What's blue and flies around the room at high speeds?
A baby with a punctured lung.
How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole?
Stick a javelin through it's head.
How many babies does it take to paint a house?
Depends how hard you throw them.
Why do you stick a baby in the blender feet first?
So you can see the expression on its face!
What's more fun than stapling babies to a wall?
Ripping them off again.
Why did the baby cross the road?
Cause it was nailed to the chicken
How do you spoil a baby?
Leave it out in the sun.