farscapechat

Farscape Chat

01. 01. 2002

Note:

silver=
Aeryn Sun
Stark

Doyle=
John Crichton
Crais

qc=
Scorpy
Scorpy�s Ass

Bracken=
John�s Ass

this is what happens when I come into chat to find John Crichton waiting for me ;)

<.silver> John!!
<.silver> *jumps john*
<.silver> *lavishes him with kisses*
<.John Crichton> i missed you too
<.silver> honey, sweetie, baby. where've you been all my life?
<.John Crichton> say, you didn't happen to do a bunch of drugs didya?
<.silver> lol
<.John Crichton> i've been around, going crazy from a chip in my head
<.silver> awww....poor baby. would you like me to make it better?
<.silver> *rips john's clothes off*
<.silver> *rips own clothes off*
<.silver> *gets down*
<.John Crichton> uh...i think i hear Scorpy callnig my name. i should go
<.silver> lol
<.silver> but...but....i love you!!!!
[Tue Jan 01 01:05:02 EST 2002] Doyle: John:"It's kinda hard not to flinch Scorpy with Frau Blucher tickling my prostate."
<.Doyle> yo yo yo
<.silver> hee
<.silver> heya
<.silver> *sniff* my Johnny left me
<.Doyle> JOHN WAS HERE?!?
<.silver> yup
<.silver> and then i told qc over AIM, and she started to come to chat, but now she refuses to come in until he returns.
<.Doyle> *sniff*
<.Doyle> did he leave me a note? a msg? a time to meet him tonight?
<.silver> heh
<.silver> negative
<.Doyle> bastard!
<.Doyle> that's it, i'm leaving cause i'm pissed off
<.silver> lol
[Tue Jan 01 01:07:00 EST 2002] John Crichton: "It's kinda hard not to flinch Scorpy with Frau Blucher tickling my prostate."
<.silver> John!!!!!!
<.silver> *squeals from happiness*
<.John Crichton> silver!!!
<.John Crichton> i forgot one thing, give Doyle this note when he returns
<.silver> lol
<.silver> *looks all seductive and stuff* what do i get in return?
[Tue Jan 01 01:07:58 EST 2002] Scorpy: John! Get in the kitchen and make me some pie! I mean, insert the rod.
<.Scorpy> whee
<.John Crichton> it tells him a time to meet me at my place tonight
<.John Crichton> heya Scorpy
<.Scorpy> heya, John
<.John Crichton> now is this *you* you or your neural clone?
<.silver> lol
<.Scorpy> um... I'm whoever you want me to be, baby *leers*
<.silver> hehee
<.Scorpy> *grabs miniScorp* he can be the neural clone

uh....i appear to be missing part of this chat. needless to say, qc came in as Scorpy, and then I re-entered as Aeryn Sun:

<.Aeryn Sun> yo
<.Scorpy> ahoyhoy
<.Scorpy> that's fine with me, John - the less you're wearing, the better
<.Aeryn Sun> mmm, i agree. oh wait, i mean no. *walks away and pretends not to love john*
<.Scorpy> lmao
<.Scorpy> well, I'm not sharing with you, anyhow
<.Aeryn Sun> *looks at scorpious* hmmmm.....john doesn't seem to be with us, anymore.
<.Scorpy> hmm
<.John Crichton> i'm here
<.Scorpy> well, we could make the most of a bad situation
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Scorpy> how 'bout it, baby?
<.Aeryn Sun> lmao
<.Scorpy> oh, okay then
<.Scorpy> *grabs John*
<.Aeryn Sun> oh thank god john returned!
<.Aeryn Sun> save me, save me!
<.Scorpy> *is offended*
<.Aeryn Sun> brb
<.Scorpy> You don't love me? *sniff*
<.Scorpy> Not that I don't love you
<.Scorpy> Yeah, yeah, go and brb on me instead of facing up to me
<.Scorpy> pfft
<.Scorpy> *goes and plays on the drums for awhile*
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.John Crichton> i offered silver my peacekeeper duster thingy but she left
<.Aeryn Sun> oh, more's the pity
<.Aeryn Sun> *goes and works out in little peace keeper training room thingy*
<.Aeryn Sun> *doesn't have emotions and stuff*
<.Scorpy> hee
<.Aeryn Sun> *has some of pilot's dna*
<.Scorpy> lmao
<.Aeryn Sun> *beats up john a bit*
<.Scorpy> you gonna go spew up some blood on your punching bag?
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Aeryn Sun> hell yeah
<.Scorpy> *beats up john a bit too*
<.Aeryn Sun> *g*
<.Aeryn Sun> *flies around in her prowler*
<.Scorpy> *gets into John's module*
<.Aeryn Sun> *gets attracted to some other peace keeper guy*
<.John Crichton> oh this getting beaten up by my dead luv of my life and my enemy is *great*
<.Aeryn Sun> lmao
<.Scorpy> lol
<.Scorpy> hee
<.Scorpy> *does all sorts of cool maneouvers around ice planet*
<.Aeryn Sun> *is the superior pilot*
<.Scorpy> Darling. Uncontested.
<.Aeryn Sun> lmfao!
<.Scorpy> hee
<.Scorpy> I had that line memorised before I even saw the ep
<.Scorpy> I mean, qc did
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Aeryn Sun> lmao
<.Aeryn Sun> riiiiiiight
<.Scorpy> shutuppppppppp!
<.Aeryn Sun> ha ha...i'm laughing like an idiot
<.Scorpy> That's because you are.
<.Aeryn Sun> heh
<.Scorpy> You're just PK scum.
<.Aeryn Sun> was waiting for that
<.Scorpy> yeah, yeah
<.Aeryn Sun> no, i'm a peacekeeper skank
<.Scorpy> hee
<.John Crichton> *becomes John/Scpry*
<.Scorpy> that too
<.John Crichton> Scorpy*
<.Aeryn Sun> man, we are all so twisted....lol
<.John Crichton> shut-up and diiiiiie
<.Scorpy> lmao
<.Aeryn Sun> heh
<.Scorpy> damn, John, you don't look so good
<.John Crichton> well that's cause i look like *you*
<.Aeryn Sun> are you kidding? he's fucking hot! i mean.....damnit! no, i don't want you! *walks away again*
<.John Crichton> no wait! *changes back to just John*
<.Scorpy> lol
<.Scorpy> That's better, darling
<.Aeryn Sun> yeah, is it really you, john?
<.Scorpy> Insert the rod this time, why don'tcha?
<.Scorpy> hee
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
[Tue Jan 01 01:18:32 EST 2002] John's ass: *thwak*
<.Scorpy> You are so... my girl. *licks John's face*
<.Aeryn Sun> lmao
<.Scorpy> lmao
<.Aeryn Sun> whoooooo!
<.John Crichton> i'm sick of this changing your mind crap, Aeryn either you want me or not
<.Scorpy> ooh, John
<.Aeryn Sun> *jumps all over john's ass*
<.John�s ass> eeeeeeeeeeeeee
<.Scorpy> My arse! Mine!
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.John Crichton> oh no, i'm talking to my own arse
<.Scorpy> lmao
<.Aeryn Sun> lmfao....john's ass goes "eeeeeee!"
<.John Crichton> *kicks own arse*
<.Scorpy> *is prepared to battle Aeryn to the death for it*
<.Scorpy> hee
<.John�s ass> oh. I do a lot more than that
<.John�s ass> just you wait
<.Scorpy> lol
<.Aeryn Sun> whatever, you grotesque bastard. i'll wipe up the floor with ya!
<.Aeryn Sun> and lol
<.Scorpy> with his arse?
<.Aeryn Sun> heh. you, dumbass. lol
<.John Crichton> you're calling my arse grotesque??
<.Scorpy> I'vmy arse is not pansy!
<.John�s ass> she can wipe me any day.... mmmmmmmm
<.Aeryn Sun> oh hell no
<.Scorpy> wha?
<.Scorpy> *my
<.Aeryn Sun> ooh
<.Scorpy> lol\
<.Aeryn Sun> that was pretty gross
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.John Crichton> wipe you with toilet paper
<.John�s ass> lol
<.John�s ass> no
<.John�s ass> with love
<.Aeryn Sun> lmao
<.Aeryn Sun> i can wipe you with love?
<.John�s ass> yes
<.Aeryn Sun> is that some kind of new cleaning cloth, or something?
<.John Crichton> my grl and my arse are NOT gonna be in love
<.Scorpy> Oh, dear lord... John's not having conversations with the clone in his head, he's having conversations with his ARSE.
<.John Crichton> not while i'm still here
<.Aeryn Sun> lmfao
<.John�s ass> Not a new cleaning cloth
<.John�s ass> just love
<.Aeryn Sun> well, *purrs seductively* what're you gonna do about it johnny? ;)
<.Scorpy> *has conversation with own arse* So, how ya goin'?
<.John�s ass> pure and sipmple
<.John Crichton> shut-up Scorpy
<.Aeryn Sun> lmao
<.John�s ass> *wriggles*
<.Scorpy> lmao
<.Aeryn Sun> *is entranced*
<.John Crichton> *kicks arse into space*
<.John�s ass> lol
<.Aeryn Sun> nooooooooooo!
<.John�s ass> I mean Owwwwwwwwwww
<.Aeryn Sun> John, you and your ass are one and the same ! you can't live without it!
<.Scorpy> <.Scorpy�s arse> Why, I'm my usual leather-clad self, thank you so very much for asking*
<.Aeryn Sun> it can't live without you!
<.Aeryn Sun> and lmao
<.Aeryn Sun> you NEED it, john. it's part of you!
<.Scorpy> John, your arse can't go into space without you going with it!
<.Scorpy> Not that you haven't demonstrated your ability to survive in space
<.Scorpy> But if I'm going to get that wormhole tech, I need your arse
<.John�s ass> *clenches*
<.Scorpy> the arse is the Key
<.John Crichton> i thought this arse was like a clone of my arse and it was just an arse. i figured my arse was still attached to me
<.Scorpy> lol
<.John Crichton> frell
<.Aeryn Sun> yeah, what's up with that shit?
<.Aeryn Sun> him surviving in space and all?
<.Scorpy> *shrug*
<.Scorpy> I mean, it happens in scifi all the time
<.Scorpy> but it's still lame
<.John�s ass> That's right, sweet thing. I am KEY!!
<.Aeryn Sun> yeah but....not to humans. and they don't survive. it's.....crap
<.Aeryn Sun> it's not possible.
<.Aeryn Sun> and lol
<.John Crichton> you're never getting the wormhole tech, Scorpy *follows arse into space*
<.Scorpy> You bet you are *smiles seductively*
<.Aeryn Sun> you're the key? what? glory's after you?
<.Scorpy> no, I'm after the arse
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Aeryn Sun> are you glory?
<.Aeryn Sun> who asked you?
<.John�s ass> *sticks out*
<.Aeryn Sun> lmao
<.Scorpy> I'm not Glory
<.Scorpy> I'm Scorpy, damnit
<.Scorpy> and I want John's arse
<.Aeryn Sun> don't we all?
<.Scorpy> *sighs dreamily*
<.Scorpy> especially Doyley
<.Aeryn Sun> *sighs with*
<.Aeryn Sun> oh yeah
<.Scorpy> pity he's not here to see this
<.Aeryn Sun> he loves john and his ass
<.John Crichton> *aims arse at Scorpy and lights a match*
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Scorpy> Mmm, that's some good arse
<.Aeryn Sun> ha ha ha
<.Aeryn Sun> it's always bad when i start laughing hysterically, alone in the office
<.Aeryn Sun> *sigh*
<.Scorpy> *sticks neural knife in john's arse in his mind*
<.Aeryn Sun> ew
<.Aeryn Sun> ew
<.John Crichton> frell
<.Aeryn Sun> *NOT* a good mental picture
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.John Crichton> frelling neural knives!
<.John Crichton> how many of those thnigs you got?
<.John Crichton> things*
<.Scorpy> I bought the Demtel collection
<.Aeryn Sun> heh
<.Scorpy> there's millions of the buggers
<.Aeryn Sun> he got a great deal, too
<.Scorpy> hee
<.Scorpy> but wait, there's more!
<.Aeryn Sun> it slices, it dices
<.Scorpy> buy this set of neural knives, and receive one free giant ball torture rack!
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Scorpy> it paralyses really cute arse
<.John Crichton> ooh, torture me, Scorpy
<.Scorpy> I thought you'd never ask!
<.John�s ass> pffffffffft
<.Aeryn Sun> these knives are of the highest quality. they can cut right through a tin can, and *still* be sharp enough to effortlessly cut through this tomato.
<.Scorpy> *straps John to giant ball... eww*
<.Scorpy> hee
<.Scorpy> cat swore that they'd cut through anything
<.Aeryn Sun> heh
<.Aeryn Sun> i love that ep
<.John�s ass> you can bounce a quarter off me, baby
<.Aeryn Sun> *sigh*
<.Scorpy> *licks John's face*
<.Aeryn Sun> and lmao.
<.Scorpy> don't we all?
<.Scorpy> lmao
<.Scorpy> *turns John over so that he can see the arse/baste the other side*
<.Aeryn Sun> *bounces quarters off of John's ass, just for the fun of it*
<.Scorpy> hee
<.Aeryn Sun> heh
<.John�s ass> this leather...is really binding. anyone care to help me remove it?
<.Scorpy> *will be absolutely useless if ever meets BB face-to-face*
<.Aeryn Sun> oh yeah!
<.Scorpy> *volunteers*
<.Aeryn Sun> *raises hand*
<.Scorpy> I guess you can help out *grumble*
<.John Crichton> See Flavious Scorpious here wants to visit foreign lands, meet foreign people and conquer them
<.Aeryn Sun> *tears off John's clothes, for the second time tonight*
<.John�s ass> *rushes over to eager people*
<.Scorpy> lol
<.John�s ass> so tiiiiiight
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Scorpy> oh, dear lotd
<.Scorpy> lord
<.Scorpy> lordy lordy lord
<.Scorpy> I have seen the light
<.John�s ass> heh
<.Aeryn Sun> yes, i too worship the ass
<.Aeryn Sun> *bows*
<.Scorpy> and it shines from John's arse
<.Aeryn Sun> lol....again with the ew.
<.Scorpy> *prostrates self*
<.John�s ass> lmao
<.John Crichton> alot of thnigs shine outta my arse
<.Scorpy> ew
<.John�s ass> lmao
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Scorpy> do you talk a la Ace Ventura?
<.John Crichton> was that good for you?
<.John�s ass> I do that on my own.... I don't need "john" to speak for me.
<.Scorpy> hee
<.Aeryn Sun> heh....scorpy, speaking of meeting BB face to face.....i had this fantasy a few weeks ago that i was visiting you in australia and i met BB, and he was like, utterly taken with me. And during the course of our conversation (bugger knows where you were...), he revealed that he'd been divorced for awhile, and he offered to take me back to the set. and I was all...."oh, well I should really wait for my friend." but then i went with him anyway.
<.Scorpy> *gets out whip* this is for calling me Sparky....
<.Scorpy> lol
<.Aeryn Sun> and then i got to meet everyone, and then bb and i had dinner, and we fell in love, and i introduced you to him the next day, and you were all jealous
<.Aeryn Sun> t'was great
<.Aeryn Sun> *sniff*
<.Scorpy> heh
<.John�s ass> Aeryn! You little homewrecker...only not really. but still
<.Scorpy> yeah, I bet you enjoyed it
<.Scorpy> lol
<.John Crichton> brb
<.Scorpy> aw, crap
<.Aeryn Sun> *sniff*
<.Aeryn Sun> John left us
<.Scorpy> oh well, at least his arse is still here
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Aeryn Sun> true
<.Aeryn Sun> that's all that really matters
<.John�s ass> maybe that's what he's coming back as....
<.Scorpy> lol
<.Aeryn Sun> it's the most important part ;)
<.Scorpy> hee
<.John�s ass> *bends over*
<.Scorpy> lmao
<.Aeryn Sun> lmfao
<.Scorpy> how can an arse do that on its own?
<.Aeryn Sun> i was just gonna ask that
<.Scorpy> that one helluvan arse
<.John�s ass> I'm just that good
<.Aeryn Sun> 'cause that's a really weird mental picture
<.Aeryn Sun> i'm picturing an ass just like....folding in on itself
<.Aeryn Sun> which doesn't look very nice
<.Scorpy> and a talking arse isn't?
<.Scorpy> lmao
<.Aeryn Sun> heh
<.Aeryn Sun> true
<.Scorpy> there's like, a black hole inside it
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Scorpy> which he can manipulate
<.Aeryn Sun> oh god....ick
<.Scorpy> so that the arse can slightly implod or explode
<.Scorpy> with an eeeeeee
<.Aeryn Sun> if i wanted to get really gross, i could say that i'd like to manipulate his black hold.
<.Aeryn Sun> hole
<.Aeryn Sun> fucking hell
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Scorpy> thus being able to fold in on itself
<.Scorpy> lmao
<.Scorpy> yes, that is gross
<.Aeryn Sun> and heh......nice logical explanation
<.Scorpy> yeah
<.Aeryn Sun> more logical than john fucking flying through space without a fuckig flight suit and surviving!!!
<.Scorpy> lol
<.Scorpy> lol
<.Scorpy> well, Hitch-hiker's involved being able to survive in space
<.John�s ass> please. ladies. there is no need to disect me.
<.Aeryn Sun> hitch what? i've never seen or heard of that.
[Tue Jan 01 01:36:07 EST 2002] Crais: "Freeze! You're under arrest. You have the right to the remains of a silent attorney! If you cannot afford one...tough noogies! You can make one phone call. I recommend 'Trinity'. 976, triple five 'Love�
<.Scorpy> I ain't no lady!
<.Scorpy> hee
<.Scorpy> Crais!
<.Aeryn Sun> lol@dissect me
<.Scorpy> I was tinking of bringing Crais in here
<.Aeryn Sun> Captain Crais!
<.Scorpy> tinking? hmm
<.Aeryn Sun> heh
<.John�s ass> Craaaaaaais...I don't know who you are. But Craaaaaaaaaais
<.Aeryn Sun> i tink, you tink, we all tink tink
<.Scorpy> Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy, man
<.Aeryn Sun> aha
<.Scorpy> *screams for icecream*
<.Crais> you don't know who i am?
<.Scorpy> Baskin Robbins, Ben & Jerry's
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Crais> Crichton! i'm insulted
<.Aeryn Sun> what's your favourite? cream sicle or fudgesicle?
<.John�s ass> I'm icecream
<.Scorpy> John knows who you are, but his arse doesn't
<.Scorpy> we're candy!
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Aeryn Sun> we're electromagnetic candy!!!
<.Aeryn Sun> bwa ha ha ha!
<.Scorpy> *rides out in front of budong vomit*
<.Crais> oh, John's arse should remember me.........
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Scorpy> LMAO!
<.Scorpy> oh, dear lord
<.Scorpy> and damn, wasn't simCrais HOT?
<.Scorpy> *swoon*
<.John�s ass> uhh....right. but I've had much to drink and faces are and other body parts are a blur.
<.Aeryn Sun> yeah, he was
<.Aeryn Sun> 8g*
<.Aeryn Sun> *g*, even
<.Crais> you can swoon over me if you want
<.Scorpy> *swoons again*
<.Aeryn Sun> heh
<.Aeryn Sun> i swoon over no one
<.Scorpy> *ties Crais up next to John and his arse*
<.Aeryn Sun> *is an icy pk bitch*
<.Scorpy> hee
<.John�s ass> an icy who bitch
<.Scorpy> very icy right now
<.Crais> ew, i have to be *near* the arse?
<.Aeryn Sun> hehee
<.John�s ass> *clenches*
<.Scorpy> lmao
<.Aeryn Sun> you *get* to be near his ass
<.Aeryn Sun> and lmao @ clenching
<.Crais> haha
<.Scorpy> lol!
<.Aeryn Sun> hee, and i don't even watch that shit, yo
<.Scorpy> hee
<.Crais> i suppose i should feel kinda special, getting to be near the arse and all
<.Aeryn Sun> hell yeah
<.Scorpy> it's an honour, man
<.Aeryn Sun> if you're really good, we'll let you touch it.
<.Scorpy> lol
<.Scorpy> since when do you control the arse?
<.Aeryn Sun> *touches john's ass revelantly*
<.Aeryn Sun> i am the ass master!
<.Crais> stick ya neural knife up Crichton's arse, Scorpious and watch it clench
<.Aeryn Sun> *G*
<.Scorpy> revelantly?
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Aeryn Sun> ha ha
<.Scorpy> okeydoke *does so*
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Aeryn Sun> reverently, i meant
<.Aeryn Sun> ahem
<.Scorpy> clench, damn you!
<.Crais> *likes to cause pain to John or if not John, at least his arse*
<.Scorpy> oh, wait, maybe it can't - the neural knife is already there from earlier *slaps forehead in stupidity*
<.John�s ass> *clenches
<.John�s ass> *
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Crais> lookit!
<.Scorpy> whatever *throws arms up in frustration... watches them fall*
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Aeryn Sun> lookit what?
<.Scorpy> *sticks Crais in Aurora Chair, just for the helluvit*
<.Crais> *tackles Aeryn Sun* join me on Talyn
<.Crais> leave that crew of losers on Moya
<.Aeryn Sun> get your frelling hands off me!
<.Scorpy> that's an intereting proposition
<.Aeryn Sun> i'm not going anywhere with you
<.John�s ass> *rubs self against something*
<.Aeryn Sun> you got me kicked out of the peacekeepers
<.Scorpy> yeah, she's coming with me
<.Crais> i wasn't offering it to you, Scorpy!
<.Scorpy> lol
<.Aeryn Sun> lmfao
<.Aeryn Sun> let it be me!
<.Aeryn Sun> let it be me!
<.Scorpy> no, it's me
<.Aeryn Sun> *runs to john's ass so it can rub against her*
<.John�s ass> lmao
<.Crais> oh dear
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Crais> i mean, frell
<.Scorpy> ah, a laughing arse. We should name it Mr. Ed.
<.Aeryn Sun> *mutters*....this is so fucked....
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.John�s ass> no. it's not
<.Scorpy> *wishes that he was the one being so fucked*
<.Crais> *runs over to John in red highheels*
<.Aeryn Sun> *snerk*
<.Crais> uh...John's arse
<.John�s ass> *rubs self against Scorpy* How you dooin'?
<.Scorpy> never better
<.Crais> *kicks Scorpy off John's arse* my turn!
<.Scorpy> goddamn'
<.Aeryn Sun> hey! what about me!?!
<.Scorpy> how'd you guys escape from being tied up, anyhow?
<.John�s ass> *snicker* *rubs some more*
<.Scorpy> what about you?
<.Crais> you get whatever's left, Aeryn Sun
<.Aeryn Sun> *sniff*
<.Aeryn Sun> but....but....i love the ass.
<.Scorpy> *is strangely turned on by Crais in high heels*
<.Aeryn Sun> lol
<.Scorpy> too bad, frigid skank
<.Crais> you better be
<.Aeryn Sun> lmao
<.Scorpy> you refuse John, you don't get the arse
<.Scorpy> this is what you get for deciding to be Aeryn
<.Aeryn Sun> that was temprorary insanity
<.John�s ass> *rubs around so that Aeryn can have a peak* C'mon...you know you want to reach out and grab me...........
<.Aeryn Sun> temporary, even
<.Scorpy> now if you'd been D'Argo, it might be another story
<.Aeryn Sun> lmao
<.Scorpy> yeah, it only lasted a few seasons
<.Aeryn Sun> i can't help that i'm a frigid, emotionless whore! it's my peacekeeper training!!!
<.Scorpy> suuuuuuuuure it is
[Tue Jan 01 01:36:07 EST 2002] Stark: "My side, your side! Your side, my side!�
<.Scorpy> whee!
<.Scorpy> *was hoping for Stark*
<.Stark> wheeeeeeee!
<.John�s ass> I'm..well the front of me is rigid for you, honey...c'mon sweet thing
<.Crais> on frell
<.Stark> spin, spin, spiiiiiiiiiin!
<.Crais> it's that half-faced freak
<.John�s ass> Staaark
<.John�s ass> my goodness. who do I rub for now
<.Stark> lmao
<.Scorpy> *is willing to share the arse with Stark, if he gives himself to the dark side*\
<.Crais> i'm already on the darkside:p
<.Stark> in otherwords, rub ass now, freak later. rub ass now, freak later?
<.Crais> and NOT turning good
<.Scorpy> lmao
<.Stark> fair enough
<.Stark> how much later?
<.John�s ass> Have I mentioned how much I like your cheek bones, Stark? God they'd feel good against my skin.......
<.Scorpy> okay, let's all get it on with Jonh's arse!
<.Stark> lol....
<.Scorpy> oh dear lord
<.Scorpy> *I'm* the one with the cheekbones!
<.Stark> i have no cheekbones...well, not pronounced ones, anyway
<.Stark> lol
<.Scorpy> MEMEME!
<.Crais> i'm in for a piece
<.Stark> that's scorpy
<.Stark> lmao
<.Stark> crais wants a piece of john's ass
<.John�s ass> Yeah. well.....
<.Crais> alright, but i get the left side of John's arse
<.John�s ass> anyone with cheek bones makes my day
<.Scorpy> shall we divide the arse up, then? *brandishes knives*
<.Stark> lmfao
<.John�s ass> ow.
<.Stark> no!
<.John�s ass> no
<.Stark> you musn't mar the perfection of his ass!
<.Scorpy> dang
<.John�s ass> I go in one piece. and one piece only
<.Crais> no! don't hurt it!
<.Scorpy> *pouts*
<.Stark> lol
<.Scorpy> fine, group hug, group hug
<.Stark> *forms the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Crichton's Ass
<.Stark> *
<.John�s ass> *stands there*
<.Scorpy> hee
<.Scorpy> *hugs the arse*
<.Stark> *hugs john's ass*
<.Stark> lol
<.Crais> you stand now, John's arse?
<.Stark> on his little ass-like feet
<.Stark> *g*
<.Scorpy> oh, ew
<.Crais> hehe
<.Stark> lol
<.Scorpy> *puts miniScorp in Stark's head just for that*
<.John�s ass> I do many things, honey
<.Stark> heh. oh no, there is no scorpious in my head.
<.Crais> does your miniscorp vibrate, Scorpy?
<.Scorpy> yessssssssss there issssss
<.Scorpy> lmao
<.Stark> *releases mask and helps scorpious to the "other side"*
<.Scorpy> he probably can if he wants to
<.Scorpy> but you'd have to give him some fun in return
<.Crais> *sticks vibrating miniScorp up John's arse* feel it doin' ya good
<.John�s ass> you know. I could really go for a butt plug right now. get in on some of this hot action
<.Stark> spin...spin spin spiiiiiiiiiiin
<.Stark> lmfao
<.Stark> oh gross
<.John�s ass> lmfao
<.Scorpy> ew... Stark, you ohnly just sent him to me! he was brand new! *sniff*
<.John�s ass> god that really hits the spot
<.Stark> lol
<.Crais> lol
<.Crais> lmao
<.Stark> and now he's all......ew
<.Scorpy> oh, well... as long as he's enjoying it, I guess
<.Stark> lol
<.John�s ass> *clenches and wriggles*
<.John�s ass> ooooh. more.....
<.Stark> *clutches head*
<.Crais> is any of this being saved, Stark?
<.Stark> natch
<.Scorpy> oh, god... every time I see this show, now, I'm just gonna look at John's arse and pack it
<.Stark> lol
<.Stark> pack it?
<.Stark> you're going to pack john's ass?
<.Scorpy> um... laugh
<.John�s ass> lol
<.Stark> like....with stuff?
<.Scorpy> yeah, I knew it was wrong as soon as I typed it
<.Stark> 'cause ewwwwww
<.Crais> pack his arse with miniScorp?
<.Scorpy> yeah, like you can talk, Stark
<.Stark> hmmm? *looks cherubic*
<.Scorpy> you've been wanting to pack it since you first met him
<.Stark> heh
<.Stark> oh yeah, baby
<.Stark> i totally h ave
<.Stark> *have
<.Scorpy> comforting him and all... blah
<.Stark> *tackles John's ass, running away with half of it* my cheek, your cheek, my cheek, your cheek!
<.Scorpy> john needs torture to be truly happy
<.Scorpy> hey! I thought you were preventing cruelty!
<.Crais> Stark, can i borrow your mask? i need it to cover up John's arse and keep it safe from getting scratches
<.Stark> i'll prevent cruelty to this half
<.Scorpy> *clutches other cheek desperately* don't worry, baby
<.Stark> lol....no crais, i hate you.
<.Crais> you love me!
<.Stark> i hate you!
<.Stark> your kind kept me enslaved!
<.Crais> love me, hate you, love me, hate you!
<.Stark> lol
<.Crais> but it's for the good of John's arse
<.Crais> you're all for protecting the arse, right?
<.Stark> i'm protecting my half!
<.John�s ass> *falls*
<.Stark> my half, your half! now, stay on your half!
<.Scorpy> *cluthces arse* nooooooooo!
<.Scorpy> you're not gonna die!
<.Stark> lol
<.Scorpy> baby, you are not going to die like this
<.Crais> breath, damn you!
<.Stark> lmfao
<.Stark> *whispers to john's ass* say "I don't have any options*
<.Stark> "
<.Scorpy> *single tear tracks down cheek*
<.Crais> the arse has no options left
<.Scorpy> lmao
<.Stark> then say " i hope you meant what you said in the neural cluster...i did!"
<.Stark> then you crash and die
<.Stark> *g*
<.Crais> all you can shed is a single frelling tear?!
<.Scorpy> lol]
<.Crais> at least i yelled into the air!
<.Scorpy> well, I *am* evil
<.Scorpy> I yelled too!
<.Stark> lmfao
<.Stark> @ yelling into the air
<.Scorpy> Oh, God... what have I done? *looks stunned*
<.Stark> lol
<.Crais> you know what you did
<.Crais> you meant to do it
<.Scorpy> shuddup
<.Crais> cause you're evil
<.John�s ass> what? what happened? where am I?
<.Scorpy> not where the arse is concerned!
<.Scorpy> um, at your icy deathpit
<.Stark> lmao
<.Stark> john's ass is dazed and confused
<.Scorpy> *fished halfarse out of the water* breathe, damn you!
<.Scorpy> *fishes
<.Stark> heh
<.Crais> *retrieves the arse and puts it in whatever the hell Aeryn was in*
<.Stark> lmfao @ halfarse
<.Scorpy> *gives mouth to mouth on arse*
<.Crais> oh frell
<.Crais> beat me to it
<.Stark> oh yuck!
<.Scorpy> well, halfarse
<.Stark> lol
<.Scorpy> oh, as if you don't wanna do the same
<.Stark> not with my mouth!!!
<.Scorpy> oh, crap, it's already in the container? damn
<.Scorpy> yeah ya do
<.Stark> god, what kind of sick, disgusting freak are you?!
<.Stark> lol
<.Crais> *pushes Scorpy out of the way* i know i do
<.Crais> j/k;)
<.Stark> lmao
<.John�s ass> who's mouth is on me?
<.Scorpy> *mourns* it was the best of all of us\
<.Stark> lol
<.John�s ass> whose*
<.Scorpy> lmao
<.John�s ass> *clenches*
<.Crais> way better than you
<.Scorpy> hee
<.Scorpy> much, much better
<.Stark> lol
<.Scorpy> it threw off the chains of prejudice and hatred
<.Scorpy> *weeps* we killed it! our selfishness!
<.Stark> gah!
<.Stark> was that a freaking sins of the father quote?!
<.Stark> motherfuckinghell!!!
<.Crais> we lost the arse cause we couldn't learn to share
<.Scorpy> what?
<.Stark> throwing off the chains of prejudice?
<.Stark> hm
<.Stark> no, i guess it's "throwing off the chains of racism"
<.Scorpy> no, that was from Die Me, Dichotomy, you freak
<.Stark> okay, nm
<.Stark> i hate that shit
<.Stark> lol
<.Stark> hm, i don't remember that line
<.John�s ass> me too
<.Stark> zhaan say it?
<.Scorpy> ya
<.Stark> down with sins of the father!!!
<.John�s ass> lol
<.Stark> *beats sins of the father to a bloody pulp*
<.Scorpy> don't take out your grief on the feeble, stark
<.Crais> *looks at arse threw case*
<.Scorpy> *cuts off a lock of arse's hair*
<.Stark> you threw what?
<.Stark> lmfao
<.Stark> oh yuck
<.Stark> again, i say yuck
<.Crais> hey!
<.Stark> asshair!
<.Scorpy> *kisses arse*
<.Crais> that arse hair is mnie!
<.Stark> lol
<.Crais> give it!
<.Crais> mnie*
<.Scorpy> I challenge you to a duel!
<.Crais> mine
<.Crais> i accept your challenge
<.Scorpy> *pulls out a spoon* en garde!
<.John�s ass> *gets in the middle of the dual* I want the winner
<.Crais> *sticks neural knife in Scorpy's back*
<.Scorpy> dude, you're dead!
<.Stark> lol.....careful crais, scorpy eats brains.
<.Scorpy> aw, fuck, paralysed by my own neural knife
<.Stark> lol
<.Scorpy> yeah, like that's a problem for him
<.Crais> haha!
<.Stark> ha
<.Stark> !
<.Crais> foiled by your own neural kinfe!
<.Scorpy> luckily, I put a neural clone in crais's head in s1
<.Stark> lol
<.Scorpy> ::crais... crais... abandon the arse::
<.Crais> knife*
<.Scorpy> ::the arse is mine::
<.Crais> abandon your own arse
<.Scorpy> ::you cannot escape::
<.Scorpy> lol
<.Crais> lalala, i'm not listening
<.John�s ass> *rams self against nearest rod like object*
<.Scorpy> ::now remove the knife! remove it! remove it! remove it!::
<.Scorpy> you're DEAD!
<.Scorpy> stop moving!
<.Crais> oh go play the drums!
<.Scorpy> *plays drums on john's arse*
<.Stark> lmao
<.Crais> *hand starts to remove neural knife from Scorpy* what the frell??
<.Scorpy> bloody weird freaky people *grumbles*
<.Scorpy> REMOVE IT!!
<.John�s ass> god that feels good...drum harder
<.Stark> *snserk*
<.Stark> *snerk*, even
<.Scorpy> removeitremoveitremoveit
<.Crais> shouldn't you be saying, "shove it in!", Scorpy?
<.Crais> "deeper! deeper!"
<.Scorpy> oh, ew
<.Stark> *smacks head*
<.John�s ass> not yet.. I wanna warm up first
<.Scorpy> this was just a little spankage thing
<.Stark> lmao
<.Stark> we need some lubrication
<.Scorpy> insertion is the big finale
<.Crais> i'll be back in a jiffy
<.John�s ass> I liiiiiiiike it rough
<.Scorpy> *puts some K-Y on the glove*
<.John�s ass> *bounces*
<.Stark> lol
<.Crais> *comes back with lurbication*
<.Stark> is that like, the angelbounce?
<.Crais> lubrication*
<.John�s ass> no. it's...more of a some other kind of bounch
<.John�s ass> bounce
<.Stark> lol
<.Crais> *jumps onto undead John's arse case*
<.Crais> *taps on case*
<.Stark> hee. john's arse is undead
<.Crais> helloooooooooooo
<.John�s ass> *bucks*
<.Stark> *gets beat up by crais*
<.Stark> *gets beat up by scorpious*
<.Stark> *gets beat up by everyone*
<.Crais> <.Stark> *gets ebat up by undead John's arse*
<.Crais> beat*
<.Stark> *is attuned to the deaths of thousands of slaves*
<.Stark> *gets held against Zhaan's bosom*
<.Crais> whoops
<.Crais> did i kill them?
<.Stark> no, scorpy did
<.John�s ass> *sits*
<.Crais> whoopsiedoodle
<.Stark> that cadaverous bastard
<.Stark> anda lmao
<.Crais> oh
<.Stark> *and
<.Crais> nm then
<.Crais> i just enslaved them right?
<.Stark> heh.....you just watched that episode, don't you remember?
<.Stark> no
<.Stark> crais had nothing to do with them
<.Crais> before you were saying you hated me for some reason
<.Crais> what was it?
<.Stark> because you were a peacekeeper
<.Stark> and i don't trust you
<.Stark> i hate peacekeepers
<.Crais> oh
<.Crais> phfft
<.Crais> i don't trust me
<.Crais> only sil does
<.Crais> and Aeryn
<.Crais> but she's dead
<.Stark> lol
[Tue Jan 01 02:10:49 EST 2002] Scorpy's Arse: I NEEEEED MOOOORE ARRRSE!
<.Scorpy�s arse> blah
<.Stark> *feels weird at hearing sil referred to in the third person*
<.Stark> ugh
<.Stark> no way!
<.Crais> hahaha
<.Crais> lmao
<.Stark> nobody wants your ass!!
<.Stark> literally!
<.Crais> i do!
<.Crais> not
<.Scorpy�s arse> oh, frell you
<.Crais> haha
<.Scorpy�s arse> John's arse wants me
<.Crais> false hope of your arse being loved
<.John�s ass> *sits on stark*
<.Crais> haha
<.Scorpy�s arse> well, the rest of me will be back in here properly once my ghost disappears
<.Scorpy�s arse> and then, since the rest of me is the master of you all, John's arse shall be MINE!!!
<.Crais> well i haveta go now, so bye John's arse......*just looks at everyone else and says nothing*
<.Scorpy�s arse> oh, how conveeenient
<.Scorpy�s arse> leave when I come
<.Scorpy�s arse> you can't handle being in the same room as me
<.Stark> lol
<.Scorpy�s arse> 'cause I turn you on
<.Stark> lmao
<.Scorpy�s arse> and you can't admit it to yourself
<.Crais> i *dont* wanna be in the same room as you
<.Crais> you're gross
<.Crais> discusting arse
<.Stark> *gags at the thought of anyone being turned on by scorpy's ass*
<.Scorpy�s arse> crais is in deniiiiiial, crais is in deniiiiiial
<.Stark> hee
<.Scorpy�s arse> well, scorpy *does* have nice legs
<.Scorpy�s arse> but that's neither here nor there
<.Stark> *aghast*
<.Crais> denial this! *plasts Scorpy's arse into little pieces of Scorpy arse*
<.John�s ass> *rubs self against scorpy's ass*
<.Crais> blasts*
<.Scorpy�s arse> see, John's arse loves me
<.Scorpy�s arse> *reforms self like mercury*
<.John�s ass> No. I just like the way you make me feel
<.Crais> frell
<.Stark> lmfao
<.Scorpy�s arse> you're just using me? *gasp*
<.John�s ass> couldn't you tell?
<.Stark> yeah.....scorpy's arse is supposed to be treading on the dark side. what's your excuse?
<.Scorpy�s arse> *whimpers*
<.Crais> it's been fun while it lasted, John's arse, but i must go. i'll write you every day!
<.Scorpy�s arse> lmao
<.Stark> heh
<.John�s ass> I just wanna feel
<.Stark> lol
<.Scorpy�s arse> I tread on the dark side, mmm?
<.Crais> will you write me back?
<.John�s ass> This..all this..it isn't real
<.Scorpy�s arse> *treads*
<.Stark> hee
<.Scorpy�s arse> *bitchslaps John's arse*
<.Scorpy�s arse> foul skank!
<.Crais> *leaves in Talyn*
<.Crais> sknak skank
<.Crais> skank*
<.Scorpy�s arse> I am *so* getting revenge on you once I'm back to my full self
<.Stark> lol
<.Scorpy�s arse> revenge is a dish best served cold, and I like revenge, don't I
<.Stark> *would quote some more, but only watched that ep once*
<.Scorpy�s arse> you're supposed to tell me to shut up
<.Stark> *sniff*
<.Stark> *mourns the absence of toon stark*
<.Scorpy�s arse> and say that you hate it when villain's arses quote shakespeare
<.Stark> oh, right right
<.Scorpy�s arse> damnit, I was quoting CDM
<.Stark> wrong ep, then
<.Stark> i thought it was RA
<.Scorpy�s arse> you only saw RA once?
<.Stark> ya
<.Scorpy�s arse> even though you have all the sounds on your site? weird
<.Stark> and lol @ villains arses quoting shakespeare
<.Stark> of RA? yeah. i just fastfowarded to the ones i wanted
<.Scorpy�s arse> well, whose fault is it that you haven't seen it more tha once, then?
<.Scorpy�s arse> *snuggles up to John's arse*
<.Stark> heh
<.John�s ass> *wriggles* Oooh. don't you feel nice
<.Scorpy�s arse> I do
<.Stark> though i did stop to watch toon d'argo's jaw drop when john went through the wormhold on the side of the cliff. t'was amusing.
<.Scorpy�s arse> hee
<.Scorpy�s arse> you and your wormholds
<.Stark> oh fucking hell
<.Stark> *sigh*
<.Stark> goddamnit!
<.Stark> why, why, why?
<.John�s ass> lmfao..and also *clenches*
<.Stark> why can't i type it right?
<.Scorpy�s arse> ah, it's okay. You're insane, you can get away with it
<.Stark> *sobs*
<.Scorpy�s arse> godDAMN!
<.Stark> lol
<.Scorpy�s arse> *clenches back*
<.Stark> that one and fucking "abou tit" are my two most common typos
<.Stark> and maybe also "teh" , instead of the
<.Scorpy�s arse> 'cause it's all about the tit
<.Stark> lol
<.Scorpy�s arse> sigh... I think that the departure of Crais has had a sad effect on this convo
<.Stark> oh man, my puter's being so slow. *sigh*
<.Stark> heh
<.Scorpy�s arse> or maybe it's a de-saddening
<.Stark> alas, where did our wild-haired captain go, anyway?
<.John�s ass> I love me some "abou tit's" Mmmmmbaby
<.Stark> lol
<.Stark> *sigh* i've been here for two hours almost and i haven't done any work on my site at all
<.Stark> which is distressing, considering i planned on coming in to finish it.
<.Scorpy�s arse> heh
<.Stark> dude, your ghost is still here. lol....we're all in between scorpy and his ass.
<.Scorpy�s arse> hee
<.Scorpy�s arse> be... in me.
<.Stark> lol
<.Stark> ew

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