The exception that proves the rule.
Hey, this is Shevek(As far as you know). If you think I'm funny, that's great. If you don't, well, I don't really care. You'll notice I'm not like your normal "ken doll" webmasters. Not quite what your used to, perhaps. Not a tidy picture, is it? Well, maybe im not a "GQ model" or a "hunk", or even "presentable". Maybe I'm not "pleasing to the eye", maybe im not "witty". I'm not "polished" or "prepared". I have nothing "interesting to say". I guess I dont "play the game". I don't "conform". I have a "bad attitude". I "eat excessively". I don't "wear pants while driving". People say I "scare small children". I'm not one of those people who "owns a toothbrush". I don't "eat with silverware". I "ramble on incoherently for hours on end". I'm not "smart", or even "average". I have an "obnoxious personality". I don't believe in "taking showers". You see, people have set a stereotype on us webmasters, but I'm not like them, they all have their "organized hairdo's". They "wear a shirt". They all seem to "see natural light at least once a week". So I guess I just dont "fit the mold", and if that's the case then I'll just step back and I'm sure John and Jane Doe can enjoy the endless parade of commentators who don't "make people queasy". Well, maybe I'm not "the norm", I'm not "camera friendly", I don't "wear clothes that fit me", I'm not a "heart breaker", I havent "had sex with a woman", I don't know "how that works", I guess I don't "fall in line", I'm not "hygenic", I "lack style", I have no "charisma" or "self esteem", when I sleep I "sweat profusly". But, I guess the powers that be will keep me online until John and Jane Q. Surfer decide to change to a website who's webmaster is more "well bred"...thanks, that's all I have to say.
Name: Shevek Danger McKee
DOB: 8/20/84
Sex: I believe in abstinence(And yes, I do it voluntarily)
Occupation: Work...Guy at Turn-Style Consignment Stores
Income: Whatever I finds, I keeps.
Height: Tall as a 6-foot tree.
Weight: like 175-180 lb.
Alias: Shev-vek, Shev, Shev-Boy-R-Dee, Checkslavek, Check, Negative Dave.
Hobbies: Internet; Theatre; Singing with ABC; Laughing at all the kids who weren't "cool" enough to make the chess team; Handwriting my resume(I find a handwritten resume is more personal).
Education: School? Why, I never had much in the way of book larnin' and such.
Turn-On's: Hot chicks in fast cars. Crazy Girls. Obsession. Talking about yourself in first person. When girls literally push my buttons. Makin' bacon on the beach(Literally of course).
Turn-Off's: Light-switches in the 'off' position. Ugly chicks in slow cars. Girls who are actually clinically insane. Obsession. Shevek doesn't like when people Talk about themselfs in third person. When girls figuratively push my buttons. Woody Allen. Fat chicks in tight clothes(I just don't wanna see that). The Warner Brothers Network. The Parkers. People who've known me for years and still can't pronounce my name. Space-Time Continuem episodes of Star Trek.
Plan(s) for the future: Start a chicken noodle soup business; Jump to conclusions mat; Go to texas, become Karate fighting Texas ranger...TBC.
Umm....I'm bored, I'm done with this for now
� 2000 S&A Productions