Disclaimer: "The Legend of Arislan" belongs to someone
else, but I couldn't tell you who if my life depended
on it - I've never actually seen it, only heard about
it.  And the others - Milo, Crazy Old Gretchen, Bob,
and "I" - are mine, so don't steal them! 
_______________________________________________________

     Part Four: The Legend of Bob the Duck Head
                   by Ami-chan


Blinking didn't seem to help, either.  All it did was
further confirm that there WAS a sword pressed to my
neck. 

"Please, don't kill me!"  I whimpered pathetically,
not knowing what else to do.  After all I'd been
through - to hell and back, even - I didn't want to
die NOW!

"Daryoon, it's just a little girl.  Stop that."

I wanted to protest; I wasn't JUST a "little girl"!  I
wasn't even that little!  But, having your life
threatened kind of changes your normal reactions, and
I reminded wide-eyed and silent.

"But she just . . .appeared!  She could be some sort
of witch or sorceress!"

"But I'm NOT!" I yelped in shock, desperate, as the
blade drew closer.

"Then what are you doing here?"

"I don't know!  I'm just a normal, everyday kid!  This
shouldn't be happening to me!"  I knew I was babbling,
but at this point, I didn't care.  As long as it
prolonged by life, or got him to spare me, I would
gladly make of fool of myself.  "I was just following
Crazy Old Gretchen!  I shouldn't have, but I did!
Then, there was Milo, and Bob the duck head-"

"The Bob the duck head?"

I blinked in confusion as the blade was pulled away
from my frail little neck with its panic-pounding
blood veins.  "Yeah, Bob the duck head," I repeated
dumbly.  "Is there another?"

"How do you know about Crazy Old Gretchen and Bob the
duck head?" he demanded as I slinked carefully away in
case he decided to rid me of my head as poor Bob had
been.

"Crazy Old Gretchen lived in my town."

"And what town did you live in?" the other, nicer, guy
asked me.

"Anywhere But Marietta."

"Okay.  But, I wanted to know the name of the town."

I blinked, nodding slowly.  "That's it; Anywhere But
Marietta."

"We figure that out, already!" Daryoon growled, the
sword's blade going back to my throat.  "The town's
name!"

I broke into tears, sobbing brokenly.  It had NOT been
a good day!  Luckily, my reaction shocked him into
withdrawing the blade again, and after a few deep
breaths I was once again sort of in control of myself.
"The name of the town IS Anywhere But Marietta," I
repeated, sniffling.  "I don't know why, it just IS!"

"I've never heard of it before.  Have you, Narsus?"
For the first time, the sword-yielding guy sounded
quite likable.  Then again, I wasn't thinking of him
as being likable or not when he had the sword to my
throat.

"Never."

He turned his attention back to me, and I shrank back
in fear.  "Do you know the legend of Bob the duck
head?"

I sighed.  He wasn't going to kill me after all.
"There's a legend about a moldy old duck head?"  I
shrieked sharply as the sword returned to my throat.
What had I said THIS time?!

"You will not insult Bob like that!"

"Calm down, Daryoon.  She obviously doesn't know any
better."

"Yes, yes!  You're right!  I don't!"  Once again, my
life was spared, and I sighed, trembling violently at
my . . .um . . .third? . . .brush with death.  "Can
you explain?  What did I say wrong?"  I had no desire
to be put in danger again.  I wasn't really
interesting in knowing, but if it saves my life, why
not?

"You really don't know the legend of Bob the duck
head?"

I shook my head.  "Should I?"

"Everyone knows the legend of Bob the duck head!"

I crossed my arms, shifting to a more comfortable
position - I'd appeared on my knees on a rather hard
table - and pouted.  "Well, I haven't!"

"Would you like to?"

Hmmm . . .risk death, or hear a niffty story?
"Uh-huh!"  I wasn't that stupid!

"Well, it all started . . ."

**********

The land was happy and rich!  All was right with the
world, and it was all thanks to one creature: Bob the
magical duck.

You see, Bob the magical duck's life force kept the
land rich, and there was always enough rain and food
to go around.  The people took care of and cherished
Bob the magical duck, and-

**********

"Bob the magical duck?  I thought we were talking
about Bob the duck head!"

"We are!  Shut up so I can finish!"

**********

-because of that, Bob the magical duck continued to
use his mystical power to aid the people

But then, one horrible day, a wicked dark shadow (no,
not the Dynesty, something much worse) covered the
land, and the people knew fear.  You see-

**********

"Was it a Hoho?  Like in those commercials?  It always
seems to be a giant Hoho, and then it turns out to
be-"

"Do you want to die, or something?"

**********

-it was (dramatic music) Crazy Old Gretchen!  The Evil
One herself had appeared!  She had heard about the
wealth and happiness of the land and-

**********

"Hey, what's so funny?"

"'The Evil One herself'?"  I giggled hysterically,
imagining a supper-deformed Crazy Old Gretchen
swinging her cane and smacking people over the head.
It certainly wasn't a very terrifying image.

**********

-wanted to see the cause of it.  No one was allowed to
be that happy!

Crazy Old Gretchen strolled through town-

**********

"Wait!  'Strolled'?  Don't you mean 'hovered'?"

"Huh?"

"She CAN'T walk!  She hovers in her little old rocking
chair!"

"Hmm . . .well, she wasn't in a rocking chair this
time.  Maybe that happened later."

"Whatever."

**********

-and at first no one noticed.  She began to comment
about the beauty of the land, and eventually
discovered the secret: Bob the magical duck.

What power this creature had to make everything so
pure and lovely!  She decided she wanted that power
for herself!  And, at first, she was uncertain what
she should do to gain this power.  Then, it came to
her!  Why not destroy the duck head and absorb it's
power?

Poor, unsuspecting Bob the magical duck had no idea
what was coming.  He was happy and the people were
content; that's all he needed to know.  Why would
anyone ever wish to hurt him?  He was Bob the magical
duck, after all!

And then, the evil ax-wielding Crazy Old Gretchen
raised her bloody ax and ended the life of Bob the
magical duck.  She then took the decapitated duck head
and set it atop her cane, declaring it to be Bob the
duck head, to further insult us and his greatness.

**********

"Ewww!!  That's sick!"  I wrinkled my nose at the
thought of all that blood dripping down the cane and
on to the ground . . .yuk.

"Yes, her destruction of such a sacred creature is
sick."

Well, that wasn't exactly what I had meant, but not
wanting to lose my head like Bob the magical duck, I
kept silent.  I started to wonder what was going to
happen next.  Nothing seemed to make sense anymore.  I
knew about the legend of Bob the duck head, but where
did that put me?  And how the hell had I gotten here
in the first place?!  What was going on here?!

I was about to ask one of the guys where I was, at
least, but I found them staring at me in horror.
What?  Hadn't I brushed my hair that morning?  Was
there something caught in my teeth?

Glancing down, I saw that I was fading out.  I was
demateralizing!  I screamed, "Not again!" and wondered
where I was going to end up next.  And all the while
hell was beginning to look better and better . . .
_______________________________________________________

Do you wish to question my sanity?  Or, prehaps, share
in the delight of the story and all the loveable
characters? Then, e-mail me at
[email protected]
I'll try to respond as quickly as I am able!  ^-^
Hosted by www.Geocities.ws

1