| 1700h
Mood: survivor's spirit Happiness of the day: Good weather Event of the week: 2 exams this week.
Did you read the earliest entries of this journal? I was 18, still in Singapore, still very optimistic and possibly very egotistic. I was just reading some of those entries last night, when I got bored of studying. Man, I sounded so cute then! Haha...I am indeed old now. I was talking about things like doing sit-ups. French fries. The love bite on the waitor's neck. Weird stuff....oh, and my dreams too. I would probably have forgotten them if I didn't write them down, but now I remember them again. Wow...those years of innocence, and relatively normal dreams. HAhaha...
It's interesting to see how I've grown, so far. Not just erm, mass-wise of course. Haha...I've become so much more open in this journal. When I first started this journal, I was still with WS. But not once did I mention him, not even our break up. Now, though I still don't say much, at least I'm willing to say that I'm depressed when I'm actually depressed. Willing to show more of those emotions that I didn't want to show then because I wanted this journal to be as light-hearted as possible. Oops, turns out I'm not as light-hearted a person as many may think. So boom, came the entries after I left Singapore, that talked about being lonely, feeling empty, feeling useless. I wasn't entirely a happy little tweety bird when I was 18, but no one would have been able to tell from those entries of mine. Interesting, isn't it? But of course, at 18, things were still more of less carefree, so probably while I was feeling sad sometimes, I probably wasn't really depressed or anything like that.
And I feel so happy for myself. I had those wonderful years of simple joy. I could really feel my happiness writing those entries, even as I read them now. I'm really contented with my life right now as well, but I don't rave as easily as I did then. Or maybe it's because things are just too routine now, for me to have anything I consider unique enough to talk about.
I'm waiting for something exciting to happen....
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