Sailor Moon Episode Thirty-Eight
Fractious Friends
- Sailor Mars: Give up, Sailor Moon! We've got you nailed!
- Sailor Moon: Ooh, you're such a bigmouth, Mars, but talk's not action.
- Sailor Mars: You'll get action, and then, we'll see your big mouth whining, as usual.
- Sailor Jupiter: Give us the wand!
- Sailor Venus: Don't make us come and get it.
- Sailor Mercury: It's over, Sailor Moon. Don't be stubborn.
- Sailor Mars: What are you waiting for? We're not gonna wait here all night, you know? MARS FIRE IGNITE! Guess I overdid it.
- Sailor Jupiter: Smooth move, ya pyro! You nearly melted my boots!
- Sailor Mars: Oops.
- Queen Beryl: Hmm... where's all this strange energy coming from?
- Malachite: I think I know, my queen. There's friction between Sailor Moon and the other Sailor Scouts. The Imperium Silver Crystal must be reacting to it.
- Queen Beryl: Friction?
- Malachite: That's what my source tells me. Ninjana, give us your latest report.
- Ninjana: Yes, master.
- Queen Beryl: Let's hope she's more reliable than the others.
- Malachite: She's the very best, your majesty. She's been watching the Scouts for me. Tell us what you've got, Ninjana.
- Ninjana: Here.
- Queen Beryl: So what's this?
- Ninjana: Take a look.
- Queen Beryl: Hmm...
- Ninjana: The Sailor Scouts are teaming up against Sailor Moon... all four of 'em. I think they want to kick her out and keep the crystal for themselves; choose a new leader.
- Queen Beryl: Really? Or it could be some very clever trick. It sure looks real, but it could be a trap. Check it out some more before we make a move.
- Malachite: Ninjana doesn't make mistakes.
- Queen Beryl: You question my orders?
- Malachite: You heard the queen.
- Ninjana: I'll be in touch.
- Ninjana: Nice. Perfect for my little black dress.
- Molly: WHO ARE YOU?!
- Ninjana: No one you wanna mess with.
- Molly: AAAAH!
- Mrs. Baker: Molly, call the police!
- Ninjana: Nobody's going anywhere.
- Sailor Moon: Career's over, creep!
- Molly: It's Sailor Moon!
- Sailor Moon: I am Sailor Moon, Champion of Justice!
- Ninjana: Ooh, I'm trembling.
- Sailor Mars: Sailor Moon, could we please have a word with you?
- Sailor Moon: Sailor Mars, can't you see I'm busy here?
- Sailor Mars: We're supposed to fight as one, remember?
- Sailor Moon: I AM one! OOH!
- Sailor Jupiter: Leadership's gone to your head.
- Sailor Venus: Prima donna.
- Sailor Moon: OOOOH!
- Sailor Mercury: Maybe we should settle all of this after we take care of the burglar.
- Sailor Mars: No way! This has been going on too long!
- Sailor Moon: This is mutiny! You can't do this to me!
- Sailor Mercury: Looks like we just did.
- Sailor Mars: We're sick of following a dingbat.
- Sailor Moon: Dingbat?! Oh, a hothead who burns off people's feet is better than that? OH!
- Sailor Mars: What's a paparazzi doing here?!
- Nancy Vargas: Wow, what a scoop. The Sailor Scouts squabbling like a bunch of seagulls. This'll make the front page for sure!
- Sailor Moon: Hey! Enough already!
- Sailor Venus: Who do you think you are coming in here and snapping all those pictures, and how did you even know we were here anyway?!
- Nancy Vargas: That's a secret. So, there any truth to the buzz you guys are Splitsville? Sailor Moon?
- Sailor Moon: Oh, I know. You're from one of those shows with the hidden cameras, right? My friends are playing a joke, right? Hoping I'll make a total goof of myself. Ha ha ha. Right, guys?
- Nancy Vargas: Is it true or not? Come on. Here's your chance to dish up the dirt on the REAL Sailor Moon. Hey, we'll pay big bucks if we get the exclusive.
- Sailor Venus: That's it. I'm outta here.
- Sailor Mars: Yeah, no comment.
- Nancy Vargas: Uh? Come on, guys. Somebody's gotta have SOME serious dirt on her. Huh?
- Sailor Moon: Ooh, I hope they don't spill.
- Molly: Uh, Sailor Moon. Yoo hoo. Could you help us down?
- Sailor Moon: Oh. Right. Ha ha. Oh, sorry, guys. I-I spaced out there, Moll. Ha ha.
- Artemis: Something weird about that reporter.
- Luna: Yes. Better keep an eye on her.
- Molly: Good thing Sailor Moon showed up when she did, or that burglar could've cleaned us out.
- Serena: Hmm. Must've be totally scary.
- Molly: Yeah, but tell you something scarier: the Sailor Scouts are talking about splitting up.
- Serena: Huh? Oh, for real? Oh, no. You must've got it wrong. Now, why would they wanna split up when they got such a... a... a... a totally cool leader like Sailor Moon?
- Molly: She's spacey.
- Serena: Spacey?
- Nancy Vargas: Hello.
- Serena: Oh! Oh!
- Molly: What's happening?!
- Nancy Vargas: Nancy Vargas, Daily Surprise. I couldn't help overhearing. I heard you talking about the Sailor Scouts. I'm looking for the latest buzz.
- Serena: No... comment. Ha ha ha.
- Nancy Vargas: Hey, I heard ya. Sounds like you got some inside info. You hear about the robbery they busted?
- Serena: Ask her. It's her store.
- Nancy Vargas: Sorry. Didn't recognize you without peejays. So now, whaddya know?
- Molly: You sure talk fast.
- Nancy Vargas: Part of the job, so spill. Gimme the goods on that wicked hissyfit the Scouts were into when I walked in.
- Molly: Huh? Um, I really couldn't say. Must've had a post-burglary shock or something. Serena, wait for me!
- Nancy Vargas: If you change your mind, you've got my number.
- Serena: Whew, that was close. Wonder how she knew where we go to school.
- Nancy Vargas: Huh?
- Luna: I'm getting bad vibes about her.
- Sailor Jupiter: Faster, you guys! We can't let her get away!
- Sailor Moon: All right. That's it. You're not allowed to use my butt for practice kicks. Why don't you try this, Mars?
- Sailor Mars: Hey, this is your gig, girlfriend, but every time you eat a little dirt, you just wanna call the whole thing off, and then you wonder why we don't respect you!
- Sailor Moon: Well, maybe this isn't such a good idea, but there's gotta be another way to find the entrance to the Negaverse that doesn't turn me totally black and blue.
- Sailor Mars: You wanna free Tuxedo Mask from the Negaverse, then you gotta be willing to take a few knocks.
- Sailor Moon: I know, but couldn't we practice a little more gently?
- Sailor Mars: WHAT A WIMP! Serena, you're the one who volunteered to fake out the Negaverse so they'd think you wanted to quit and then come take you back with them!
- Sailor Moon: I don't like this plan.
- Luna: It's too late now. The Negaverse has already got its feelers out. If you didn't want to do it, you should've told us right up front.
- Sailor Moon: Keep it down. You're making my head hurt.
- Mina: Artemis, has there been anything in the Daily Surprise about the robbery?
- Artemis: There sure has. That reporter was probably in on the whole thing.
- Mina: What?
- Serena: What? Are you serious?
- Mina: Look at this shot. Serena, can't you ever keep your jaw shut?
- Serena: Excuse me?
- Mina: Your mouth looks humongous in this picture.
- Serena: Oooh. Talk about a big mouth.
- Mina: Maybe it's the angle?
- Artemis: Stop squabbling. We've been watching that reporter ever since the robbery. Nancy Vargas usually works on big political stories or international intrigue, not piddly store robberies.
- Lita: You think the Negaverse has gotten to her?
- Artemis: Gotta be.
- Serena: All right.
- Other Girls: Huh?
- Serena: That means I'm an even better actor than I thought. That's so cool. The Negaverse totally thinks I wanna ditch you guys.
- Amy: You mean we want to ditch you, right?
- Serena: Oh, yeah. That, too.
- Lita: There's only way to find out for sure.
- Amy, Raye, & Mina: Huh?
- Serena: Hmm?
- Luna: Now be honest. You're really willing to go through with this plan? We can call it off.
- Serena: Nah. Piece of cake.
- Lita: I know you can do this, but we'll be standing by if you happen to get into trouble.
- Raye: It's guaranteed if Serena's involved.
- Serena: What's that supposed to mean?
- Other Girls: Huh?
- Serena: You know something, Raye? I'm really starting to believe you wouldn't mind if I DID quit.
- Mina: Come on, Serena. You don't really mean that.
- Serena: Well, it's not like she hasn't made it clear she wants to be leader.
- Raye: Come on. That's all ancient history.
- Serena: Oh yeah? Is that so?
- Raye: I can do this longer than you.
- Serena: Wanna bet?
- Amy: Anyone got a bottle of aspirin?
- Serena: Okay. This is the place.
- Serena & Luna: Woah.
- Serena: She must take a bazillion pictures to pay for a cool place like this.
- Luna: Stop gawking and ring the bell already, Serena. Let's get this over with.
- Serena: All right. All right.
- Other Girls: Good luck.
- Nancy Vargas: May I help you?
- Serena: Nancy Vargas, right? I have a message for you from Sailor Moon.
- Nancy Vargas: Sailor Moon? Really? Boy, her grammar's horrible. Says she wants to meet me at the Memorial Park at eleven tonight. Be on time and come alone. Wants to do an exclusive interview for the Daily Surprise; discuss leaving the Sailor Scouts. How did you end up with this? You know Sailor Moon?
- Serena: No, my friend Molly found it after the burglary, but she's way too shy to bring it.
- Luna: Oh, there go my eardrums.
- Nancy Vargas: Well, thanks a lot. Hope it wasn't too much trouble for you to bring it.
- Serena: No, it was on my way. Ha ha. Just on my way to the... library.
- Nancy Vargas: Hmm, so Sailor Moon wants out.
- Malachite: Beryl's restless, Ninjana. What's up?
- Ninjana: See for yourself, Malachite.
- Malachite: You're turning into a bat?
- Ninjana: Aren't you the snidemeister? Check it out.
- Malachite: Hmm, she can't spell.
- Ninjana: I'm meeting Sailor Moon at eleven tonight. I assume you'll be coming.
- Malachite: Of course. Wouldn't want to miss Sailor Moon's surrender.
- Sailor Moon: Eleven o'clock. Won't be long now. Oh, scary place, but I'm gonna go through with this. I'm gonna find the entrance to the Negaverse, and I'll show those guys...
- Ninjana: Sailor Moon, I presume?
- Sailor Moon: Oh, uh, how-how'd you get here?
- Nancy Vargas: Hey, let's get one thing straight, okay? I'M the one asking the questions.
- Sailor Moon: Well, excuse me, but I'm not used to squealing to the press.
- Nancy Vargas: Hmm. Let's get started.
- Sailor Moon: Sure. Ask away.
- Nancy Vargas: You're quitting the hero business?
- Sailor Moon: Uh, yeah. Too much competition and petty jealousy.
- Nancy Vargas: Yeah... so I heard.
- Sailor Moon: Oh... The burglar!
- Ninjana: More than a mere burglar. Welcome, Malachite.
- Sailor Moon: Huh? Malachite?
- Malachite: Always a pleasure, Sailor Moon.
- Sailor Moon: What are you doing here? If I'd have known you were coming, I wouldn't have wasted my time on this airhead.
- Ninjana: Who are you calling an airhead?
- Sailor Moon: Oh, sorry. Must've been misquoted.
- Malachite: Let's just stick to business, okay Sailor Moon? Here's the deal: You give us the Imperium Crystal, we'll let you come back with us.
- Sailor Moon: Huh? Just 'cause I quit the Sailor Scouts, bleach-head? No way I'd ever work for the Negaverse, and I didn't come here to make any deals.
- Malachite: Not even to save your friend? You know, Tuxedo Mask's not doing so well.
- Sailor Moon: You're bluffing!
- Malachite: No, he's very weak. We're not even sure how much longer he's gonna last. That last battle really took it out of him, but I'm sure he'd feel better if you were around. Come back with us, then you two can be together like you want.
- Sailor Moon: But he doesn't remember me.
- Malachite: 'Course he does. That's why we have to destroy you.
- Sailor Moon: You're lying!
- Malachite: I don't appreciate being called a liar. Now, if you wanna see him again, you'll hand over the Crescent Moon Wand NOW!
- Sailor Moon: *thinking* If he IS telling the truth, maybe I can trick him and save Darien all by myself.
- Ninjana: So, what's it gonna be, Princess?
- Sailor Moon: I've got a better idea.
- Malachite: And that would be...?
- Sailor Moon: You guys transport Tuxedo Mask here, and I'll make him better THEN give you the wand. Whaddya say? Have we got a deal?
- Sailor Mars: Did you hear that?! She'd give up the wand!
- Ninjana: Hmm... Malachite, we've got company.
- Malachite: Hmm.
- Ninjana: Want me to get rid of 'em?
- Malachite: Don't bother. They're not important anymore.
- Sailor Moon: So? We got ourselves a deal or what, 'cause if not, I don't like wasting my time with Negasleaze like you.
- Malachite: Tuxedo Mask isn't strong enough to travel.
- Sailor Moon: Then forget it.
- Malachite: He's right through that warp hole, and so is your freedom! Queen Beryl'll give you anything you want. Whaddya say?
- Sailor Moon: Kinda creepy, isn't it?
- Malachite: What are you? Afraid?
- Sailor Moon: No, I'm not afraid, uh, but if I go, you won't let those Sailor brats follow me, will ya?
- Sailor Mars: Who's that brat think she is calling US brats?!
- Sailor Jupiter: It's part of the plan.
- Sailor Moon: I don't know. I need to know more about this warp hole. I mean, no offense, but I don't trust you guys.
- Ninjana: You're not so dumb after all, kid.
- Sailor Moon: Help!
- Ninjana: Hm hm hm ha ha. Now, where's that crystal?
- Sailor Moon: I knew I shouldn't have trusted you, you Negatrash.
- Ninjana: You poor, innocent soul. It never crossed your mind to double-cross us? It's really too bad you're not a Scout anymore. They could've helped ya.
- Sailor Moon: But they'll be here. They're still your enemy, you know?
- Ninjana: You'd think they'd save you?
- Sailor Mercury: We should go help her.
- Sailor Jupiter: We stick to her plan.
- Sailor Mars: Right. Remember Darien. We gotta get readings on that warp hole with your computer.
- Malachite: Come on, Sailor Moon. Hand over your Moon Wand. What do you need it for anymore? You're retired.
- Sailor Jupiter: Don't do it.
- Sailor Venus: Don't worry. She won't.
- Ninjana: Your friends are here, you know? They obviously don't care.
- Sailor Moon: *thinking* Maybe they really DO want to get rid of me. Maybe that was the whole point of this thing.
- Sailor Jupiter: I can't stand it. Let's go.
- Sailor Mercury: Me, too.
- Sailor Mars: No, we go with her plan.
- Ninjana: I'm losing patience.
- Sailor Jupiter: The plan's failed, Mars, and pretty soon, they'll get the wand...
- Sailor Mercury: and the crystal.
- Sailor Mars: No they won't.
- Sailor Venus: Sailor Mars...
- Sailor Mars: It's not what you think. I didn't steal it. She left it in my room, so I kept it.
- Sailor Venus: Hey, you know... that wasn't right.
- Sailor Mars: It's not 'cause I want it.
- Sailor Jupiter: You sure?
- Sailor Moon: Help!
- Ninjana: Give up, Sailor Moon.
- Sailor Moon: Not without seeing Darien.
- Ninjana: That will never happen.
- Sailor Jupiter: How's she supposed to fight?
- Sailor Moon: Sailor Scouts, help me! I mean it! Really! You gotta help me protect the crystal.
- Sailor Mars: Sailor Scouts, CHARGE!
- Sailor Jupiter: Hey, it's about time.
- Sailor Mars: Back off, if you know what's good for you! Sailor Scouts are here! I am Mars!
- Sailor Mercury: I am Mercury!
- Sailor Jupiter: Sailor Jupiter!
- Sailor Venus: Sailor Venus!
- Sailor Mars: We are the Sailor Scouts!
- Sailor Jupiter: Champions of Justice!
- Sailor Moon: And not a moment too soon.
- Malachite: So, you finally showed up. Guess the Scouts ARE still a team.
- Sailor Scouts: Yeah.
- Sailor Mars: Yeah, well, everybody makes mistakes, eh, blondie? MARS FIRE IGNITE!
- Sailor Moon: Oh, that feels so good.
- Sailor Jupiter: JUPITER THUNDER...
- Sailor Venus: VENUS CRESCENT BEAM...
- Sailor Jupiter: CRASH!
- Sailor Venus: SMASH!
- Malachite: You haven't seen the last of me, Sailor Scouts. So, until next time.
- Ninjana: Sailor Moon... Give me that crystal!
- Sailor Mars: Here! Sailor Moon, transform her!
- Ninjana: Better multiply my odds fast, seeing there are so many of you now. All right. Which one of you Sailor wimps goes first?
- Sailor Mercury: I'll go. MERCURY BUBBLES BLAST!
- Sailor Moon: Feel kinda lost in a fog? Well, you are, but not for long. I am Sailor Moon, Champion of Justice! On behalf of the Moon, I will right wrongs and triumph over evil, and that means you.