The Big Cat Fight Over Heero Yui by Elf
Standard disclaimers apply


"Heero." Heero Yui, slightly suicidal piolet of the Gundam Wing, turned to see Dorthey looking at him with her strange violet -blue eyes under her strange split eyebrows. She was attractive, Heero guessed if he wanted to be nice, but since being Heero, he wasn't.

He asked her, "What?"

She smiled seductively at him. Heero lifted an eyebrow and leaned against the wall. If he wasn't careful he would be late to class, if he cared. She said, "Hello Heero, you look very well today."

"Whatever," the suicidal piolet told her as he walked past.

She reached out and grabbed his arm. He looked down at her hand holding his arm. He told her, "Let me go before I'll kill you."

"You threaten Relena the same way, don't you?" she asked coyly.

Heero shook her off and said, "You are a very strange person." With that crafty closer he went to class, unaware that Relena Peacecraft was listening to them.

******

"Hey Heero," Duo Maxwell chirped as he stuck the eraser of his pencil into Heero's neck for the tenth time that day.

"Stop it Duo," Heero told him tersely as the pencil made another jab.

"I saw you talking to Dorothy. Boooyyy, Relena's going to be jealous," Duo taunted as he continued to attack his fellow piolet with the writing utensil.

"I said stop it, Duo," Heero threatened in his coldest voice as his comrade continued to poke him with the pencil.

A snore came from a few feet away. Heero looked over to see Wu Fy slumped over his desk, asleep as always as Trowa and Quatra talked. Duo poked him with the pencil to get his attention. Duo asked, "So, what's going on between you and Reiliana anyway?"

"Nothing," Heero told him. Why in the world would he care for Releana? She was a liability to him.

"Liar," Duo teased as he poked Heero with the pencil again.

"I told you to stop that," Heero told him sharply. Then he spun around, grabbed the pencil from Duo's fingertips, broke it in half, and tossed each half across the room.

"Damn it!" Duo cursed. Then he asked Heero, "What the hell did you do that for?"

"You were bothering me," Heero answered him truthfully.

"Well, I'm sorry, can't get the great Heero Yui's attention. Geez, what's up with this bull shit," Duo quipped in his most sarcastic voice.

"Duo, why do you use that language?" Quatra asked him, his innocent blue-green eyes wide and curious. Trowa leaned back in his chair and his light brown hair obscured one of his green eyes. Each of the Gundam piolets were different, but the same in many ways.

Wu Fy snored loudly, rolled in his chair and grumbled, "Stupid weaklings, Natauku and I have to protect you."

"That was just a little creepy," Duo said as the other Gundam piolet talked in his sleep.

"You just got to understand where Wu Fy's coming from," gentle Quatra tried to reason.

Duo tossed his long braid off his shoulder. Heero wondered why he dressed like a priest when he was called "The God of Death". Duo said, "Yeah, he's just a little wacked out right now."

"He's been under a lot of stress lately, give the guy a break, Duo," Trowa said as Quatra turned to him. Their conversation started up again, leaving Duo and Heero to talk. Heero was really looking forward to that.

Duo smiled his best happy-go-lucky smile and asked, "Hey, Heero, do you have your geometry homework done?"

"Yeah," Heero answered.

Duo asked sheepishly, "Can I copy it?"

Heero thought for a moment of not let him see it, but his sense of honor wouldn't let him leave a comrade stranded. He dug through his folder and produced the object that Duo desired. Duo smiled and said, "Thanks dude, that damned bitch Bagshaw might go on some giant yelling spaz attack again."

Heero said nothing as Duo began to copy the homework. At least he wasn't poking him in the back of the neck with a pencil anymore.

******

Relena felt slightly guilty about breaking into Dorthy's room, but the feeling evaporated when Relena saw all the photos of Heero posted all over the witch's bedroom. "No," Relena whispered as she ran her fingers over a photo of Duo and Heero standing together, Duo grinning his silly grin and Heero smirking slightly. Relena ran her fingers over Heero's handsome features, imaginary stroking that dark brown hair away from his lovely dark blue eyes.

Relena Peacecraft had fallen in love with Heero Yui as soon as she had taken off his helmet when she had found him on the beach. He had looked so peaceful at that moment, then he had woken up, his dark blue eyes snapping in defense. Then there was the moment when he had touched her face, wiped that tear away from her face. Her face occasionally tingled to this very day from his touch.

"Find something interesting, Miss Relena?" Dorothy asked from the doorway. Relena spun around to see the other girl smirking at her, her long, pale blond hair waving around her as she walked closer to Relena.

Relena froze and looked into Dorothy's cold blue eyes under those ugly eyebrows that needed to be shaved or severely plucked. "Why do you have all of these?" she asked Dorothy as she pointed to all the photos.

Dorothy chuckled and said, "Oh, Miss Reiliana, you don't see it do you?"

"See what?" Relena hissed, surprised in the anger in her tone of voice. But Relena was angry, this little witch was after Heero, her Heero, and with the fact that she was a blood relative of the Romafeller foundation, Relena suddenly hated her. Both Neun and Pagan had advised her to watch Dorothy carefully, but Relena, the stupid innocent that she was, thought that it was unneeded and that Dorothy was a good and trustworthy person.

"Why, Heero's going to be mine," Dorothy answered with a laugh.

"Over my dead body," Relena snapped. Heero was going to be hers, and not some little bitch's. Then she added at Dorothy's shocked exsperession, "Bitch."

"Ho," Dorothy cried out as she charged at Relena.

Relena ducked and grabbed the other girl's hair. Using Dorothy's own momentum, she flipped Dorothy to the ground in a pile of skirts and long hair. Dorothy stood up and hissed.

Relena gestured her closer and sneered, "Well, bring it on, bitch."

Dorothy screamed as she raked Relina's face with her fingernails. Relina brought up her hand to the stinging scratches and found blood. Relina looked up and said, "Oh, you're gonna pay for that." Then she threw a round house kick, sending Dorothy tumbling to the ground.

******

Heero and Duo were walking to their rooms after class. They heard a crash and Relina shouting, "You stupid bitch!" from Dorothy's bedroom.

Suddenly, a dozen possibilitys sprung to Duo's demented mind. Images of Relina and Dorthy duking it out half nude formed in his head. "Hey Heero, you wanna see what's happening in there?" he asked his friend.

Heero turned his dark, icy gaze to the closed door. He shook his head and said, "It wouldn't be good. Besides, a fight might change Relina for the better."

"I know what kind of change you're thinking about, buddy," Duo told him with a nudge.

Heero shrugged and said, "Come on Duo, you want to get that homework done so you can work on the new adjustments on your Gundam, right?"

Duo smiled, the catfight forgoten. The images of Relina and Dorothy duking it out half naked were replaced with Deathscythe Hell ripping into some moble dolls. "Oh yeah, I'm there, buddy," Duo replied as they went off.

******

"I'll get you, Relina Peacecraft!" Dorthy shouted as she ran to the armery. Relina went to the opposite path, going where they kept the Gundams. She entered the warehouse and looked up at Wing 00. No one pioleted this Gundam, right? She climbed up to the cockpit and turned on the systems.

The Gundam came to life, and some sort of change came over Relina. Dorothy was her enimey and so was the Rockerfeller foundation, and they wanted Heero. They must be distroyed.

******

Treis smiled slightly as an Aries unit was disintigrated by one of the Gundams. He kept smiling as the Gundam took out several moble dolls and then turned its guns to the Rockefeller Foundation Headquarters. In a matter of moments, the building was nothing but a pile of smoking rubble.

Tries twerled the rose in his fingers and tossed it on the pile of rubble that had been his comrads and enimeys.

******

"Did Quatra go insane and start killing people again?" Duo asked as he and Heero watched the carnage on the news. The Romeafeller foundation had been distroied by Gundam Wing 00. Quatra pioleted 00. Heero knew that wasn't Quatra doing this carnage because Quatra was in the next room, watching the same broadcast.

Neun ran into their room and asked, "Have you boys seen Relina?"

"No pretty lady, we haven't seen Miss Relina," Duo answered her, instantly flirting with Nuen. Heero simply shook his head.

"Damn it!" Nuen shouted as she punched the doorway. With that, she ran out of their room. Heero turned to the screen to find out that the Gundam had disapeared. He walked over and turned off the vidscreen.

Duo asked, "Now what, are we out of a job?"

Heero was quiet and thoughtful for a moment. Actually, he hadn't been thinking of that, he had worrying about Relina.

"Heero." Heero turned to see a battle ravaged Relina standing in the doorway. She had claw marks marring her porcelain features. Heero wanted to blow whatever did that to her to Hell.

"What did that to you?" Heero asked as he indicated the marks on her face.

She scowled and answered, "It doesn't matter." With that, she strode boldly over to him. Heero was stunned, he didn't know what to do or say. She placed her hand on his chest and then, before Heero knew what was happening, she kissed him.

Duo was laughing in the back ground, but Heero wasn't paying any attention to that. Instead, he kissed her back, feeling his humanity returning.

She pulled away and looked him in the eyes.

******

Duo was chuckling as Relina pulled away from Heero. For a moment, he thought the two were about to go at it on the floor. He watched with great interest as Relina told him, "You're right."

"I am?" Heero asked in disbelief and confusion.

"Yes, Heero Yui, you are right, and I just now saw that," she answered him.

Duo burst out laughing. The great Heero Yui was taken down by a pacifist. He said, "Oh man, this is all too great."

"Go away, Duo," Relina told him, stepping away from Heero long enough to push him out of the room. Then, she slammed the door in his face. Duo burst into more laughing as he walked away.

He ran into Trowa and the other piolet asked, "Where's Heero?"

Duo just laughed and walked away. He wondered what state of undress that Trowa would find the lovebirds. Then he burst out into laughter as he realized that Relina was the one who had piloted Zero.

"Oh man, this is just some weird shit," he told himself as he walked down the hall and to tell the lovely Neun that Relina was now making out with a Gundam piolet. Duo just laughed even harder at that.

*******

The End

*******

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