She Knows
He imagines her reciting the name of each bone, each muscle, as she touches his skin, and he shivers. His body becomes a map for her fingers to trace, a treasure quest meant for her eyes only. He thinks she�s the only one he�d ever grant this to, the only one he�d let expose him so completely.
It�s all about time. Time he never took. Time he never wanted. Time he used to chase when he was with Penny. But she�s taking her time now, fingertips dancing over his knuckles and through the most innocent of touches, he feels a jolt of excitement curse down his spine. He�s painfully aware of the way his chest heaves with every breath, but he won�t do a thing to hurry her.
He can�t, even if he wants to� which, incidentally, he doesn�t. He�s at her mercy and despite logic and reason telling him otherwise, he decides it�s not a bad place to be, if it means she�ll let him hold her like this, without any barrier between them. He imagines she agrees, if her Cheshire Cat grin is anything to go by. It�s gone in a second and so are her hands, but he can still feel the places she touched aching, throbbing gently with numb satisfaction.
�Now you know how I felt every night we were alone in the lab,� she says and he wonders how plain his thoughts must be to her. He can only blame himself for falling prey to her womanly charms. �I could feel your hands� hours after you left me on my own,� she purrs in his ear and it�s all he can do restrain himself. She�s always been honest with him, but never more so than now.
When her lips trace his collarbone, he wonders that she should suddenly be so bold. He had usually gotten the impression that he was corrupting her, all those nights she was referring to. He can�t pretend he minds this new facet of her personality, even as he�s more accustomed to seeing her flirtations as affection rather than sexual innuendo.
It�s a change and that�s why they�re here in the first place.
�What are you thinking about?� she asks and her eyes are big and brown, but heavy with desire. There�s nothing of the innocent girl Leo�s always trying to protect in her now. She�s an entirely different person and he feels a surge of pride knowing he is the one to have uncovered this hidden side of her.
�I�m thinking that�this is new,� he says and he watches the slightest flicker of doubt pass before her eyes. His hand slips down her back and he enjoys the shudder that passes through her. She�s not immune to him. Though she may be braver, she�s still Nikki and he knows her. Intimately. �I�m thinking,� he adds, rolling her onto her back and covering her body with his, �that it�s a pity you didn�t say anything about your� pains,� he can�t hold back a grin, �sooner.�
�You mean it�s a pity my flat wasn�t flooded sooner.� She smiles back, but he doesn�t anticipate her touching him. It�s only a slight disappointment when she takes his hand in hers instead of another part of his body, but he gets over it the moment his gaze meets hers. �I�ve always liked your hands,� she tells him and he really thinks it should be illegal to want someone so much.
A second later, he feels ready to eat his words as she presses his hand against her sternum, where he feel her ribcage rise and fall with every breath. Her eyelids fall closed but he can�t stop watching her. He�s ready to kiss her when her hand leaves his and it�s as much an invitation as his offer to take her in for the night. Neither is out of the goodness of their hearts, but rather selfishly designed to quench a thirst for the other.
He probably shouldn�t be speaking for her, but he can admit that�s why he offered, when she came into the office in the morning. It had been in hopes that his evening might play out exactly as it did and, selfish as that was, he hadn�t seen her object to the way he had placed his hand on her thigh as he was driving; nor the predatory way in which he had followed her into the bedroom.
Her lips part on a sigh and he can�t help but touch her. For a moment, she indulges him and it only makes him harder. But then, her hand takes his again and with a kiss, she moves it back to her sternum, watching his eyes as she releases him.
�Please,� she moans and he feels blind desire ripple through him. He knows what she wants, what she needs. They�ve been through this many times; always on the run, always stopping before it got too far. But they don�t need to stop anymore.
His hand shakes on her chest and he wants to give her this night. This reassurance. But he finds he doesn�t want to take her. He wants her to give it to him. He wants her to be as defenceless as he feels; as willing, as far lost inside him.
�Harry, please,� she whispers again, �don�t make me beg�� On any other occasion, he doesn�t think he would mind that, but not tonight.
Tonight he wants her. He wants her so much it hurts and he�s sure his grip on her arse must hurt when he lifts her up and onto his lap. It earns him a surprised gasp as her lax body obeys and he barely gives her time to brush the blonde hair out of her eyes, before he presses his mouth where she would have wanted his hands. She�s out of balance for only a moment, and then her hands find support on his shoulders and she lets him hold her up, as he knew she would.
It isn�t long before he swirls his tongue against her skin and she presses his head against her, letting out a sound of surprise. He glances up only to find her flushed and vulnerable, her lips parted in a silent moan.
�Do that again,� she demands, and he does. Again and again until he feels her tremble in his arms. He lets her down easily, hoping that once she�s regained enough of her wits to speak, she won�t ask where he learned that. Many a girlfriend did and hated the answer. He doesn�t want their first to be a last.
Looking at her as she slumps against him, body hot with satisfaction, he thinks it�s probably nothing new to her, either. He knows little of the particulars, but he knows she�s no virgin. She�s smiling, though, and that must be a good sign.
�I stand corrected. I like your mouth much better�� she gives him a wide smile and he realises he�s being a fool. Before he can reply, her hands are pushing him down and he�s pinned under her weight. It�s not her thin body that holds him down however, but her powerful gaze and the promises of a future he�s never dreamed of comprised within it.
He wants to listen to everything she has to say, wants to wait for every chosen moment. He even considers postponing his heartbeats just to give hers his undivided attention. Yet he can�t and the moment she thinks she has him pinned down, he rolls over with her and captures her tightly.
It�s a game of hide-and-seek, except he knows where she is, he just doesn�t know what she wants. With any other girl, he wouldn�t be so concerned, but with Nikki, it matters. Her breath hitches and he instantly knows why. Yes, he can feel her too.
�Just seeing you like this is almost enough to make me�� he whispers, but doesn�t finish. She knows, she understands.
�Me too,� she gasps and he can feel her arching her back, her body pressing into his. It�s no wonder when her leg snakes around his to hold him close. He knows she�s enjoying this as much as he is. He can feel it in the way her hips brush against his, so insistently.
�Stop,� he asks and realises he�s the one begging.
�Do you want me, Harry?� she asks, searching his eyes. A soothing hand comes to rest on his lower back and he has to close his eyes before he can meet her gaze. She�s understanding only for a second and then her lips are on his and he�s intoxicated.
�I want you,� he bites out in between kisses. �I want you so much.� Her lips are hot on his, desperate, as if they�ve never kissed before. They never have, not like this. Nothing has ever been this good, this right. �I want to fuck you,� he whispers in her ear, thrusting up against her. �I want to�� Did he say too much? Did he scare her off?
Her smile is radiant, passionate. She brushes her fingers through his hair and he feels his heart swell. It�s an unexpected breath of fresh air that fills his lungs when he looks up to find so much affection in her eyes, and he momentarily wonders where the vixen has gone.
He holds her tight, tighter that he�s held any woman and he wonders if she can feel it. Can feel the way his heart�s beating, racing for her. He buries his head in the crook of her neck and closes his eyes, never wanting the moment to end. It�s too perfect, too right to last. He can feel it shattering and holds on even tighter. He�ll never let go. Never again. He fears he might crush her, break her, but she�s stronger than she looks. He�s learned that the hard way.
He�s only faintly surprised when she answers back by pressing her body against his, letting him have this. He thinks she understands the unbearable need to hold on. Her entire body is warm with the invitation and when he falls off the edge of the precipice, she�s his safety-net, undulating under his fingers like the chords of a harp and producing the softest sounds he�s ever heard.
�Nikki�� he gasps and presses his thumb where he knows to make her keen. �That�s it,� he encourages when he feels her hips quiver and her arms lock around him. He doesn�t let go until it�s over, until her moans of pleasure turn to pleas and even then, he holds her tightly, savouring the moment.
This is the first time they�ve made it to a bed. It�s also the first time they�ve ever been this serious. They�ve had months of foreplay, never the real thing, but she must have known, he thinks. She must have felt it, anticipated it. He isn�t sure why he�s so certain of it, but he can feel it in her smile before she speaks.
�You know, my flat wasn�t actually flooded.�
He doesn�t want to answer and doesn�t think she expects a reply. She�s being honest and he lets her off with a pat on her thigh.
Later, he studies her face as she sleeps; her body flush against his side. A whisper comes to his lips unbidden. �I could love you,� he says and thinks he sees her eyelashes flutter in recognition. He�s worried only for a moment before kissing her cheek.
All the better if she heard.