8:15 pm
MOOD: disgusted, itchy
MUSIC: -in my head- Just a Man (Supertones)

We did some sump pump installation and roof-rearranging the other day, that was great work.

Then today we teamed up with this other group, actually a few other groups, and we sorted and shelved food for the South Jersey Food Bank. There I met Andrea, Eric, Laura, Isaac, and Kelly. Along with Roth and some migrant helpers, we sorted bins and arranged shelves, while Tom, Robbie, Nate and others put together crates. It looks like a pretty worthy ministry.

Mmmmm.. Those kids are so awesome... Brent (the kids' after school program leader) set up a "musical" for the kids, in the sanctuary, with the gethsemane music from "Jesus Christ Superstar," and someone acting Jesus' part, and these kids asked some of the tough questions, about the reason for grief and the meaning of the trinity.. these are 6- to 10-year-olds too!

I'll never forget the expression on little Samantha's face yesterday, when she was in free time, coloring, she drew a cross, and a sun, and then she asked me, after racking her brain, "Do you know how to draw God? I don't know how to draw God."

What else could i say, "i dunno!" That caught me completely broadside.

But then she went a decided, "I'll draw a lamb, will that be okay?"

Hehe, saved.

Lui was askin us all our ages, and we all had everybody guess, and somebody pointed out, Ty was the oldest in the room, at twenty-two years old. Then Xavier who was right next to Ty went in protest, "My mom's older than y'all here." We asked how old, he said "Twenty-three!" Yeesh. The kid is nine.

These kids have some pretty hard homework.. I was helpin Samantha (dude she is hyper!) do these math questions.. This one was, "I am a number less than 20 and my tens digit is the same as my ones digit." She has no comprehension of that type of thing! And these kids are learning lists of words for a spelling bee.. NO! You aren't supposed to learn words, you're supposed to learn phonics! My gosh, Taheem would have done so much better if he could grasp the concept of 'sounding it out': Friend = Fr + ie + n + d, and all that! Either the kids totally were not taught the concepts of phonics, i dunno, they were chronically bad spellers? :-/

I wish i could go on with these kids... Saul with his soccer, hehe (Saul pronounced as 2 syllables, a as in waffle, and ul sounds like in pool) ..adorable little Tita, she's so great, also Dominique was a hilarious kid, always cracking jokes; a bit of an attitude, but eh, they all were like that. :P

After the kids left, Roth Tyler, Steve and I, we met this guy.. he tried to sell us weed or something.. Tyler was like "ah, no, i haven't got anything," Steve was like "I'm all set, thanks," I was gonna say something like "I've already got a terminal debilitating addiction, thanks.." I didnt say it though.. I didnt really want to.. I wanted to pull him out of it but i'm a bit too powerless all by myself.

sigh..

... And these kids, they grow up in all this, in this barbed wire playyard surrounded by a decaying city..

God they're just kids!!

We had to leave them, of course, today was the last day. It was only the fourth day with them. They are not gonna remember us in a year from now, guaranteed.

I came to this city to change the lives of some kids. I wonder if i did. They tell you "oh they capture every bit of it, they cherish it and they take a bit of you with them."

Do they? I hope so. Maybe i inadvertantly taught somebody something. But i'll never know. ... It's so frustrating, it itches my mind.

hey, i still have Tita's fan...