| "Target: Honesty" | ||
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Morgan, New Jersey 2200 hours May 7, 2008 Having driven around the complex a couple of times Eric parked the car with other vehicles of residents, secured it, and checked his own appearance in the side view mirror. It would have to do. He still had his folding pocket knife, but no other weapons to speak of. He would not be a threat. Top button of the work shirt undone, tan leather jacket half way unzipped and smoothed, all was ready. He composed himself, adjusted his grip on the grocery bag, and walked up to the building. His eyes roved constantly behind the Ray Bans as his mind roved over ways of gaining admittance to the building. He'd considered various ways of breaking in, being proficient at several. It wouldn't cast the right light on his activities, however, breaking in to apologize for ruining her life, or whatever she thought he'd done. No, he must be civilized about it, which would mean using a more tactful means of entry. He didn't waste time trying to think through multiple plans, but was alert for something to come along. There it was, someone exiting the building, struggling with a load. He jogged forward. "Hey there! Why don't you let me help you with those, eh?" The lady stopped and considered, surprised, suspicious, then resumed her struggle. "Hey, fine. I'll just hold the door for you. There you go. Have a nice evening." She was gone with a grunt, and he was in with a slight smile, bottles clanking behind him in the bag as he took the stairs, his pace slowing as he neared the second floor. Her door was there, third on the left. He stopped, composing himself, being sure to breath evenly and bring his heart rate back under control, turned to the door, and knocked twice. Paige had struggled with the last rep of the current set. She was still amazed at how good her shoulder and ribs still felt. For some reason, she always just expected that pain to come back. The last two days had been a grueling battle of wills between herself and the Tigers, and they had yet to break the second primer. The stalker, the paranoia was all she could deal with. The knock at the door took her by surprise and that moments break in concentration pulled on her arms almost snapping her bicep. She grimaced and released the handle slowly. She shook her arm as she picked her weapon off the table. She was not expecting anyone. And the only 'anyone' that would come over never knocked...he simply walked in. There was a significant moment's pause, as nothing seemed to be happening, but there were small sounds from inside, perhaps of the quiet movements of human occupants. He could not be sure, but had that feeling in the pit of his stomach, and stepped back from the door to where he could be easily seen through the peephole. Paige approached the door her heart pounding. Perhaps, her stalker had finally come to kill her? But why would he knock? To be funny? And why did she automatically assume it was male? She looked through the peephole seeing the last person she ever expected to be there. Her head slumped forward as she rested her forehead on the door. She couldn't let him in. Why did he come here? How the hell did he know where she lived? Still no response, and he considered knocking again, tried to think of some signal from their good times together, which he might use to gain a response from the one within. Nothing came to mind, but as he moved in preparation to knock, the bottles in his grocery bag clanked together conspicuously. She heard the bottles and caught herself before she grinned. At least he was smart enough to have brought a peace offering. Still, he HAD almost killed her and she remained on guard as she opened the door. As if drawn by the sound, she opened the door, and the two regarded each other. She looked good, physically, but a haunting fear, or was it suspicion, clouded her eyes. She might have tried to hide it, but the lack of sleep and abundance of worry were evident in her slack facial musculature. Her attire was interesting, and under better circumstances might have held his interest for some time, consisting primarily of a sports bra and spandex/cotton workout shorts. He had other priorities, though, and prepared to greet her, as she stared blankly out at him. She was quicker, for the moment. "What do you want?" she snapped at him. He bowed his head a little, smiling respectfully, and removed his shades with his free hand. He put them in his shirt pocket, and, his eyes momentarily lowered, noticed her gun. He'd better speak and make it quick. "I want to talk, or to listen, if you have something to say. We might work together in the future, and I want our issues resolved." He paused for a moment to allow her to respond, and was rewarded only with the one word. Issues? She regarded him evenly, they had never had the opportunity to talk about what happened between them...their 'issues'. Check that, they had, and she had pushed him away. So be it. "Talk," she said. His arm grew tired even then, and he began to bring it out from behind his back. Her eyes narrowed as the alarm spread through her. Would he finally kill her now? Not leave it to someone else, but do it like a man? With his own hands? "Do not worry. I am unarmed." She stared at him for a moment trying to catch her racing thoughts. Of course not, she told herself. That would be stupid...to come hear expecting to resolve issues and bring a gun? Could she be any more paranoid? "Fine" she said flatly, gesturing for him to enter. "Thank you." He walked in, and directly to the nearest counter, on which he placed the bag before turning back to her, his senses on edge, his heart rate beginning to increase. He kept his outward appearance relatively neutral in-spite of it, his breathing even and quiet. Suddenly he stopped, took a deep breath, and blew it out. "There have been other men here." "What?" she asked, as though confused. She had not been prepared for a statement like that. Eric suspected, however, that he'd been correct in his guess, and her confusion was at his apparent knowing, or perhaps was even feigned to hide the facts. He again searched for her eyes, attempting to learn whatever he could through those windows into her soul. Often the best way to get information was to pretend you already had it, and look for confirmation or refutation. Even the slightest body language, tightening of the muscles, could be signs. "I can smell..." another sniff, but more importantly, more time looking at Paige "...him." Smell. Though Joshua wore no cologne, had no particular shampoo or soap, he still had a distinctive scent...or at least to Paige he did. It was why she liked wearing his clothes and sleeping with his pillow and blankie. How would Kihn pick that up? Should have lit the stupid candle she scolded herself. A small flick of the eyes toward the candle? Not something this "He" would have given her, or it would have been lit when he was here. And Eric was sure, now, that another male had been here more recently than that candle had been lit. Candles. They'd had candles when they'd trained together. What did it mean, her having one here? He held his eyes on her, waiting for what she would deign to reveal to him outright of the man that had been here. Instead, she squared her shoulders, set her jaw, and snapped. "That's none of your business," she hissed at him. Once again her brain reorganized itself to be on the attacking side of whatever conversation might commence. She always found herself on the losing end with him... Clearly, she had no desire to discuss that matter further. Perhaps later. He was concerned. It was possible that she had a friend, or even a boyfriend, either of which might be good. But why, if she were content with her situation, was she acting so defensive, had she gotten so little sleep lately, did she carry the gun to the door when he knocked? Why was she acting so paranoid, if all were well? "No, I suppose it is not. But should you ever wish to make it my business, I would be willing..." "I do not wish to make it your business," she spoke evenly. He nodded. With that subject dealt with, he tried to move on. "You let me in, but I have no desire to take advantage of the fact. Do you want to begin?" She crossed the room towards him. She smiled wickedly then took out two bottles and opened them, handing him one. "Let's begin then." He nodded as she replied, took the bottle offered, and looked at it doubtfully. He knew well the effects liquor often had on his people, and though he had tried during his early days in the Army, he had never mastered it. Thus he simply held it until she should indicate a desire for him to partake of it. She smiled, amused with his hesitation and clanked her bottle against his, "time to play then," she said. She tilted the bottle straight in the air and began to drink though she never took her eyes off him. "And the game this time will be what?" She stopped drinking to look at him. He did have nerve, she would give him that. "You tell me. You always control these things." She turned then headed for the living room to sit down. Following her, he took the cue and began to talk, to tell of his objective outright. She could then do what she would with it, but there would be no question concerning his intent later on. "It has been a long time since we have talked. I can tell that you are not happy to see me, perhaps because you are angry at me?" The question in his voice was only slight, as it was more of a statement of fact. "So, please tell me what you are angry about, and what I can do about it. Then I can at least do something to make things...better between us for the work we are to do together." The smallest indication of surprise, or perhaps curiosity crossed her features before she replied, the emotion clear and taking control to express itself fully. She started carefully, not sure if she was actually breathing, her mind ramped. "I thought you cared," she began, "I thought you were above Them...at Section...enough that I feel, you should have told me the part I would play in your game. But you didn't. You took their orders to heart...and that's what I'm pissed about." She paused for a moment. "I thought we were closer than that." Eric listened quietly, simply listening, watching, not planning or attempting to execute any moves. When she finished he continued to ponder it for a moment, sitting very still, thinking it through. "They convinced me, then, that the authenticity of your reaction was a necessity. I was a fool to believe them, and a coward to obey them. My judgment was clouded by fear for my daughter. You are right to be angry with me, and I do not expect to be able to pay for my wrongdoing. I would like, however, to do what I may." She watched him through the speech, her surprise becoming more evident. Did she expect him to defend himself? Certainly his pride had asked him to, but what good would it do? What could he win? No, better to swallow his pride and hope to mend relations between them to whatever extent possible. Why didn't he defend himself? She was put on edge more by his apparent need to pacify her. Was it a trap? Another way to gain her confidence? Or was she just crazy paranoid again and need to relax a bit? She took another sip of her beer. Ok, he was willing to deal apparently. What would he do? "And what would that be?" He had to smile a little at that. Make him work for it, she would, eh? He wasn't surprised, as, for all intents and purposes he deserved worse. He had not, however, planned for this contingency. "Give me a moment, please." He sat and pondered for a moment. She sat quietly as Kihn had apparently not prepared for her to take him up on his offer, if his offer had even been prepared before hand. "All right. I will be honest with you as I have with no other. Ask me any question. I have nothing to lose by telling the full truth, and nothing to gain by holding any thing back. " Another pause, as he thought & waited for her judgement, but he then determined to begin the telling by volunteering a little more, initially. "I may, in fact, have much to gain by telling the truth. I have kept myself alive, till now, in the hope that I may yet gain some of it." She sighed, looking down at the floor. She wasn't sure how to handle this. Truth? What was that anymore? One could simply twist and distort the most blatant of lies and in the right medium pass it off as the truth. How many times had that happened to her? She would always just recover when another belief was betrayed. Why should she expect anything different? And with knowing that...what did it matter? It was a small limb to step out on if she opened herself, showed once again, the vulnerability she tried so hard to keep hidden. But it was a limb, it was something in the presence of nothing. "I want to know...mostly..." she took a sip of her beer, "if you ever cared. About me...or what would happen to me." Good question. She was willing to deal. He relaxed a little, careful to do this right, but more careful to suppress the training that told him to make it a smooth half-truth-lie that would gain desired results while protecting him. "At first I liked you, wanted to know you, but little more then. Perhaps with absence love grows fonder? I care now. I began to care..." He had never really thought this out. When had he begun to love her? When was the first time that he saw her as someone to know and be known by, to enjoy the presence of, to care for and help for their sake rather than just as a means to securing her allegiance? When had she become more important to him than what she could do for him? "...after the mission to hit the yacht. I needed something to look forward to, and finding nothing, I looked forward to finding something." "My daughter was gone, and I could never see her again. The Snowy Owl, my spirit guide, left me. I realized a little later that making up with you was the only something left." He breathed, automatically fearing that he had gone too far, but reminded himself of what was at stake, that he had much more to gain than to lose. He determined to open up to her, to go into this relationship, like he often would into a hunt or a mission. The hunter must give up thought of all else, give up discomfort, pain, boredom, desire, and simply focus on the target. In this case, the target was honesty, pure honesty, whatever the cost. She was amazed at his honesty. "You say these things," she looked to him, "I gave you everything - even when every part of me screamed not to - I did. Because I did what I thought was right." Her face twisted in confusion, "I just...don't see why you couldn't do the same...or why you thought we could know each other without your being able to resist them..." "They would have killed me if I had not complied. I complied in the hope that I might live to talk to you. I believe even then I cared, though my fear for my daughter overrode all else." He breathed, reminded himself not to get defensive, sighed, and continued. "I do not justify my actions, and I do not expect anything from you, but a chance. This you have already given, and I appreciate it. No, I do not expect, nor wish to be done with it, and I know it will be hard. I am prepared, however, to do whatever it will take. Are you asking for my explanation, since I have no justification? I do not think it will make any difference to you." "It won't," she said quietly. She already knew what she needed to know. Almost. "Was it Madeline that gave you all the information on me and the rest of the team?" "To a great extent. She told me what she judged to be vital elements of your psychology - the psych records of you all � to allow you to be compromised. She also gave me provisionary level two access to all the personnel files, including yours, and encouraged me to learn the rest by..." he frowned, uncomfortable with the terms used at the time, but again, honesty was the name of the game. "She wanted me to get close to you, probably sexually." She closed her eyes momentarily. She had always suspected it was Madeline who gave Kihn all the information about how they operated, their weaknesses, so they could be exploited and tortured. But to hear it, to actually have it confirmed... She got up suddenly, holding her beer bottle and grabbing his, "it doesn't matter," she mumbled to him before she walked into the kitchen. She was tired of the game, she didn't want to play anymore. The effort was exhausting in itself. She then grabbed a water bottle from the fridge, the sweatshirt from the chair, and walked back as Kihn watched her carefully. She tossed the water bottle at him, "stay?" she asked quietly. She had no idea where the SIA had stationed him though she doubted it was anywhere near. He nodded briefly. "Good," she said returning to the other couch, "I can sleep then." At least with someone there, someone else to watch, to guard, she could maybe get some sleep. She put the sweatshirt on, tossed the remote at him, and stretched out on the large couch. "Don't ever do that again," she mumbled quietly before closing her eyes. She did not care what he did to amuse himself if he did anything. As long as he stayed, and she was positive, that he would, that was all that mattered she thought. Return |
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