The Turnaround.
By Amanda Jay Clark.

Loneliness, you are a killer,
Why are you being so unkind?
What did I do to deserve your torture?
Why are you driving me out of my mind?
How can you surround me with so much darkness?
When can I come out into the light?
All questions without any answers.
And I’m too tired to continue the fight.

Depression, you’re driving me crazy.
Destroying every ambition, and goal.
Eating me alive without any mercy,
Mind, heart, body, and soul.
Surrounded by a thick fog of misery,
No analgesic can reach the pain.
There’s a famous saying, "Nothing to lose,"
For me, it’s more, "Nothing to gain."

Heartache, you’re my constant companion.
Like a shadow, you follow me round.
I try so hard to hide, or to lose you,
But nothing stops me from being found.
Behind the masquerade of a false smile,
I pretend that solitude is my friend.
That desperation is my sunshine,
That I’m at the beginning, not at the end.

Death would be a welcome visitor.
Oh God! How low can I fall?
I look for the light at the end of the tunnel,
But I can’t see the brightness at all.
I think it’s too late to turn things around,
It’s over. All hope is gone.
I’m gonna surrender, give in to despair.
What’s the point of carrying on!

Hey! Stop! Wait a Goddamn minute!
This is me, not some sad little fool!
I can beat these feelings of sorrow,
Cos I’m as stubborn as a mule.
Come on then, lay it all on me.
Give me your absolute worst.
I can take it. I’m strong. I am woman.
And I refuse to live as cursed.

I’m taking back control of my life.
Making good all the things that are bad.
From now on, it’s smiles instead of frowns,
As happy replaces the sad.
No more thunderclouds hanging over me.
Anything other than blue skies, are banned.
Evil will not find me any more,
Now that I’m taking a powerful stand.

I throwing out my security blanket.
I’m on the up, instead of downward sliding.
I’m facing me demons out in the open,
Instead of running away and hiding.
Suffering and grief are the losers now.
And as my courage and spirit expands,
I’m able to do things like never before,
As I grab life firmly in both of my hands.

No more over-eating for comfort.
I’m gonna lose all the excess weight.
Get my body like that of a Goddess,
And find me a red-hot man to date.
I’ll use powders, and creams, and potions,
To be rid of every worry line, and wrinkle.
The dullness, and bags from under my eyes,
I’ll replace with a sparkle, and twinkle.

No more thinking that I am not good enough.
From now on, I’m as good as the rest.
In fact, I’m a ten, I’m a raver,
Known as the best of the best!
Okay, that’s a slight exaggeration.
But I’m not as low as I always thought.
Through hard work, I’m a six, or a seven.
I used to score well below naught.

So, look out world, I am coming.
I’m turning my life all around.
Wives, lock your husbands in the bedroom.
Mothers, lock your sons underground.
Cos I’m hunting, and I’m prowling.
On the lookout for tempting prey.
Someone who will wine and dine me,
And then want his wicked way.

He may not be the man of my dreams,
(Cos the man of my dreams, isn’t free,)
But the rest of the male population,
Will be easy picking’s for me.
I’ll take that one, and him, and his brother,
And that shy looking one over there.
And the reluctant one who pretends not to see me,
I’ll take him home as a spare.

So, now who’s depressed and lonely?
Not me. I’ve got more than I can handle.
I’m working overtime just to keep up,
And burning both ends of the candle.
I love life. Well, it is for the living.
I embrace it without fear, or regret.
What was I sad about anyway?
God knows! Who cares! I forget!

Author of Rhyme "N" Reason.

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