Lily, My One and Only
by: GoDdEsS oF dEaTh
song: smashing pumpkins
Let me start by saying I am perfectly sane. Despite what people say, despite what doctors conclude, I am in no way psychotic. I am simply a victim of something that even a Perfect Soldier like myself cannot escape: pure love.
Every night I sit outside her window. My Lily's window. I call her that because she is as perfect as the delicate white flower, and she belongs to me. She is beautiful, with alabaster skin, glimmering hair, and sparkling eyes. I could spout a million sonnets about her beauty. My Lily is a genius, along with being compassionate, giving, and understanding. She is, without a doubt, perfect in every way. This is why she is *my* Lily, my one and only...
I wait every night, anticipating her arrival at her room. My heart pounds in my chest with want and my whole body becomes light with my eagerness to see her. She is my whole existence.
{
I can hardly wait till I see her}
As she enters her room, I let the breath I had been holding slither out. My sweet Lily has arrived to let me worship her. As she tiredly disposes of her business suit of the day -- navy blue skirt and jacket, which is her favorite -- I admire her, because she is a complete goddess. Her breasts are small but tempting, her stomach is flat, and her legs are perfectly muscled. Ah...to touch her!
I often wish for her to look out at me. To smile and throw open her window, calling me to scale the wall so that we can be together. So that I can finally be with my Lily. My perfect, pure Lily....
{Silly, I know I'm silly
Cause I'm hanging in this tree
In the hopes that she will catch a glimpse of me}
She pulls the curtains shut, but they are thin, so I can see her silhouette gliding by every few minutes. I look through my binoculars, seeing flashes of pale skin through a slit between the curtains. Oh, to be with her tonight, or any night...I would gladly give my soul. Wouldn't any sane man in love do that?
I can't help but wonder if she remembers me...if she feels the same encompassing love that I do?
{And through her window shade
I watch her shadow move
I wonder if she...?}
I chide myself silently, smiling. How could I wonder such a thing, when the answer is obvious? Of course my beautiful, sweet Lily loves me! How could she not? One look into her eyes, the color of the Caribbean Sea, and I can see her pure, powerful love for me.
Many people have been gossiping on the news. I taped all of the reports about my Lily possibly having a relationship with some diplomat. Ha! He could never win the heart of my dedicated Lily. She loves me, and only me. I know this for a fact. How could she not love me as much as I adore her? No one seems to understand that she doesn't want him, except for me. Doesn't that make everyone else insane, but me perfectly normal?
{Lily, my one and only
Love is in my heart and in your eyes
Will she or won't she want him
No one knows for sure}
A thought pricks my mind. Just yesterday, a police officer came to my apartment. Odd, isn't it? Even stranger, I must confess, was that he asked me about my Lily.
Though I was confused about his visit at first, it slowly began to make sense. My worried, shy Lily sent this man to see if I loved her! She would be much too embarrassed to come herself, so she sent someone for her!
I told him how much I loved her, and commanded him to make sure he told her my exact words, so my love would reach and wrap around her, binding her to me, despite the physical distance between us. Our hearts are one, Lily and mine's. Now she would know that, too.
As you can see, it was very sane to tell him about my love.
{but an officer is knocking at my door}
Remembering the meeting with the police officer makes me euphoric. Soon, my Lily and I will be united. My breath comes faster with anticipation. Would it be so bad to surprise her now? I can see her gasping with surprise, and then embracing me lovingly. Then we would make love. My body trembles with leashed passion for my innocent, virginal Lily. It would be so beautiful, so *perfect*, with my Lily.
Lost in thought, I didn't realize she had paused by the window. Her shadow was still, as if it were a statue, instead of my energetic Lily.
Suddenly, the curtains are yanked out of the way, and my Lily is looking down at the tree I am crouching in. My breath catches sharply. Could she possibly...?
{And through her window shade
I watch her shadow move
I wonder if she could only see me?}
She doesn't let any reaction show. She must simply be looking at the scenery. But, oh, how I wished she would invite me in! I would be so happy, and I could make her life so wonderful. We could get married, have dozens of children, make love every day...
One kiss from her would make all of this waiting worth it. I've been watching her for years, pining for her. One sweet touch of her lush lips, and the time I've spent waiting wouldn't matter any more. She would look at me as if I were her whole world. The idea of her face looking up at mine with love makes my anticipation of our meeting escalate.
Oh, my Lily, how I want you...
{And when I'm with her I feel fine
If I could kiss her I wouldn't mind the time it took to find
My lily, my one and only
I can hardly wait till i see her}
So concentrated on my Lily was I that I didn't hear them coming. Those evil people in blue uniforms, who dragged me from my perch, away from my sweet love. I kicked and yelled and struggled, desperate to be here, near her. I cried her name, told her she was mine. As soon as I was released, I would kill these demons for taking me away from my love.
Then I looked up at the window of her room. She was standing in front of it, smiling sadly, with her hand pressed against the glass.
This is how I know you love me, my Lily. As you watched me being taken away, you felt the same horrible tear in your chest, the same desperation to be close to me again. My sweet Lily, I will soon by near you again. Any sane man would fight to be near you, my perfect love, my blooming lily, my Relena Dorlian.
{Oh. Lily, I know you love me
Cause as they're dragging me away
I swear I saw her raise her hand and wave goodbye.}