The silver spikes on his cuff cut into my arms in an almost caressing way as he pulled me toward the couch. The pain was quickly dismissed � there were more important things to think about at the moment. I couldn�t stop looking at his eyes, which were framed nicely by bangs falling into his face. He looked young. I told myself that he was older than me, older than me by so much. He knew that I wanted something from him. When my arms had reached out to him so wantonly, he felt my need and with a sleek, sly smile that seemed to say �I know, don�t worry, I know and everything will be ok,� he leaned foreword and gently kissed my neck as he pulled me to the couch where he lay me down. He leaned into my shoulder and the spiked collar that matched the cuffs on his arms bit into the tender flesh of my neck.
I gasped.
This is the way the world ends. This is the way it started.
I watched him without being able to move. Part of me didn�t like that, part of me found it exciting. The fact that I couldn�t move at all should have been more important to me, but I didn�t know. And then all that was important was the feel of him inside of me, hurting me, and the streaks of blood where spikes had dug too deep.
Do you think he possesses some sort of magic over me? If that�s what you�re thinking then your wrong. It�s nothing as romanticized as that. Picture him with brown-blond bangs, dressed in black and spikes. Perfect. Perfect. Perfect. Picture me with red-streaked, black hair dressed in a black dress and knee high boots, kohl lined eyes, mascara running in streaks down my cheeks. Now picture him with ropes and me � alone�
I wouldn�t scream. I couldn�t scream. My body shivered in pleasure and in pain, riding a fine line that was suddenly overlapping. If I could scream it wouldn�t be because of the pleasure, it would be because of the rape.
Please, you have to believe me. I went willingly into his arms for comfort� I couldn�t stop what happened next.
I wouldn�t scream for him, I wouldn�t scream. I would cry, if I wasn�t already all cried out. Is this why people kill themselves? As if it wasn�t bad enough before this.
This is the way the world ends�
I was so empty maybe he was just trying to fill me up, maybe he thought I was as hollow on the inside as I was on the outside. The pain brought a wonderfully colored picture floating to the front of my mind. It was so pretty. All full of kohl black shadows and scarlet splashes. It was a piece art so lovely it had to be real.
Streaks of blood covered my arms, which could only move an inch in either direction. I pulled against the ties and he moved his hands up my body to cover my own and keep me from struggling. I pulled my wrists up against his sharpened silver spikes.
Silver was inside my body, it let out what had been keeping me from being completely hollow. He looked surprised, and I smiled. I wondered how he�d be able to hide a body, he hadn�t thought of that. He didn�t pull away, I don�t know if it ever occurred to him. I pulled his wrists closer to my own until the silver bit into bone. He sat up shocked, a look of disgust on his face. Always nice to know you can still disgust the monsters. Slowly rivers of blood flowed from my body and he was still above me, too shocked to do anything but stare in horror. Slowly I became something that was also hollow on the inside.
This is the way the world ends. This is the way it started. So deep inside my body, there are rivers and mountains and temples made to worship a goddess so big she�s unfathomable. The goddess is thin and made of shadows. Legend tells that she sacrificed herself, to keep the world from flooding.