RANDOM THOUGHTS.....BY GMITTER

1. WHY IS IT THAT A DOG GETS MAD WHEN YOU BLOW IN ITS FACE BUT AS SOON AS YOU GET IT IN A CAR IT STICKS ITS HEAD OUT THE WINDOW??

2. WHAT IS THE VELOCITY OF A SQUIRREL AFTER BEING SHOT OUT OF A POTATO GUN?

3. IM IN SHAPE...........................................ROUND IS A SHAPE!!

4. DO CHINESE PEOPLE REFER TO AMERICANS AS "STRAIGHT EYES"?

5. HOW CAN SOMETHING BE "NEW" AND "IMPROVED"?

6. POLITICS.....THINK ABOUT THAT WORD....."POLI" MEANING MANY AND "TICS" BEING BLOOD-SUCKING PARASITES........COINCEDENSE........I THINK NOT!!

7. DO ILLITERATE PEOPLE TRULY GET THE WHOLE EFFECT OF ALPHABET SOUP?

8. WHY IS THERE BRAIL ON THE DRIVE UP ATM?

9. WHY IS THERE BRAIL ON ANY ATM.....BLIND PEOPLE  CANT SEE THE SCREEN!!!

10. IF AT FIRST YOU DONT SUCCEED.....SKYDIVING IS NOT YOUR SPORT!!

11. WHY DO KAMIKAZEE BOMBERS WEAR HELMETS?
12. PEOPLE SAY THAT THEY PUT DEAR HEADS ON THEIR WALL BECAUSE THEY ARE BEAUTIFUL AND THEY ARE PROUD.....WELL MY DAD THINKS MY MOM IS BEAUTIFUL AND HE' PROUD OF HER BUT HE AINT HANGING HER HEAD ON THE WALL!!!!!!!
13. IF A MAN FROM AUSTRAILIA LOSES A TESTICLE......IS HE NOW THE "ONE NUT WONDER FROM DOWN UNDER?
14. I DONT WORK OUT BECAUSE MY PHILOSOPHY IS "NO PAIN...............WELL NO PAIN"
15. MORE TO COME........