The Backside Shooter

"The Back Side Shooter"

The first poem I ever wrote "A BRAND NEW BILLFOLD", is in the book "Back Side Shooter". This poem came to mind after an unfortunate wreck. I just adapted it to fit in the days of yesteryear, all I really had with me was a single blade pocket-knife and, after the wreck, a bent up cigar. Hope you enjoy it!

"A Brand New Billfold"

Last year about mid August,
When my birthday rolled around,
My wife, a dear sweet lady, said,
"I got to go to town."

That night we had a party,
With ice cream and cake and such,
When she hands me up this present sayin',
"I know this isn't much."

So I commenced to rippin' paper,
Found a box and flipped off the lid,
And in amongst the packin',
I uncovered what she'd hid.

A brand spankin' new billfold,
Made of top-grain bullhide see,
Now she knows I got no money,
But it's the thought that counts with me.

I didn't think I would need it,
Till the middle of next week,
So I shoved it in a hip pocket,
And kissed her, THANK YA, on the cheek.

Next morning' I went ridin',
Runnin' heifers thru the pass,
When my horse was spooked by a rattler
And I landed on my.......rump!

My horse was gone; I was alone,
And in dew wet grass I sat.
With nothing hurt I began wonderin',
Just where that snake was at.

I looked; but I didn't see him.
I listened; but I didn't hear.
So up on one knee I struggled,
Squared my hat and wiped back a tear.

Then I heard him start to rattlin',
When the wind blew off my hat.
And I knew that snake would strike me,
But, the question was, "where at?".

I pulled my trusty six-gun,
My gun hand shook with fear.
That snake just kept on rattlin',
LORD, I knowed that he was near!

Then the rattlin' stopped! I felt a bump!
And to me it was perfectly clear!
If it hadn't been for that billfold,
He'd a got me.......from the rear!

My books sell for $6.95 each or any two for $12.00. Each book shipped is signed and dated making them some what of a collectors item ( or at least they will be when I am dead and gone. So buy them for your grand kids, they can make the $12.00 back! ).

Please check out the book review by Joyce Faulkner of "The Shooter" at
"The Celebrity Cafe"

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