my two lungs
my two eyes
my two lips
as i dismiss this
my two legs
my two arms
my two wrists
i make my hit list
my two hands
have turned to fists.
11 September 2001________ddg
VIAGRA FALLS~
BECAUSE YOU CHOSE
TO PIERCE THE SKY,
SCRAPING
WHAT WAS NOT YOURS,
YOU ASKED US
TO BELIEVE
THAT YOUR STEEL
WAS FIRM
AND PERMANENT,
TOO MANY STORIES,
HIGH ENOUGH
TO DIE HARD--
YOUR PHALLIC CATHEDRAL
STANDING ERECT,
BUT THEN -
A MOMENTARY LAPSE
OF BALANCE -
FLACID -
YOU COLLAPSED,
YOUR GREAT FEAT
DEFLATING,
YOU ROCKED
US THROUGH OUR SHOES,
BUCKLED UNDER
SUDDEN HEAT,
MELTED THE VELVET
FLESH THAT HELD
10,000 BREATHS,
AND WE ARE LEFT BREATHLESS,
SHOCKED AND SORROWED
TO OUR MARROW,
WINDOW TO THE WORLD
NOW SHALLOW
SHATTERED GLASS,
TRAGIC LITTLE TRACE
OF WHAT MATTERED,
FACES WE CANNOT PLACE.
14 September 2001_______ddg
i can tell
how it ends
now you wanna begin?
telling me
that you need me
to list my sins?
wanting me down
to beg on
my hands and knees?
so sure sir
thank you, sir
for letting me bleed.
wanna know
how it feels
to be under my skin?
wear my dress
and distress
in this mess i'm in?
put your fist
to this face
just one more time.
and you'll wish
that your mistress
had mercy in mind,
I KILLED KENNY..
YOU FUCKING BASTARD!!!
______________________________
~UNEXPECTING
go to the light now baby yeah
it's alright now baby yeah
if you wanna keep your feet
better you stop kicking me
grab a switch and boil water
such a bitching spoiled
daughter
such a disgrace to this town
try to face my demons down
doctor, it's inside of me
sucking the life out of me
it's not his love inside of me
get it the fuck out of me
my hair is 1986
and it's morning and i'm sick
no one sees me in my room
happy she is in my womb
doctor, it's inside of me
sucking the life out of me
get it the fuck out of me
get the fuck right out of me
then they let me see the file
she was real for a while
take my legs down off the rack
bleeding open broken back
now doctor give her back to me
i changed my mind now,
can't you see
i needed just to catch my
breath
i didn't want her put to death
in the mirror where i see
demons staring back at me
take away my choices then
take away my oxygen
take away my oxygen
______________________________
~chapter 5
tonight my arms
are heavy and sore
i don't believe
i can take anymore
scarlet ribbons
tie my wrists to the floor
one in the wings
and one out the door
one around my neck
to remind me to breathe
one tie that binds
me so i can't leave
he can't see me bleed
so i smear the screen
let it go too far
and soiled the clean
______________________________
~chapter 8
spent some summer
in a singular vision
long lost nights
end in no decision
he sees me
with permanent eyes
my deep dark truth
dropping my disguise
for a moment i was coated
in a sweet candy glaze
then the heat from the fire
made me meltdown in days
running low on storage space
for all of my lives
my last hope is backed up
in vast blank lines
the damage is endless
and less is still more
more time to suffer
and lie on the floor
even when you're left with
nothing-
you have nothing left to lose.
______________________________
~yes master
i'm a simple girl, you say
i need a hand to guide my way
i'd be good for you, you say
i'd be good for you, you say
unless you put me in a cage
expect me to act my age
i'll throw up my hands
and i'll make you pay
put me in a box
and watch me cut my locks
take me down to size
and tell me how your heart
stops
when i break down
you'll wish you never saw me
that i never said your name
you'll wish you only asked me
directions to get past me
2 times now you've lied to me
i think i see the number three
and it's heading
right for me
i broke right thru
and followed you
i know your every
single move
i'm breaking you in, too
i'm breaking you in, too
______________________________
~chapter 13
what am i looking for
in these pages?
what is it
i hope to find?
when you close
your eyes to the truth
you're effectively blind.
do i leave too much room
to read between the lines?
i get lost in the blank spaces
and they add up in time.
which words are the truth?
the ones you've said
or written?
the ones that i can prove?
or do i believe you
in the ways you have moved--
a shift in the focus
from us--
back to you.
