| This is the only approved fanlisting for Tom Lehrer's
addictive song, Silent E. A fanlisting is a place for all fans of a
particular show, movie, actor/actress, singer, etc. to come together
and build the biggest listing of people from all around the world who
are fans of that subject. In this case, the subject is the song "Silent
E" by Tom Lehrer.
Who is Tom Lehrer? To steal Mr. Lehrer's own introduction from "Tom
Lehrer Revisited"...
I'd like to introduce now the featured artist of this evening's ordeal.
I'm sure that you'll all agree without any hesitation that Tom Lehrer
is the most brilliant creative genius that America has produced in
almost 200 years, so perhaps a few words of biographical background
might not be amiss. Endowed by nature with perhaps the most glorious
baritone voice to be heard on an American stage since the memorable
concert debut in 1835 of Millard Fillmore; endowed also with twelve
incredibly agile fingers; Mr. Lehrer has had a long and varied career
in the field of entertainment starting with nine years at Harvard
University, where it was that he first decided to devote his life
to what has since become a rather successful scientific project, namely,
the attempt to prolong adolescence beyond all previous limits.
Even before he came to Harvard, however, he was well known in academic
circles for his masterly translation into Latin of "The Wizard of
Oz", which remains even today the standard Latin version of that work.
A few years ago, he was inducted forcibly into the United States
Army and spent most of his indenture in Washington as sort of Army
liaison to the Office of Naval Contemplation. About his service record
he is justifiably modest, but it is known that in a short time he
rose to the rank of brigadier general. However, before he could acquire
a tenure, he was discharged, and owing to nepotism and intrigue, he
emerged with only the rank of specialist 3rd class, which was roughly
equivalent to the rank of corporal without portfolio.
But to return to his career in show business: for several years he
toured vaudeville theaters with an act consisting of impressions of
people in the last throes of various diseases. I'm sure that many
of you here tonight still recall with pleasure his memorable diphtheria
imitation. He is generally acknowledged to be the dean of living American
composers, and is currently working on a musical comedy based on the
life of Adolf Hitler.
Without further ado: Tom Lehrer!
In the early 70's, Mr. Lehrer wrote about ten songs for The Electric
Company, a television program designed to teach children to read. Two
of these are now available on his records, and one of them is Silent
E. Following are the lyrics to Silent E:
Who can turn a can into a cane?
Who can turn a pan into a pane?
It's not too hard to see,
It's Silent E!
Who can turn a cub into a cube?
Who can turn a tub into a tube?
It's elementary,
For Silent E!
He took a pin and turned it into pine,
He took a twin and turned him into twine.
Who can turn a cap into a cape?
Who can turn a tap into a tape?
A little glob becomes a globe instantly,
If you just add Silent E!
He turned a dam - Alakazam! - into a dame,
But my friend Sam stayed just the same.
Who can turn a man into a mane?
Who can turn a van into a vane?
A little hug becomes huge instantly.
Don't add W, don't add X, and don't add Y or Z,
Just add Silent E!
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