Disclaimer: Buffy and cohorts belong to Joss W. and fiends (including the infamous WB); Grace, RevSam and the seaquest addict appear by gracious consent. (if you can consider threatening the author with dire bodily harm if they weren't included as gracious. ::dragon scowls at cohorts in crime -- er -- lurk)
Spoilers: Current season thru 11/30/00.
Rating: PG-14.
With all due respect <g> to BtVS's creators, dragon presents the next lurk ---
Interlewd with a Vampire
© 1999, dragon
It was a dark and stormy night.
"That's silly." Thunder crack. Jump. "OK. Maybe not that silly." Grace looked out the window of her New Orleans flat. She frowned. OK. Thunder out of a clear sky??
Fold. "Hi!"
Grace jumped again. She whirled to face dragon and frowned at her. "Could I have that dozen or so years back, please?"
dragon grinned and laughed. "Somewhere along the line. Thunderstorm?"
"No. Not so's you'd notice." She gave dragon a speculative look. Somehow, she didn't look like a mischievous lurker. "So, what's up?"
"I'm not sure. Have you been having -- odd happenings?"
"Define odd."
"Odd."
Grace gave her a look. "How odd?" she tried again.
"Oh, middlin'."
Grace gave up and sat down, pflump, on her couch. She got up again immediately, having neglected to notice the cat already in residence who complained about having been sat upon. "Oh! Sorry! I didn't mean it, honest," Grace apologized while hugging said cat and making certain it was alright. The cat didn't know whether to stay with the ruffled dignity schtick or succumb to being paid attention to. The latter won out with a rumbling purr.
Having made much of the ruffled feline and placed it on the couch and sat down without sitting on the cat, this time, Grace looked at dragon again. dragon was looking a little ruffled. "So, give."
"Well -- I dunno. It's just -- well -- someone's been in the lair."
"Rayden."
"Nope. He's never that quiet. And there's no new electroplating," she added with a laugh. "And it isn't his daughter, 'cause we've settled out that part of the story, even if it hasn't been written down yet. And it -- well, I know all the visitors to the lair, I think. And it ain't the seaQuest addict playing games. I'm beginning to suspect I'm being lurked."
Grace's mouth dropped open at the thought. She closed it again before any flies took a fancy to the interior. "But -- but -- but --"
"Yeah."
Silence. Thunder.
"Soooo -- whadda we do about it?"
"Lurk 'em back. I have my suspicions. The fan fic fairies have -- er -- reported -- "
"Reported????" Grace sounded disbelieving.
"Ok, so I coerced the little sods. Godiva chocolate and pizza, not necessarily together, will coerce almost anything! Anyway, they said there have been sightings of a very, very blonde type in a black trench coat, or long rider's style coat, depending on your angle of view. Ring any bells?"
Grace rummaged through her incredible store of series IDs and nodded slowly. "Vampire."
"Yep. I'm tempted to leave garlic bread in mouse traps all over his home."
Grace tried to stop the giggles, snorted slightly and gave in. "Oh, yeah. Who else is coming?"
"Who else? Tes is staying home with the kids. They had fun, but it is so hard to keep track of them. I guess that leaves the trusty RevSam, you and the seaquest addict, lurkers with experience -- come to think of it, not so much experience this time, ok?"
Grace gave her that innocent ::blink, blink:: look. It failed miserably, but she tried.
Fold. The cat, intent on some more attention, was disappointed in suddenly having warm cushions, but no human.
In the environs of Sunnydale's college campus, it was a dark and stormy night as the lurkers folded in, in search of one blond vampire. dragon had, of course, neglected to remember that RevSam reverted to her praahr form in vr and that this, coupled with the demon hunters on campus, might just make life a little more interesting than even finding Spike awake could. As luck would have it, Agent Riley and his crew were -- ahem -- lurking elsewhere.
All participants shouldered their water guns, which dragon had assured Grace were de rigeur when lurking, and went lurking -- ah -- looking for various members of the scooby gang. Grace, a little more familiar with the terrain than the others, led the way.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"Ssshhhhh!" Grace shushed as they attempted to discreetly find Buffy and Willow's room in the dorm. Avoiding co-eds was not easy, the halls seeming to be littered with them at this hour. They arrived at the doorway. dragon and Grace stood guard, RevSam tucked an envelope under the door and the seaQuest addict set up the silly string booby trap. Anyone approaching from the outside was fine unless someone inside opened the door.
"Done!" the seaQuest addict whispered and the quartet moved on, water guns at the ready.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Spike was pissed. Majorly pissed. Pissed to the point of steaming in the dark. Unfortunately, any attempt to alleviate the annoyance level by leveling something was certain to give him that cranium split open like a melon feeling. He wasn't certain whether he wanted to roar or cry. Dammit. Why him? It was all Buffy's fault. Well, maybe he couldn't deal with her, but -- but nothing. He was effectively neutered. He might as well go sit in the sun. He was also not in the lair with Harmony.
"I thought you said you knew where to find him," dragon hissed.
"I said I knew where the lair was. Didn't say anything about knowing whether they were home or not."
"Oh. OK." dragon checked to see if the coast was clear; Harmony was not in sight. dragon tiptoed over to the cluttered vanity the young vampire was using and set a gaily wrapped package on the only clear space. There was a note attached to it. "Artificial Intelligence. Enjoy!" dragon rejoined her cohorts as the seaQuest addict finished setting up the video camera to capture Harmony's reaction when she opened the box. It should be impressive.
"Where to next?"
dragon consulted her list. Willow. She smiled, produced a large box from her back pack, and a really wicked grin.
The seaQuest addict looked at the grin and ducked behind RevSam. She peered out from behind the fuzzy marsupialoid. "OK. What's in the box?" she asked suspiciously.
"Think leather," dragon answered with a grin.
The seaQuest addict's eyes got big and round. "Willow Vamp," she interpreted with a laugh. Oh, my. And just how were they going to get her to put it on? "Uh, mom. We already booby-trapped the room."
dragon gave her a look. Fold. Fold. Inside Willow's room. She deposited the box on the bed. It had a note attached. "Wear me." Hey, it was worth a try. And just what would Riley think when he saw the not so little red head??? Voices. (Not that unusual in a dorm, of course.)
Grace recognized the Slayer and friend's tones. "Out!"
Fold.
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