Top Ten Lists
FYI: On Xena TT lists, 6 is usually omitted dating back to Monty Python tradition.
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By Rebekah
Top Ten Signs You have a Xena Complex:
10) When you toss your head you hear whooshing sounds

9) You wear a metal bra(even if you're a guy)

8) You consider polishing swords and fishing perfect leisure activities

7) You spend all of your time searching for a best friend who's blond, persuasive, an Amazon Queen...

6) You wish there was a six

5)No one will play frisbee with you because instead of throwing it back you try to ricochet it off a few things first...

4) You painted a sawhorse gold and named it Argo

3) Your favorite material is leather

2) When you're asleep instead of snoring you do the Xena battle cry(zzzzzzz-ayiyiyi-zzzz-ayiyiyiyiyiyi)

and the top sign is...
1) You sneak around poking people in the neck and saying "I've just cut off the flow of blood to your brain..."
Top Ten Things Xena does to annoy Gabrielle:
10) Pretending to be Meg and singing loud, obnoxious bar songs

9) Ignoring Gab and talking exclusively to Argo

8) Putting live eels in her bed

7) doing that funky spirit dance around the campfire

6) I'm sorry, Xena stole number six

5) Getting up in the middle of the night and sharpening her sword by Gabby's ear

4) Secretly spiking Gabrielle's drinks with linseed root(princess drool returns)

3) running and hiding whenever she sees a rabbit and asking Gab to tell her when the "vicious critter" is gone

2) singing the Joxer the Mighty song in a high-pitched voice

and the number one thing...
1) telling blond jokes(hey Gab, how many blondes does it take to kill a bacchae...)
Top Ten things a hard-core Xenite would do if they met Lucy or Renee:
10) Set the world record for saying OH MY GOD!! the most times in a row

9) Start shaking so hard they become a blur

8) Scream so loud that all the glass within two miles shatters

7) Hover off the ground

6) actually think there would be a six

5) Start bowing, chanting, and kissing the exalted gals feet(we're not worthy...)

4) Transform into a pile of jello

3) Collapse into her arms(are you really unconscious?...hmm)

2) Have a nervous breakdown and end up paying therapy bills all their life

and the number one thing is...
1) Pinch themselves black and blue because "I am so dreaming this..."
Top Ten Signs That Xena's Been in Your House:
10) There's a flying parchment caught in your tree.

9) There's a flock of guys at your house looking for the "hot chick in the leather"

8) "Ceaser sucks!" is spray-painted on your walls

7) Your Callisto action figure is looking a little under the weather

6) Oh no!  still no six

5) Your most annoying sibling is in the hospital with a "chakram wound to the head"

4) There's a campfire in the middle of your kitchen floor.

3) The walls have mysterious boot prints going up them

2) Your fridge is empty except for a note that says "Sorry, Gab eats like a pig."

And the number one sign that Xena has been in your house...
1) When you left, the door was locked, when you came back the door was sawdust
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