Sailor Moon Episode Four
So You Want to be a Superstar

Serena:Man, it's the... third time this week i'll be late for school! I gotta slow down to think of an excuse. Huh? What's this? "Saffron's Vitamins Help Give Energy".
Molly: Serena! Serena! Huh? Come on! We're late!
Serena: Ooh... Thanks a lot, Molly!
Serena: Ow! This bump hurts.
Molly: I didn't mean it, Serena. I'm not used to being late. I panicked.
Melvin: Serena! Molly! Look who's featured in today's entertainment page!
Serena: What'd you do, Melvin? Steal it off a building?
Melvin: No, Serena. It's my very own authentic copy I won fair and square in a contest I entered when I joined the Saffron Fan Club last month through the internet.
Molly: You joined Saffron's fan club?
Melvin: Yeah, they give lots of nifty information. Did you see she got $5 million for her very first role?
Serena: No way! 5 million bucks? I wonder if she needs a personalassistant or something like that.
Pauline: If I got $5 million, I'd buy my family a great big house.
Lonna: I'd buy everyone a new car.
Molly: I'd shop at all the malls and buy tons of clothes and makeup!
Lonna: Oh yeah! For sure!
Pauline: I'm gonna get an agent and become a superstar, too.
Melvin: In my humble but expert opinion, I do believe one of you could be real be a superstar.
Pauline: So come on. Spit it out!
Melvin: That'd be the one and only, mesmerizing, stunningly beautiful, incomparable... Miss Serena!
Serena: Huh?
Melvin: You would be great!
Serena: Me? A superstar? For real? Cool!
Saffron: There. My autograph.
Jedite: Hm hm hm hm. I could use this girl. I must tell Queen Beryl.
Queen Beryl: I'm counting on you, Jedite. Do not disappoint me! Through this... little girl, we will gather awesome power for the Nega Force! HA HA HA HA!
Serena: Molly, are you sure about this?
Molly: Yep. We'll have our names up in lights before we know it, Serena.
Serena: I know how!
Molly: What?
Serena: We'll be sports stars!
Molly: Huh? Nah uh. No way. I'm the manager, and I've got a plan. I've come up with a foolproof way to make us rich megastars!
Serena: How's that?
Molly: Rock videos!
Serena: All right! That's a wicked cool idea!
Luna (thinking): Please tell me she's not going to sing!
Molly: Okay. we're gonna be one hot team, right?
Serena: We're gonna be world-famous!
Molly: Alright! Let's do it!
(Serena and Molly singing...badly): Fighting evil by moonlight. Winning love by daylight. Never running from a real fight! She is the one named...
Sammy: Hey, are you trying to torture me?
Serena: You're ruining our practice!
Molly: But we could use him as a backup dancer.
Sammy: Ha ha. Gotta run!
Molly: Ha! I knew that'd get rid of him!
(more singing): Fighting evil by... Fighting evil by moonlight... oh
Molly: AAAAAH!
Serena: Not bad at all, but you can't keep screaming.
Molly: YOU WERE SQUASHING MY FOOT!
Serena: YOU WERE TOO CLOSE!
Molly: Maybe I should go get your brother to do this!. He certainly can't be any worse that you are, Serena!
Serena: Your stupid routine would make anybody dance like a big geek!
Luna: And they say catfights are bad.
Serena: I was looking forward to being rich and famous.
Serena's Mom: This guy's so funny!
Serena's Dad: He's brilliant! I don't know how he gets the monkey to do that!
Serena: No, Dad. YOU'RE brilliant! AAAH! Ha ha ha. You just figured out how i'm going to become a megastar!
Serena's Dad: Has she eaten alot of sweets today?
Serena's Mom: Not that I'm aware of.
Sammy: Face it. She's just a space case.
Serena: Come on, Luna! Back to work!
Luna: Oh. Cats... aren't meant to dance and sing, Serena.
Serena: Hey Luna, if you can talk, I'm sure you can dance and sing. Now quit making up excuses!
Melvin: Hey Molly, open up! It's you-know-who for the secret meeting you couldn't tell me about on the phone!
Molly: Would you keep it down? Jeez.
Molly: Amazing what a little makeup and the right clothes can do!
Melvin: I'm still not sure how I let you talk me into this. I never wear anything but black.
Molly: Just chill out. It wont matter when we're a world-famous duo.
Melvin: I'm gonna be famous?
Molly: You will be if you listen and do everything I tell you to do because we're gonna do rock videos!
Melvin: Maybe I'll even win an award. WOOOW! Listen. I've already got a great speach! I'd like to thank all of my closest friends on the internet, and my fantastic manager, Molly!
Molly: This might work. Ha ha ha.
Monster of the Day (MoD): Hah! Saffron, you're mine!
Saffron: AAAAH! HELP! AH! LET GO! AH! Let go. Somebody help me.
Jedite: You, too, can be famous, but first you've got to know how. Here to tell you, the fabulous Saffron.
MoD Saffron: Hello, everyone. I'm happy to bring you great news! You're all invited to take part in our thrilling Star Quest contest!
Student: I can't believe it's really her!
Student 2: She's tall in person.
MoD Saffron: So join us. Just be sure you sign up in teams of two.
Student: Let's do it!
Student 2: Yeah. We can team up together.
Other Students: We'll all be like superstars! We wanna be just like Saffron!
Pauline: Did you guys hear about Saffron's big Star Quest contest?
Serena: What contest? Huh?
Molly: Wait, let me guess. You were asleep?
Serena: No, I had to stay in class for study hall.
Lonna: Anyway, she said two lucky people will get picked as the winners.
Pauline: Everybody's eligible, and the winning team gets a contract just like Saffron's.
Serena: Ha ha ha. Our team's set!
Molly: Well, aren't you forgetting something, Serena? You don't have a partner.
Melvin: Hmmm? Are you talking about me? Hey Molly, check out this cool move for my new routine.
Molly: I told you not to say we're partners!
Melvin: Then I wont tell how you begged me to do it, either!
MoD Saffron: You're all signed up, right?
All: RIGHT!
Police Officer: What's this? No one told me about this.
Agent: Saffron, what in the world are you doing up on that stage? You're supposed to be at the mall!
MoD Saffron: Remember, you need to show you have great energy.
Officer & Agent: Oh! Hey...
Officer: Yahoo!
Agent: TA-DA!
MoD Saffron: A perfect example!
Officer & Agent: We'll be superstars!
Serena: This contest will be major boss, Luna.
Luna: I'm not going.
Serena: You can't back out.
Luna: I'm not backing out because I never agreed to be in it in the first place.
Serena: You've just got stage fright.
Luna: I'm only afraid that you're going to start forgetting all about your mission.
Serena: We'll be rich and famous.
Luna: I'm not going.
Serena: Why?
Luna: Because we've got more important things to do than just make fools of ourselves. Besides, being in show business is serious work. It's all too strange: too suspicious. And look what's happening between you and your friends. Crying wont help, Serena. The answer's still no.
Serena (crying): WHO NEEDS YOU ANYWAY!
Darien: Hey.
Serena: I hope he doesn't come over here.
Darien: Hey, Meatball-Head, what are you doing over here? I thought for sure you'd be over at the talent show...
Serena: Huh? Hmph.
Darien: ...especially since all your friends are over there, acting like total fools.
Serena: Well obviously, I have better things to do, Darien. I'd love to stay and chat, but... I've got homework. (walks off) He makes me so mad!
Pauline: Do you know why elephants wear green sneakers?
Lonna: No, why?
Pauline: It's so they can sneak around in the grass!
MoD Saffron: You're in! Congratulations!
Molly & Melvin (singing): Never running from a real fight...
MoD Saffron: That was great! You're in, too!
Molly: We did it!
Melvin: We sounded really good, too!
MoD Saffron: Congratulattions to all of you. You've made it into the final round of competition. We'll see you all at the South Side Auditorium on Saturday to pick the winners.
Serena: Rats, I'm late for study hall. Oh. What's going on?
Pauline: Okay. Now, why don't we do our knock-knock jokes?
Lonna: All right. Me first. Knock-knock...
Serena: Wanna get ice cream later? Huh?
Molly: Can't. Busy.
Melvin: PARTY TIME! Get ready for a hot Star Quest party! Hey Serena, have a streamer.
Molly: And my autograph cards are finished just in time!
Serena: You won the contest?
Pauline: No, she's just got fame on the brain.
Lonna: Besides, we all know we're the best.
Melvin: Who cares? We're all gonna win!
Luna: Are you really sure that your not still angry with me for refusing to be in the contest with you?
Serena: Actually, I'm glad that you did.
Luna: But it looks like your friends are having so much fun.
Serena: Nope, it's all to much work for me.
Luna: Really? Hmm?
Serena: Hmm... I wonder if they'll still talk to me when they're rich and famous?
Luna: They will if they are true friends.
Molly: It's been really great practicing with all you guys.
Melvin: We wont forget you once we've won.
Pauline: Who says you'll win it?
Lonna: You'll be lucky if you win last place!
Pauline & Lonna: Yeah!
Pauline: We're gonna be the next superstars!
Serena: I'll be glad when this whole thing's over.
Serena: How weird. I thought this place was closed months ago.
MoD Saffron: Everyone's ready? We need you all to be ready. We're expecting you all to put on a good show. Remember: lots of energy!
Lonna: You know your punchlines?
Pauline: Yeah.
Molly: It's packed out there.
Lonna: We're gonna win!
Pauline: Right.
Officer: My one-armed handstand!
Agent: And my super stomache cruncher!
MoD Saffron: Hm hm hm. Now to get energy for Queen Beryl.
Jedite: Excellent. Queen Beryl will be very pleased.
Serena: Luna, what's that? Huh?
Luna: Energy waves!
MoD: Hi. May I help you, dear?
Serena: Oh no! Luna, let's get out of here!
Luna: Serena, wait!
Luna: Serena, you all right? It's time to become Sailor Moon. Let's go!
Serena: I can't. I'm to scared.
Luna: But your friends are in big trouble! It must be Queen Beryl's doing.
Serena: Okay, if I really have to. MOON PRISM POWER!
MoD: HA, HA, HA... Uh oh.
Sailor Moon: The curtain is closed on this bogus talent competition! Now, give these people back there energy!
MoD: Who are you?!
Sailor Moon: I'm Sailor Moon, the Champion of Justice. On behalf of the Moon, I shall right wrongs and triumph over evil, and that means YOU!
MoD: Hah!
Sailor Moon: You don't scare me one little bit.
MoD: You can't hide.
Sailor Moon: If you see Luna, please tell her I could use her help right about now.
MoD: Looking for me?
Sailor Moon: AAAH! She's freezing me! Let go! Stop it! I can hardly raise it. HELP! My fingers. They're turning into icicles! AAH! Someone turn on the heat...
MoD: NOw that outta cool you off. Hey, what's happening? Who dares?
Tuxedo Mask: You must believe in yourself, Sailor Moon.
Sailor Moon: Tuxedo Mask! Thank you!
Tuxedo Mask: Don't mention it.
MoD: Who's that man in the cape? Let's find out!
Sailor Moon: Hi.
Luna: Don't let her get away!
Sailor Moon: I won't. MOON TIARA POWER! I banish you to the Negaverse!
Luna: You defeated them, Sailor Moon.
Molly: Oh wow. That was a weird dream.
Melvin: Yeah.
Lonna: You know what?
Pauline: You never wanna hear another knock-knock joke.
Lonna: Exactly.
Real Saffron: I must be working to hard.
Serena: oh wow, what a week.
Luna: I was really proud of you today.
Serena: Thanks.
Luna: Now, use all that good energy...
Serena: uh huh.
Luna: ... to study.
Serena: OH! study?! oh.

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