| "Sans Sens (Without Meaning)" | ||
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Sunday 26th May 2008 19.00hrs The curtain whisked back, and Gray walked in and stood looking down at her. "How are you doing?" She moved the icepack on her shoulder where it had slipped down and nodded, "I'll live, but I think the bike is no more." "It's not important, you can get another bike, but people are much harder to replace." He was serious, and she realised that he was concerned for her, which was new, no-one had cared that much about them at Section; there they had been used, abused and destroyed almost on a whim. She was silent, considering what to say to him, how to respond. Nothing had prepared her for the revelation; she hadn't even considered that the SIA could even be that different to Section. Despite all their promises, she thought they were the same sort of agency, using operatives/agents to take the chances the risks that no `free' person would. It was making her reconsider her views of the world she now found herself in. "I spoke to the medical staff; they would prefer to keep an eye on you overnight following the accident. So they have prepared a cubicle for you." His voice was calm, "I know you would prefer to go home, but please consider their advice." He was so reasonable, as always it didn't leave her much room to put up an argument against the suggestion, so she just nodded. "But they didn't say you couldn't go out to dinner, so how about I give you 45 mins to get ready?" he smiled, "and before you say you have nothing to wear, the clothing unit downstairs has a selection of outfits in your size." She acquiesced, too surprised to say no, "Thank you." "My pleasure," he turned to walk away, pausing at the curtain, "I'll meet you in the lounge." She stayed where she was, before slowly getting to her feet. She looked in the mirror, and removed the ice-pack from her shoulder; it was inevitably turning a darker shade of blue, and nicely complemented the redness of the road burns on the rest of her left side. Sighing, she made her way past the receptionist, to the lifts. She pressed the button and waited for the lift to arrive, wondering where Gray was taking her and why. When the lift arrived, she got in and pressed the button for the 8th floor, puzzling over the contradictions that this place was, she couldn't help her suspicions but she was also beginning to feel that there was no substance to them. She hadn't been to the clothing room before; the leisure clothes that had been available from the gym/exercise areas had always been sufficient. She opened the door and switched the lights on, displayed on racks and on shelves was a vast range of clothes in every colour and size, some of it expensive by the labels. She walked slowly around the room, trying to identify something that would not stand out wherever Grey was taking her; she was kicking herself for not asking him what sort of place that he was taking her to. In the end she settled on a grey sheath dress, with a darker grey jacket and shoes. It would pass in a classy restaurant, but not look out of place somewhere cheaper. One of the cupboards was filled with make-up, and she put on the minimum that her outfit called for, wincing slightly at the movement required to put on the mascara. Gray was waiting for her in the lounge, at first she thought she was late, but he got in first, "I'm early." He smiled, slightly nervously, "are you ready?" She was stunned but managed to nod. The car was waiting for them at the bottom, along with a driver, so they got in the back. Gray was keeping the conversation going, but giving her a chance to contribute to the small talk, asking her about the bike and how she was finding life in New Jersey. The restaurant was expensive looking, and he was apparently well known there. The manager took them to their table, and gave them the menus, she read through hers twice, noting the prices, which were exorbitant. She still didn't know why he was doing this, especially now, but she kept her questions and needs to herself, though she kept looking over the menu at him slightly puzzled by his actions. She decided on a salad as a starter, followed by chicken al la fortuna, while he had scallops followed by steak. Gray kept the talk away from the mission on Friday, which was fine with her; she didn't want to discuss her part in it either. Over coffee the conversation turned to the bike accident, Gray asked her to go through all the details, she sighed heavily, stirred her herbal tea and told him of the SUV and the partial plate number she had made on it. He asked her what she was planning to do with it, and she hesitated, realising that she hadn't made up her mind, but now she knew what to do. "I think it was an accident, just an accident." She looked over at him, "I got away lightly, but if you think I should pass on the details to the cops.." she allowed him to interrupt. He considered it for a moment, then shrugged, "I think you are right, it was an accident." He paused, "but the choice is yours." She nodded, "Then just drop it. Though I am sorry about the bike, I loved having that, it made me feel free." To her embarrassment, she felt her eyes fill up, though she blinked hard to force the moisture away; to have emotions for something as inanimate as a bike was just plain stupid. Gray smiled, "Pick out another, your choice this time. Just let me know and we will arrange for one to be delivered to you." "Are you serious?" she asked, disbelief clear in her voice. "Quite serious," he said, "As you were told from the beginning, this is not Section, and we want you to be effective. You won't be unless you are happy, and we need you to be both." She smiled, for the first time in a long time, she was beginning to feel positive about the changes in her situation and accident or not, it appeared that some good was going to come out of it. The car was waiting outside, but after sitting for so long, she was stiff and it was painful to move, but she wasn't going to let anyone see that, so instead she walked as gracefully as she could to the exit, holding the pain inside of her. 22.30hrs The drive back didn't take long, and then Gray escorted her upstairs to the 11th Floor, where a cubicle had been readied for her. "I'll leave you here, and see you in the morning, before someone takes you home." She nodded, not really taking in what he said, just looking at the bed longing for a good night's sleep. When Gray left, she stripped off the clothes, had a shower, wincing at the pain the water caused on the burns and road rash. She carefully dried herself off, patting her body dry rather than rubbing and then got into the bed, more in hope than anticipation. Shortly afterwards, one of the med staff came in and asked if she was ok, whether she needed anything, but she just shook her head, wanting to be left alone. They showed her the bell to ring if she needed anything, and then shut the door behind them leaving her to the quietness. It was strange, unfamiliar and when combined with the affects of the accident, she spent another restless night, finally falling asleep just before dawn. She cursed roundly the aide that woke her up less than an hour later, bringing her breakfast, but knew that the blame wasn't theirs, but hers; she apologised to the aide, but it was without depth or meaning. Monday 27th May 2008 08.15hrs She ate the meal, eagerly, sleep she might have found disturbed, but not her appetite. She finished off everything on the tray and could have had more, had it been available. An hour later and one of the docs had examined her shoulder before she was cleared to go, he looked at the dark circles under her eyes, but she stared back at him, challenging him to ask; he backed down. The insomnia would go, she just needed time to work through it, and being prodded and poked by the medical staff wouldn't help. She got dressed in clean clothes, wincing at the pain caused by moving her shoulder. The ice pack had helped and in a few days it would be as good as new, but for the moment it was hell. The road rash was also more painful this morning, but again in a couple of days, it would be gone, she would just have to be patient. Down on the 9th Floor, Gray was in his office. She tapped on the door, and he turned to greet her, "Come on in." he picked up some brochures and handed them over to her, "some reading matter for you. Make a decision, let me know and I will make the arrangements." She looked down at what he had given her, BMW, Harley, Yamaha, a whole range of bike brochures. "Did you sleep well?" he asked. Automatically she nodded, "Fine thanks, though I would rather spend tonight at home." "That should be no problem, I will arrange for a car to take you home, if you want to wait in the lounge." She turned to leave and then hesitated, asking, "The mission didn't go well for the SIA, did it?" Gray caught her meaning immediately, "No, it didn't and we can't afford another failure." She nodded, knowing that the future was still uncertain for them. If the SIA was closed down, the agents who could be redeployed would be, but for the ex-section operatives there was no such hope. She stood staring at the desk, not knowing how to respond, only knowing that these people had given her chance after chance, and if she could she would give them everything she had and more if it meant the success of the agency. "A car is waiting for you downstairs. I'll give you a call later to see if you have found something you like and then we can set up a trial." His voice was soft, almost warm. "Thanks." She said turning and walking away, he had given her much more than she was thanking him for. As she waited for the lift, she reflected on what had been said, or rather unsaid. For what Section had tried to do with manipulating and bullying, the SIA had gone a long way to success with honesty and openness. She felt a sense of loyalty, something she had never felt before, though she wasn't prepared to be open about it just in case it turned out to be another trick. Return |
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