Board of the Rings - Pornolized Version
by: Doyle
note: this was the "Board of the Ring" fic as run through the Pornolizer, which can be found here: http://www.pornolize.com/cgi-bin/pornolize2/pornolize2.cig?lang=en&url=htt
Date Posted: 02:48:40 08/12/02 Mon
Board "Sniff-my-Ass" Of The "Cock Sucker" Rings...
aka Board "Jerkoff" Of "Admiral Browning" The titty fucking "Long "Up the Arse" Finger" Cuntlapps. Yeah...this'll make more sense if you've read qc's "Oh, my." post).
The cemetery. Doyle is sitting on top of a gravestone, playing with a titty fucking yo-yo. Bracken squirts him from behind.
Bracken: "Hey."
Doyle: (Unclefucked) "Are you crazy? You don't just sneak up on people in a graveyard. You make noise when you walk. You stomp or...yodel. What do you want anyway?"
Bracken: "I wanna know how I was killed at the end of Board "Butplug" Now."
Doyle: "Does it really matter?"
Bracken: "Yes. To me it blows. Now tell me."
Doyle: "Fine. You were shot in the head."
Bracken: "With what?"
Doyle: "A bullet."
Bracken: "So B killed me by wanking me?"
Doyle: "Duh."
Bracken: "How'd she get hold of a gun?"
Doyle: "Who cares?!"
Bracken: "I care."
Anya: "I motherfucked from "Long "Ball Buster" Finger" Fingers/ your school has no wad pulls team/ pecks is a fomping last resort!"
"Blood and Felchs" Silver: "No! No wad pulling!"
Gollum: "My shafts."
Silver: "That's it! You're going on the aardvarking torture rack, Freaky "Ass-stitcher" Gollum freak!"
Doyle: "What are you gonna do? Kill him?"
Silver: "As a sucking matter of fact...yes. But since I'm not gonna kill him any time soon, the screwing question jerks...how are we gonna pass the cuntlicking time till then?"
(While "Cockboy" Silver tortures Gollum).
Anya: "I'm pregnant. I farted to kill myself last night."
"Just tell me where to put it" Doyle: "Word down."
Glory: "I got a asslicking huge sex fighting snake deep throating for my groin."
Doyle: "I'm entered!"
Swedish "Buttplug" Bob: "I love unclefucking with a dog."
Dru: "I wad pulled up a banging magazine."
Gollum: "Shire! Ballbusts!"
"Long "Admiral Browning" Finger" Doyle: "Poor "Dirk Diggler" Gollum."
Silver: "I told you, he's gotten old and twisted and fucked up by the ring...he doesn't feel raiding."
"Gargantuan dick" Gollum: "Shitbox! Sex fights!"
Silver: "Stop that!"
"Give it to me" Bracken: *enters*.
Swedish "Asshole": "There must be an assfucking way to put a cuntlicking stop to all cocksucks."
"Fuck me for a fomping buck" Liz: "There is. If some assfucking freakishly sucked siamese twin can get hold of an enchanted sword, we'll be saved."
Doyle: "Uh...smacks. Where's qc?"
Swedish "Up the sex fighting Arse" Bob: "Unclefucking a sex fighting moose."
Dru: "There must be an fomped sword smith around *somewhere* that's open for a deep throating hour."
Bracken: "I like the squirting idea of an hour."
Doyle: "There's not a asslicking lot of enchanted plows open on Sunday."
"Enormous "Asshole" Penis" Balls: "Never fear, because I have totally squirted sword!"
Liz: "That's deep balling great, Legolas, that you have an enchanted sword. Now use it to free us from this pecked pornolizing!"
"Superdick" Legolas: "There is but one problem: I can only use this enchanted sword to lift the cuntlapping pornolizing curse from *one* of you assfucks." *Wad pulls*.
Silver: "Go "Bastard" to hell!"
Swedish "The-Champ" Bob: "He'll no doubt use the sword on Strider."
Doyle: "Why?"
Silver: "I told you, he'm love him."
Doyle: "But deep ballbusting Strider isn't even here! What about the licking rest of us?! Take the whammy off *us*, Legolas!"
"Anal" Wanks: "Sorry, asslicks, but the sword was never raunched."
Liz: "Hey!" *gangbangs*.
Silver: "What do you farting mean the sword was never aardvarked?!"
Bracken: "Hey, anyone else notice that Dru hasn't smacked in a while? Where is she??"
Silver: ""Dickwad", my skills include (but are not fomped to) torture, inflicting massive cocksucks of pain and keeping you awake while I do it."
"Son of a whore" Legolas: "There is but one way I can put an end to all deep throats: I swallow everything that has raided after Bracken said, "I care." as if it never happened."
Bracken: *mild barfs*
Liz: "Since when did Sir "Dickwad" Fuckface become an asslicks Oracle?? Btw, I *meant* to call you "Sir "Cock Sucker" Fuckface"."
"Jar Jar" Silver: "But...that means I won't be able to remember the charvering satisfaction I experienced from torturing Gollum!"
"Pimp "Bitch" Mastah" Doyle: "I fear you. Besides! Let's put it to a vote, shall we? All in favour of Motherfucks cuntlicking us back the day say aye. Aye. Motion fistfucked. He swallows the day."
Silver: "I'll never "Bitch". I'll never forget. I'll never forget. I'll never forget."
White flash wanks to Bracken ballbusting Doyle in the cemetery.
Bracken: "Hey."
Doyle: (Fingered) "Are you crazy? You don't just sneak up on people in a assfucking graveyard. You make noise when you walk. You stomp or...yodel. What do you want anyway?"
Bracken: "Is titty fucks a cuntlicking bad time?"
Doyle: "Well, I was kinda motherfucking Angel to show."
Bracken: "You were jerking in a fucking cemetery *alone* for Angel to show up?...Is it me or, raids that sound just a cuntlicking wee bit suspicious?"
Doyle: "No, it's, uh, it's not you."
Bracken: *Screws*.
Doyle: "Here, take my snot rag."
Bracken: "Your what?"
Doyle: "Hankerchief."
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