy wasn't home. I had to get on my bike and go to my grandma that lives near us house to ask for a key. She wasn't home. That meant, I had to cycle to my other grandparents that lived like 15 minutes away to get that freaking key. I was not only feeling terrible when I finally came home then, I was so mad at my brother, I lack words for that. He was lucky that he wasn't home when I arrived. He'd left me a note telling me he'd sleep over at a friend's house. I liked the idea of having the night for my own.
Not much later, he called and asked if I'd mind having a bbq over at our house that night, with some friends. I didn't, so an hour later, he and six of his friends came. They didn't really bother me, I actually get along with them pretty well, especially with Leo. He's a really nice guy, he came to 'visit' me in my room because my brother had said I as there. I found that somewhat nice. He watched me writing icq messages, and we talked for a while. Actually until my brother told him that his meat was almost burning and that it should be taken off. Leo is cool, he's got an extremely good attitude towards things and I totally agree with a lot of things he says.
All night I couldn't focus my thoughts on something meaningful, so I just surfed the net randomly. I could have written something, but hearing the guys and the loud music didn't let me concentrate on anything. At midnight, one of our neighbors called and complained about the loud music. Luckily it was me who answered the phone, everyone else was a bit too drunk to sound serious. There were a few more calls but whenever I picked up the phone, no one answered. Since they were awake and had the nerve to make telephone terror, the music can't have been that disturbing for them. It was quite loud and I'd wondered a few times if I should tell them to turn it down, but well, it happens one in a year, probably even less, that we have a real party here with music like that. I suppose the actual problem was that it was mainly rock and rap, which seems to upset people often even when it's played not very loud.
I went to bed at almost 2am, and didn't get up before noon. When I heard the door close, I decided to get up. One of the guys, Chris, was still there, but I didn't mind that. My brother had already cleaned up most things, which I found pretty cool. I'd thought I'd be the one to do all the cleaning. And I wouldn't have minded, honestly.
I've not been feeling to well about myself the past few days. Well, actually for almost two weeks. It started to really get to me, and it made me worried. It still does a bit, but it's not that much anymore. I remembered how happy I was during my time in California, and still the first couple of days when I was here. I had adapted quite a lot to the people around me in California, so I came back with a different attitude towards many things, essential ones. I thought I'd be able to just keep that general attitude I'd gotten, but I realized that it wasn't possible and I fell way back into what life had been a while before I went to California. I remembered all the great times and the way I felt when I thought of what my host brother often said, 'See that's my German exchange student'. I remember exactly the way he said it. He said it when we were playing football and I caught the ball or something, occasions like that. I suppose he'll never know how much that's meant to me, and what it brings back to me now. I'll always remember that, there aren't many things people have said that mean that much to me. That reminds me how big it made me smile when I was the only one who got applause at the farewell party, when I went to pick up my report card.:)
